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Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML

#21409473
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32604) - you deserved it (2602)

On 05/13/2015 at 1:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I slipped and sprained my ankle while shopping for a present for my husband, who later came home and tripped over my elevated leg, hurting my ankle again. Now I have an excruciating sprain, and a spouse who's furious at me because "I shouldn't have tried to surprise him." FML

#13502195
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22766) - you deserved it (2601)

On 10/18/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while on my run, I was attacked by my neighbor's new dog. It apparently didn't like me running past their house and broke free from its chain. I now have stitches and was just told that I'm probably being taken to court for the emotional distress I caused her and the dog. FML

#13397431
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35766) - you deserved it (2601)

On 10/10/2010 at 8:57pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my drunken father decided to walk my quiet street naked. FML

#14671104
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28188) - you deserved it (2601)

On 01/22/2011 at 5:05am - misc - by meeeoow (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I attended my extended family's Christmas dinner. All throughout, my grandmother kept complaining about how the food tasted like crap, and making sexual remarks such as how "the stuffings were far better in my day, if you know what I mean." FML

#18608467
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23745) - you deserved it (2601)

On 12/25/2011 at 3:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, after I requested a sick day, a very close co-worker texted her boyfriend that I'm a bitch for pretending to have the same rare illness that she recently suffered. She said it was unlikely, disrespectful and unfair that I didn't even look sick. I know this because she texted me instead. FML

#20037042
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24516) - you deserved it (2601)

On 08/23/2012 at 3:56am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His father was completely wasted, his mom was high, and his 11-year-old sister was talking about her favorite alcoholic drinks at the dinner table. FML

#21335369
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32291) - you deserved it (2601)

On 01/11/2015 at 9:41pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to explain to my rabidly religious brother how two transvestites can buy fish at Petco while he's buying the same fish at the same Petco, and it doesn't equate to hitting on him. It's been two hours, and he's still sitting outside my door reading Bible verses and praying aggressively. FML

#21392651
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29667) - you deserved it (2601)

On 04/12/2015 at 10:51pm - misc - by mademoiselle meurtre (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, after a discussion, my boyfriend said, "I think it's time you found somebody better." After I gave him a look, he continued, "For me." FML

#21394512
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28875) - you deserved it (2601)

On 04/16/2015 at 3:59am - love - by Marona (woman) - Croatia (Grad Zagreb)

Today, while working as a carhop at Sonic, my roller skates ran over some gravel and I fell, causing me to drop a tray of food. I found out later that one of the customers had deliberately done that to see if I would trip. FML

#13925294
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32366) - you deserved it (2600)

On 11/21/2010 at 1:44pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my friend spilt orange juice all over my iPad. She then went ahead to clean it off by rinsing it with water. FML

#20187648
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26732) - you deserved it (2600)

On 12/02/2012 at 5:16am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, I went to get a scratch off lottery ticket, and the dude in front of me got the same one I was going to get. He won 500 dollars. I got 2 bucks. FML

#1615
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22177) - you deserved it (2599)

On 01/18/2009 at 2:12pm - misc - by steveinnewsoh - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend told me she was over her addiction and wished to quit cold turkey. I cancelled all my plans to stay home and support her. She didn't mean her tobacco addiction, no no. Her corn chip addiction. FML

#20005444
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22685) - you deserved it (2599)

On 08/06/2012 at 7:20am - misc - by Spockx - New Zealand (Waikato)



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