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Monday 6 January 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML

#21019231
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55880) - you deserved it (6888)

On 01/06/2014 at 4:32pm - misc - by innocent - Australia

Today, my dog found out how to turn my Xbox off. So whenever he wants attention, guess what he does. FML

#21019316
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48819) - you deserved it (17364)

On 01/06/2014 at 6:00pm - animals - by Z3R0G5 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I realised after showering that I didn't have a towel, so I thought I would risk a naked dash to my brother's room to steal one of his. He and his friend were in the room and both agreed that I needed a "trim". FML

#21019082
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48698) - you deserved it (20204)

On 01/06/2014 at 1:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, I found out my ex boyfriend is still obsessed with me. Apparently he named his dog after me and talks to her like she's a real person. FML

#21018719
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48659) - you deserved it (5828)

On 01/06/2014 at 2:17am - intimacy - by Seriously? -

Today, I found a great recipe for dinner, and emailed it to myself with the subject "Dinner tonight". Hours later, I'd forgotten all about it, opened my emails, saw the subject line, and thought someone was asking me out to dinner. I got really excited until I saw the sender address. FML

#21019190
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45216) - you deserved it (14128)

On 01/06/2014 at 3:57pm - misc - by Mels (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that someone had peed into the bottle of Febreze that we keep in the dorm bathroom. I found this out when I sprayed it onto my coat to get rid of a weird smell. FML

#21019092
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43635) - you deserved it (4587)

On 01/06/2014 at 2:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I brought up the subject of marriage with my boyfriend. His response was to shoot me with a nerf gun and laugh. FML

#21019101
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43280) - you deserved it (8885)

On 01/06/2014 at 2:20pm - love - by CatLady - United States (California)

Today, I was painting cabinets for the children's area in my church. While painting, I dropped my brush and got black paint on a white part. I tried to wipe it off. Now there's a very visible smudge that looks like a penis. FML

#21019530
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38645) - you deserved it (7360)

On 01/06/2014 at 9:25pm - kids - by peepeepainter - United States (Georgia)



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  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

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