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Saturday 5 July 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I woke up to my young niece hammering a metal cookie cutter into my leg. I'll have a teddy bear shaped scar for the rest of my life. FML

#21199181
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51133) - you deserved it (4896)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:40am - kids - by umerin - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and then stopped, got off, and said, "Let's go get ice cream." I think this was her way of telling me I suck at sex. FML

#21199096
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50925) - you deserved it (10517)

On 07/05/2014 at 12:26am - intimacy - by bad in the sack - United States

Today, I was on the internet playing a game. I have a speech impediment, and the guy running it told me to get off his server for making fun of disabled people. FML

#21199175
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47040) - you deserved it (3924)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:37am - misc - by Wow (man) - United States (California)

Today, a girl I recently slept with messaged me, explaining through a rendition of "Call Me Maybe" that she'd given me chlamydia. FML

#21199713
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46443) - you deserved it (14277)

On 07/05/2014 at 4:19pm - health - by Rowansgonnarow -

Today, my dad interrupted my job interview with a phone call, just to say "I fucked your mom." No shit, dad. FML

#21199559
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44583) - you deserved it (7099)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:53pm - work - by Anonymous - United States



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

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