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Today, my crackhead neighbour got slightly annoyed at my 2-day-old daughter's late-night wailing. Well, I think so, anyway, as she politely requested us to "SHUT THAT CUNT KID UP." or she would "BLOW BOTH OUR HOUSES UP, YOU FUCKING ASSFUCKS." But I'm not 100% sure. FML

#21417851
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31486) - you deserved it (2853)

On 05/29/2015 at 11:51pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my life became a lot more depressing. A while ago, some friends and I founded a "Forever Alone" club, because all of us were single at that time. I'm now the only member left. FML

#21481449
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24646) - you deserved it (2853)

On 10/18/2015 at 1:06pm - love - by Lena (woman) - Germany

Today, I was mugged on my way to the bus stop. With no money or mobile I started to panic about the exam I had and ran the 3.5 miles to get to there. When I staggered up to the building only 20mins after the exam started, the university staff wouldn't let me sit it as I couldn't prove my identity. FML

#3022587
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58022) - you deserved it (2852)

On 06/19/2009 at 4:22am - misc - by verrine - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, being a music student, a professional orchestra performed a symphony that I wrote and dedicated to my girlfriend. It took months to compose and it the first and only time it was ever going to be played. My girlfriend forgot to come. FML

#5890926
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49288) - you deserved it (2852)

On 10/19/2009 at 1:34am - love - by Ryanissaur (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was at the gas station pumping gas when the lady in front of me had a little boy who asked if he could pump the gas. She said yes and then quickly answered her phone, as it was ringing. She wasn't watching him and he pulled out the pump to early, spraying gas all over me, including my face. FML

#9092499
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33749) - you deserved it (2852)

On 03/15/2010 at 12:34am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, the company I applied for called up congratulating me in getting the job. I was ecstatic. Quickly enough I texted a few mates that I'd got the job. Twenty minutes later they called again saying the trainee had accidentally called the wrong applicant. FML

#14786523
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32735) - you deserved it (2852)

On 01/31/2011 at 10:44am - misc - by kkkk -

Today, the student council gave us our senior class t-shirts. Our theme this year is "Striving for Excellence." Excellence was misspelled. FML

#17975485
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26046) - you deserved it (2852)

On 10/13/2011 at 3:27pm - misc - by brit (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my business is doing so badly that people are teaching their kids to drive in the empty parking lot. FML

#18565836
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33766) - you deserved it (2852)

On 12/20/2011 at 10:18pm - work - by Thomas - United States (South Carolina)

Today, after days of being too sick to leave my house, I went to get some medicine. While picking out cough drops, an old man leaned over and said, "You smell quite delicious today". I haven't showered and the only "perfume" I'm wearing is VapoRub. FML

#21374151
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29175) - you deserved it (2852)

On 03/13/2015 at 11:52pm - health - by minty - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I somehow got into the conversation of what the weirdest thing we have ever found in food was. She said she found paper in her fortune cookie; she was serious. FML

#21406274
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30355) - you deserved it (2852)

On 05/07/2015 at 3:52pm - misc - by Random737193 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boss called me into her office to tell me I needed to mind my own business and not question everything my newest co-worker does. Yesterday, I stopped the new girl from giving $6,000 to the wrong person. I was fired on the spot. The new girl was promoted into my job. FML

#6400678
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41574) - you deserved it (2851)

On 11/22/2009 at 2:31am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, it was both my and my stepmother's birthday. In preparation, my dad bought a huge banner with my stepmother's name on it, and a lovely birthday cake. When I told him it was also my birthday, he just grunted and taped a post-it note to the banner with my name on it. Same with the cake. FML

#14853922
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40876) - you deserved it (2852)

On 02/05/2011 at 3:30pm - misc - by stinkerweeder (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my date mugged me, just minutes after I paid our bill at the restaurant. FML

#21320485
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35850) - you deserved it (2851)

On 12/19/2014 at 6:27pm - money - by j4 - United Kingdom



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