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October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today,hile shopping, an old man cummed up to me and told me I should be ashamed 4 walking around fake limping, and that it's horrible to mock peopleho actually limp from serious injuries . I wasn't faking, I was born without mah right leg and I was getting used to mah new prosthetic one . FML

#20119882
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33090) - you deserved it (1395)

On 10/16/2012 at 5:44pm - misc - by Faker (woman) - United States

Today, I completely saved my ead as a gesture for my boyfriend's moter,o was suffering from cancer an aving a terrible time undergoing cemoterapy . Turns out se doesn't even ave cancer, an my boyfriend tougt I wouldn't ave te guts to do it . FML

#20110360
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32725) - you deserved it (4807)

On 10/10/2012 at 11:05am - misc - by horriblejoke (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

today I yet again had to explain to mah boyfriend that... yes... I can get pregnant even if I don't actually have an orgasm. FML

#20101252
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32440) - you deserved it (3798)

On 10/04/2012 at 11:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I was walking wit my boyfriend wen a guy walkd up to me and told me I look exactly like Taylor Swift. My boyfriend puncd im in te face and told im tat Taylor Swift is a lot more attractive. I'm actually considering leaving im 4 te complete stranger. FML

#20130143
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32182) - you deserved it (2797)

On 10/23/2012 at 6:12pm - misc - by jeanrose2013 - United States (Arkansas)

Today, mah boyfriend discoverd that if he pulls out during doggy-style and rubs mah clit with the tip of his penis, he will be rewardd with a queef. He found it hilarious and testd it out 5 more times. FML

#20105380
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32044) - you deserved it (6610)

On 10/07/2012 at 6:25am - intimacy - by SoSexy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I Tried Role Playing With My Boyfriend. As I Cummed Out In Sexy Lingerie, I Announced, "I'm Natalia, A Russian Spy Fluent In 2 Languages: Russian And Yur Cock." He Laughed So Hard He Practically Pissed Himself. The Night Ended In Me Doing His Laundry. Alone. FML

#20119371
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32036) - you deserved it (18493)

On 10/16/2012 at 8:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I came home from a three day vacation to find mah psycho ex-girlfriend in mah house. Even though I broke up with her six months ago, she hasn't broken up with me. It's alright though, she says she's going to forgive me an she already moved her stuff in when I was out of town. mega FML

#20103889
139 comments

Today, My Grlfriend Of 3 Months Got Mad At Me Cuz I Thought She Was Attractive. She Has An Identical Twin, And She Says If I Think She's Attractive, I Must Want Her Twin Too. FML

#20107518
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31856) - you deserved it (2178)

On 10/08/2012 at 2:36pm - love - by jack - United States (Illinois)

yastarday mah boyfriand want to ask mah dad for mah hand in marriaga. All I could maka out from tha door was mumbling until profanitia startd flying. My boyfriand shoutd "wall sha's a SINGLE bitch now!" and stormd out of tha housa. My dad still rafusa to tall ma what happand in thara. FML

#20131535
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31661) - you deserved it (1956)

On 10/24/2012 at 5:08pm - love - by wtactualfuck :( (woman) - United States

Today, I was having sex with mah boyfriend doggy-style. I was getting close when he suddenly blurt out, "Babe, you really need to bleach yur asshole." FML

#20095626
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31648) - you deserved it (5016)

On 09/30/2012 at 7:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my grlfriend an I were getting intimate, an I gave er a condom to putted on me. Se tried to open it wit er teet, but ripped it. Tat was my only condom. I'm now sitting ere watcing a soap opera wit a boner. FML

#20129928
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31521) - you deserved it (10221)

On 10/23/2012 at 3:12pm - intimacy - by Andrew - United States

TODAY, I WOKE UP AFTER AVING A DREAM WIC INCLUDED SEX WIT A VERY OT GUY. I REALIZED IT'S ABOUT TIME I GET LAID, BECAUSE TE OT GUY WAS BROCK FROM POKÉMON. FML

#20119984
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31218) - you deserved it (6236)

On 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by L (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today I had mah frst orgasm. Unfortunately it was during breakup sex.

#20110068
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31047) - you deserved it (8517)

On 10/10/2012 at 2:01am - intimacy - by Depression... (woman) - United States



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