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April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while I was in the shower, I heard a door slam. Assuming it was my fiancé, I shouted "I love you!" I later opened the bathroom door to see my stereo and television missing. I'd said "I love you" to whoever robbed my apartment. FML

#20632198
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55884) - you deserved it (5320)

On 04/30/2013 at 3:54am - money - by ShowerGirl (woman) - United States

Today, I got cut from my track team. My coach told me it was because my sprints were "too fast" for his liking. Huh? FML

#20602567
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55604) - you deserved it (3699)

On 04/18/2013 at 4:34pm - misc - by bhnja_ (man) - Philippines (Mandaue)

Today, a huge and angry man stormed into my work and threatened to kill me if I didn't stop sleeping with his wife. He then threatened to come back and kick my ass if I so much as texted his wife again. The problem is, I'm married, have never cheated and I work for my wife's father. FML

#20622462
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55359) - you deserved it (2941)

On 04/26/2013 at 1:20am - love - by sad guy - United States

Today, in my rush to do my hair and get to work, I managed to trip over my dog, hit my eye on the counter, and sprain my ankle. I arrived at work with a black eye and a painful limp. My boss didn't care, and fired me for showing up late. FML

#20609262
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55057) - you deserved it (7004)

On 04/21/2013 at 1:07am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my fiancée broke off our engagement. For some bizarre reason, she'd hidden a pair of expensive boots and her iPad underneath our ride-on mower. I turned the mower on and destroyed both without realizing it. According to her, the fault is all mine. FML

#20630400
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54874) - you deserved it (3797)

On 04/29/2013 at 2:07pm - love - by Wow. Really? - United States (Ohio)

Today, is the day of the biggest concert in the state of Florida, and it's also my birthday. I was so excited to hear my mom got tickets. It was for her boyfriend and her. I'm stuck at home babysitting. FML

#20589773
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54777) - you deserved it (4103)

On 04/14/2013 at 9:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my grandpa moved into the apartment next door. The walls are wafer-thin. Goodbye sex life. FML

Today, I was trying out my first vibrator. Soon enough, my 12-year-old sister opened my door, walked in, and saw me naked from the waist down. She laughed, called me a virgin, and left. FML

#20574621
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54557) - you deserved it (18383)

On 04/04/2013 at 12:04pm - intimacy - by Ribbed for Her Disaster (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I overheard my boyfriend talking to his mom about me. It sounded like they were planning something for me, like a marriage. They were planning how to break up with me. FML

#20609750
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54406) - you deserved it (5844)

On 04/21/2013 at 9:33am - love - by jerk_ex_boyfriend - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, it has been over 3 months since my housemates ended their 1 month long relationship. He's still creepily obsessed with her. He picked the bathroom lock when I was in the shower and tried to get in, and then called me a "fucking c*nt" when he realised it was me in there, not her. FML

#20604478
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54359) - you deserved it (4239)

On 04/19/2013 at 7:44am - misc - by pleasekillme (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

#20577178
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54319) - you deserved it (5950)

On 04/06/2013 at 7:42am - misc - by confusedcatlover (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I told the guy I've liked since we were children that I'm madly in love with him. He replied with, "Aw, I love you too, as a sister." I was speechless. He patted me on the back and said, "Better luck next time." FML

#20603007
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54276) - you deserved it (6255)

On 04/18/2013 at 7:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, it is my birthday. Since my parents are in the middle of a divorce, my mom thought it was perfectly reasonable to burn the gifts my dad got for me in the fireplace. FML

#20578709
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54246) - you deserved it (2736)

On 04/07/2013 at 5:19am - misc - by child of a crazed women (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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