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October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me by saying, "It's not you, it's me . I have a terrible taste in women." FML

#20140004
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28181) - you deserved it (2926)

On 10/30/2012 at 9:27am - love - by LonelyMe -

Today , wile walking down te all of my old scool , I noticed someting out of te corner of my eye . Biend te faculty parking lot were I parked my truck , two students were aving sex on my tailgate . FML

#20099948
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28046) - you deserved it (2645)

On 10/03/2012 at 1:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, mah parents gave me a sock and looool card 4 mah eighteenth birthday. The card said, "Now that Dobby is free, get out." mega FML

#20118693
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28012) - you deserved it (3436)

On 10/15/2012 at 9:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I Cummed Home To Fine An Almost Completely Devoured Cheesecake, The Notebook Playing On The TV, And A Shoe Thrown At My Head . It's Safe To Say My Grlfriend Is Just About On Her Period . FML

#20128340
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27973) - you deserved it (4998)

On 10/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by jesushelpme (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today after much reluctance due to fear of causing a huge debate I finally posted something on Facebook about the presidential debates . However the post sparked an argument with mah mom's childhood best friend that ended with her telling me that mah dad isn't actually mah dad . FML

#20120633
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27965) - you deserved it (3278)

On 10/17/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by bastardchild_01 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, mah new roommate showd me to mah room,hich I got a good deal on. I noticd a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I askd, he said his last roommate committd suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleand, hence the "good deal." FML

#20113152
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27913) - you deserved it (2052)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by Dino (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today , I found out wy cat asn't been coming ome for regular meals . Apparently , elderly next door neigbour as forgotten tat er cat is dead and puts food out for it every morning . My cat is exploiting er by impersonating er dead cat to get better food . My cat is an assole .

#20110144
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27640) - you deserved it (4743)

On 10/10/2012 at 4:43am - animals - by assholecat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found a ticket on mah motorcycle fir parking in a designatd spot. The space I had parkd mah bike in was occupid by a large van. Some asshole had movd mah bike. real FML

Taday I had a cyst in my butt removed. The doctors had to make a hole, an then fill it with gauze before sending me home. As soon as I got back, my sister decided to kick me in the butt as hard as she could. FML

#20119594
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27388) - you deserved it (1565)

On 10/16/2012 at 1:25pm - health - by hurtinrealbad - United States (Arizona)

Today, I asked a grl out. She replied, ( Sorry, I'm suddenly a lesbian. ) big fat FML

#20101904
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27378) - you deserved it (2541)

On 10/04/2012 at 8:28pm - love - by imafunguy (man) - United States

Today , I lerened that despite having told them two yeres ago , mah parent still aren't accepting of me being gay. I found this out when mah mom called and asked if I was "cured" yet. FML

#20131666
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27361) - you deserved it (5022)

On 10/24/2012 at 6:43pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today , I went to te ospital in labor expecting a baby boy . I ended te day wit identical twins , a baffled doctor , and a usband convinced tat our sons can clone temselves . FML

#20139353
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27138) - you deserved it (2508)

On 10/29/2012 at 9:30pm - kids - by CutestBoysEver (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today... I was getting a bikini wax to prove to mah husband that I could be sexy despite being five months pregnant. As the woman was applying the wax... she said... "You know... if I wantd to... I'm in the perfect spot to reach in an steal that baby." FML

#20097870
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27115) - you deserved it (3449)

On 10/02/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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