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April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I found out that my classmates hate me so much that they have a seating arrangement where people have to sit next to me on a rotating basis. A fight broke out yesterday because someone tried to skip their turn. FML

#20585229
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56878) - you deserved it (10294)

On 04/11/2013 at 4:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, I finally hooked up with the guy that I have been in love with forever. If there is such a thing as soul mates, this guy is it. He's my best friend in the whole world. It was the worst sex I have ever had. FML

#20620111
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56863) - you deserved it (11163)

On 04/25/2013 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Live Sweet -

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she heard me say "love you" on the phone. I was talking to my mom. FML

#20596513
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56781) - you deserved it (4659)

On 04/16/2013 at 2:13pm - love - by fucklife - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML

#20598610
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56747) - you deserved it (5528)

On 04/17/2013 at 2:14am - love - by rawdoglyfe69 - United States (Montana)

Today, my ex-boyfriend, with whom I'm still madly in love, called me and begged me to come back to him. In shock, I asked, "Is this some kind of joke?" He giggled, said yes, and then promptly hung up. FML

#20595377
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56577) - you deserved it (6400)

On 04/15/2013 at 10:20pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I got a letter from Yale law school saying I got a 4 year full scholarship. I called my dad crying and read the whole thing... even the bottom, which said, "April fools! Love mom and dad." FML

#20570035
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56383) - you deserved it (5712)

On 04/01/2013 at 1:46pm - misc - by madiison09 - United States

Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML

#20624343
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56309) - you deserved it (12006)

On 04/27/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my school took part in a standardized state test. After finishing, I decided to take a nap, only to be awoken by the test monitor, who wanted me to leave. Apparently, I was ferociously farting in my sleep and was disturbing the people still taking the test. FML

#20618481
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55589) - you deserved it (12383)

On 04/24/2013 at 3:14pm - misc - by Skyler - United States

Today, my husband told me that he thinks I am getting a little heavy and may need to lay off the junk food. The ultrasound is hanging on our fridge. FML

#20595162
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55230) - you deserved it (5219)

On 04/15/2013 at 9:35pm - kids - by Mimi (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend from high school contacted me, telling me we should hang out some time; I casually agreed. Two hours later she's on my doorstep in tears, wanting me to take her back. She's married with kids. I live four states away and haven't a clue how she found out where I live. FML

#20611227
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55064) - you deserved it (3683)

On 04/21/2013 at 7:26pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while my boyfriend was in the kitchen, he got three text messages, all of which were from "Babe 2", "Babe 3", and "Babe 4". FML

#20607010
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54838) - you deserved it (6729)

On 04/20/2013 at 8:02am - love - by How strange - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me that she's a lesbian. And that she could only stay with me because I had a "girly face and voice". She also admitted to having a crush on my sister. FML

#20600192
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54603) - you deserved it (4634)

On 04/17/2013 at 7:01pm - love - by wut... (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my former fiancée, who I stopped seeing 5 months ago, married another guy. She wore the dress that I'd purchased for our would-be wedding. FML

#20630309
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54599) - you deserved it (5019)

On 04/29/2013 at 1:07pm - love - by Good Luck Chuck (man) - United States (Florida)



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