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Today, I got to say, "My best friend hooked up with my step-sister's grandma's aunt" and be correct. FML

#18465565
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25750) - you deserved it (2287)

On 12/09/2011 at 12:22am - love - by thatisnotcool45 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend accused me of cheating, because I tipped our waitress at dinner. FML

#20186136
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26058) - you deserved it (2287)

On 12/01/2012 at 12:59am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, while at my boyfriend's house waiting for him to shower, his mother slams a pair of underwear on the table and tells me that if she ever finds something like that in her son's room again, she is forbidding him from seeing me. The underwear isn't mine. FML

#3756487
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55111) - you deserved it (2286)

On 07/14/2009 at 8:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my future mother-in-law gave me advice on life. One piece of advice was that I should leave her son. FML

#17925802
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26548) - you deserved it (2287)

On 10/07/2011 at 2:41am - love - by andy1r (woman) - Bolivia (El Beni)

Today, I took my Spanish exam. One of the questions was to translate "Mark is lazy and antisocial." My name is Mark. Everyone kept giving me weird looks the whole test. FML

#21316211
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29020) - you deserved it (2286)

On 12/12/2014 at 1:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out I have sodium fluoride poisoning. Apparently, my water has a high level of sodium fluorine. I've been drinking much more water lately trying to be healthier. FML

#21313951
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29924) - you deserved it (2286)

On 12/08/2014 at 6:23pm - health - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, a creepy old guy kept hitting on me in line at Subway. I got scared and told him to back off because my dad was waiting for me outside. He replied that he wouldn't object to a three-way. FML

#21352037
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33895) - you deserved it (2286)

On 02/08/2015 at 11:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was trying to get my car out of my boyfriend's apartment garage but couldn't. Why? Because somebody decided to park in front if the garage door and have sex. Complete with steamed windows and loud noises. FML

#7771404
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17097) - you deserved it (2285)

On 02/01/2010 at 2:31am - intimacy - by ocroyalty (woman) - United States (California)

Today, on my first day of work, my new boss treated me to lunch. Thinking she was really nice, I thanked her for the treat. She fixed me with a cold, unsmiling stare and said, "Oh, don't thank me. I'm being paid to do this." FML

#13967011
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23359) - you deserved it (2285)

On 11/24/2010 at 9:32pm - work - by niceboss (woman) - Singapore

Today, I found out that I have to reschedule my upcoming honeymoon because my office will be understaffed that week, due to the boss going on vacation right after my wedding. Oh, yeah, and he's in my bridal party. FML

#14738244
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23924) - you deserved it (2285)

On 01/27/2011 at 11:24pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I've gotten the most calls of my life. Turns out the idiot who changed the sign on my local pizza hut put up the wrong phone number. My phone number. I've already received 16 calls. FML

#17568217
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25321) - you deserved it (2285)

On 08/24/2011 at 1:14pm - misc - by Marty - United States (Michigan)

Today, I took the train to visit my parents, which arrives late at night. As I was getting off, the cute guy in front of me looked out the window, then turned to me and said, "Doesn't that guy out there give you the creeps?" That guy was my dad. FML

#17996578
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29341) - you deserved it (2285)

On 10/16/2011 at 6:36am - misc - by DaddysGirl (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to drive to my workplace in blizzard conditions. Now that my 12 hour shift is over, I can't get out of the building, as the snow has blown into large drifts in front of the doors. I have to stay overnight until my next 12 hour shift. FML



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