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Today, my mom explained the benefits of douching to me with my boyfriend right there. He began arguing with her about how the vagina is usually self-cleaning. FML

#7263265
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17449) - you deserved it (2036)

On 01/10/2010 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by CD (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend asked me to marry him because he could get a tax cut from buying the ring. All of this happened in front of his mother. FML

#7804669
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21488) - you deserved it (2035)

On 02/02/2010 at 1:20am - love - by engagedmaybe (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I rang my dad to tell him and my half-sister that I'm finally engaged. I then asked my half-sister to tell my stepmother. Still on speaker, I heard her run upstairs and pass the good news on. My stepmother responded with 'Cery who?', followed by 'So what? I can't stand her'. I'm Cery. FML

#7376584
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27733) - you deserved it (2035)

On 01/16/2010 at 11:29am - misc - by ThatCery (woman) - United Kingdom (St. Helens)

Today, I finally felt well enough to take an actual shower after having surgery on my back. It took five minutes to stand up, ten minutes to get to the shower, and another ten minutes to get in. The pilot light went out in less than five minutes. FML

#14732721
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22985) - you deserved it (2035)

On 01/27/2011 at 3:24pm - misc - by brrrr that's cold! - United States (Colorado)

Today, the girl I have a crush on texted me to go out tonight. When I got to her house, she peered at me quizzically and asked, "What do you want? Did I text you?" FML

#19007190
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28661) - you deserved it (2035)

On 02/06/2012 at 12:35am - love - by hudd357mag (man) - United States

Today, a girl said to me, "Sorry, but I have a boyfriend". I hadn't said anything to her. FML

Today, I've been diagnosed with a severe lung infection. This causes me to viciously hack up a lung every two minutes or so. Not only can I barely breathe as it is, my job requires lots of running around, cleaning and interacting with customers. I have a five-hour shift tonight. FML

#19529513
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20636) - you deserved it (2034)

On 04/25/2012 at 9:27pm - health - by MissMae93 (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that Nyquil has such an amazing effect on me, that it won't even allow me to wake up to go to the bathroom. FML

#20084489
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19670) - you deserved it (2034)

On 09/23/2012 at 1:03am - health - by Nyquilwtf - United States

Today, I was at work and a lady screamed at my manager for about 15 minutes, saying I needed to be fired because I couldn't get rid of all the flies buzzing around her food. She was the one who chose to eat on our patio. FML

#21285397
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30805) - you deserved it (2034)

On 10/26/2014 at 1:17am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to explain to my 14-year-old sister why one must not wear the same pair of knickers for a week. FML

#8754431
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25495) - you deserved it (2033)

On 03/01/2010 at 7:14pm - health - by :( - United Kingdom (Blackpool)

Today, I parked my car to go inside to grab my wallet than I'd forgotten. In the short time it took me to do that, someone broke two of my car's windows. FML

#9018628
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19242) - you deserved it (2033)

On 03/12/2010 at 7:10am - misc - by lance - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's my 21st birthday. My parents' gift was a case of non-alcoholic beer, to "prepare" me for when I "turn 21." My parents can't even remember how old I am. FML

#18177670
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29804) - you deserved it (2033)

On 11/06/2011 at 7:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I had eight teeth removed in preparation for getting my braces fitted. My winter break will now consists of barely being able to sleep or eat, tasting blood, and looking like a goofy-ass chipmunk. FML

#19900081
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20969) - you deserved it (2033)

On 07/06/2012 at 1:11pm - misc - by Julie is in pain (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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