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June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, feeling the need to spice things up in our sex life, I dressed up in my husband's navy uniform jacket, hat, and a pair of heels. When he came into the room, he took one look at me and started laughing uncontrollably. FML

#20702628
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58201) - you deserved it (17581)

On 06/03/2013 at 12:41am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my parents decided they are going to come with me on my first date. FML

#20734991
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58038) - you deserved it (4322)

On 06/19/2013 at 10:39am - misc - by Overprotected (woman) - United States

Today, I got the bill for the flowers my husband arranged to be delivered to me while he's out of town next week. I also got the bill for the flowers he's sending to the floozy he'll be seeing next week while he's out of town. The gift tag for it was: "I can't wait to see you." FML

#20706851
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57886) - you deserved it (3661)

On 06/05/2013 at 1:02am - love - by Justme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, in class, we were discussing stereotypes. We were asked about common ones about nearby cities. A guy said, "Well, they say Lumberton has the prettiest girls." My teacher asked if any of us were from Lumberton, so I raised my hand. The guy quickly said, "Nevermind." FML

#20717445
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57751) - you deserved it (5623)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:04pm - misc - by wellthanks (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me pretty. Not because he actually thinks I'm pretty, but because "Hey, how else is a guy supposed to get laid?" FML

#20754112
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57345) - you deserved it (6760)

On 06/29/2013 at 11:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I took my girlfriend of nearly 2 years out to dinner so I could propose. When the waiter brought the check, I caused a bit of a scene to get everyone's attention. When I got on my knee and proposed, she said no and asked if I could hurry up and pay, because she was embarrassed. FML

#20744819
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57292) - you deserved it (16193)

On 06/24/2013 at 4:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom walked into the bathroom while I was taking a pic to send to my long-distance boyfriend. She then told me I would go to hell for flaunting myself at guys. I was fully clothed, sending a pic to see if he liked my new haircut. That and I'm 21. FML

#20716841
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57233) - you deserved it (4386)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:13am - misc - by Crazy Mom (woman) - United States

Today, I caught my 16-year-old daughter and her boyfriend trying to use a latex glove as a condom. FML

#20735858
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56909) - you deserved it (8878)

On 06/19/2013 at 7:40pm - intimacy - by whatno - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend kicked me out for bringing up the idea of her maybe giving me a blowjob someday. According to her, it's "demeaning" and "sick". She doesn't seem to have a problem always making me go down on her for ages as a condition for having sex with me, though. FML

#20754518
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56810) - you deserved it (9103)

On 06/29/2013 at 3:58pm - intimacy - by patriarchal apparently (man) - Saint Lucia

Today, I got mugged on the way to my 21st birthday party at a bar. I begged the thug to at least throw me my ID, only to have him laugh and run away singing "happy birthday". FML

#20711068
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56229) - you deserved it (3549)

On 06/07/2013 at 1:14am - money - by ididntevendrinkthatnight - United States (New York)

Today, my dad was teasing me, saying a guy would have to be blind to go on a date with me. I then introduced him to my new, visually impaired boyfriend. He hasn't stopped laughing. FML

#20724232
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56183) - you deserved it (6806)

On 06/13/2013 at 8:30pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I let my step-father know exactly what I thought of him. After a few moments of awkward silence, he leaned towards me and quietly whispered, "Well you're adopted. Your parents never loved you." FML

#20707377
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56098) - you deserved it (13886)

On 06/05/2013 at 11:24am - misc - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States

Today, I threw a birthday party for my boyfriend. As a joke, my friend and I served him non-alcoholic beer to see how he'd react. After a while, he faked being drunk, using it as an excuse after I caught him making out with one of my so-called "friends". FML

#20709553
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55865) - you deserved it (11271)

On 06/06/2013 at 12:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Senegal



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