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February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, the attractive guy I barely speak to in my statistics class gave me a rose for Valentine's Day because he remembered they were my favorite. My husband got me a roll of quarters and told me to go buy myself "something pretty." FML

#20507681
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40826) - you deserved it (3986)

On 02/15/2013 at 1:07am - love - by RosesAreRed (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, it's my first day at a new school. I transferred here halfway through the year to get away from a girl who bullies me. She's apparently bullied her mom into transferring her here as well. FML

#20513405
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40800) - you deserved it (2781)

On 02/19/2013 at 12:05pm - misc - by SchoolSucks (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking down the street in the dark, and the woman in front of me kept looking back nervously. I jokingly assured her that I wasn't a mugger. She then took out a knife and mugged me. FML

#20505342
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40630) - you deserved it (4555)

On 02/13/2013 at 7:00pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my parents told me that I'm no longer allowed to come home from boarding school on weekends because it will confuse my cats and disrupt their lives. FML

#20519879
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40549) - you deserved it (2631)

On 02/24/2013 at 6:17am - animals - by incendiaaa (woman) - Australia

Today, while using a public restroom to change my tampon, I made eye contact with someone looking at me through the little space in the door. FML

#20496769
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40442) - you deserved it (2480)

On 02/07/2013 at 4:51am - misc - by fviz (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were having a casual conversation, when the topic suddenly became my penis. Before I knew what was going on, she said, "It's not the size that matters though. It's how you use it. So I guess you're ok." FML

#20491476
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39952) - you deserved it (4879)

On 02/03/2013 at 11:27am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Serbia

Today, I had to explain to my white girlfriend that dating me doesn't give her the right to call my mother the n-word. FML

#20507523
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39931) - you deserved it (8541)

On 02/14/2013 at 11:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I realized that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air freshener in my girlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my girlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. FML

#20503125
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39752) - you deserved it (8020)

On 02/11/2013 at 11:59pm - intimacy - by thefriedman (man) - United States (California)

Today, whilst on a phone interview with a college I really want to go to, my mother picks up the other line and shouts into the phone "She's not going to college, she's lazy and she'll only disappoint you." The interviewer hung up before I could say anything. FML

#20508072
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39416) - you deserved it (2619)

On 02/15/2013 at 10:50am - misc - by parentalissues (woman) - United States

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

#20516035
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39198) - you deserved it (10355)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my mom accused me of stealing money from her purse. Being totally innocent, I reminded her that the only other person with access to it is her boyfriend. She said she trusts him because she loves him. They've been dating for 2 months. I've been her daughter for 25 years. FML

#20491987
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38886) - you deserved it (2149)

On 02/03/2013 at 7:26pm - money - by :/ (woman) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML

#20510302
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38681) - you deserved it (9278)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Notaplacetogo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38610) - you deserved it (3061)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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