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Today, my roommate decided to fry some bacon. After finishing, he thought it would be easy to clean up if he just tossed the panful of grease out the second story window. Guess where I was standing at the time? FML

#6147856
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34154) - you deserved it (2082)

On 11/04/2009 at 5:12am - misc - by burned (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was on Craigslist looking for a new guitar. I found the diamond earrings and necklace set I gave to my girlfriend last year. She wants 50 bucks for them. FML

#7821879
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25636) - you deserved it (2082)

On 02/02/2010 at 7:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, at work, I handed an old man his drink, and our fingers accidentally brushed. He gave me a creepy wink and a smile, but I ignored it. He's now been sitting in the store for two hours watching me. Only 4 hours to go until I get off. FML

#13950658
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23501) - you deserved it (2081)

On 11/23/2010 at 3:53pm - work - by Username -

Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML

#18234990
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27623) - you deserved it (2080)

On 11/13/2011 at 3:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up to an email confirming my membership to a dating site. Turns out my mother is as annoyed by my loveless life as I am. FML

#19708728
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19127) - you deserved it (2080)

On 05/31/2012 at 7:29am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I found out that my Mom had taken out a loan out on my car from the repo man taking my car away. FML

#4712863
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26965) - you deserved it (2079)

On 08/21/2009 at 4:44pm - money - by jonhapimp (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, it was our one year anniversary. After a surprise re-creation of our first date, we went home, in the mood for love. The food poisoning from the restaurant had a different idea. FML

#18694109
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27370) - you deserved it (2079)

On 01/03/2012 at 3:14am - love - by snarly1 - United States (California)

Today, I realized just how messed up my life is, thanks to all the scare stories my wife sees on Dr Phil. She's now convinced that I'll start beating her someday. She's started taking martial arts classes, and threatens to use her skills every time I get even slightly frustrated with her. FML

#20029819
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24491) - you deserved it (2079)

On 08/19/2012 at 12:00pm - love - by yarhyun1 (man) - United States

Today, while visiting my widowed great aunt, she took out her wedding rings and talked about the love she and my uncle had. Smiling, I told her that one day I hope to have as happy a marriage as theirs. Her response? "Knowing you, I wouldn't count on it." My mother sat there agreeing. FML

#20189035
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19385) - you deserved it (2079)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:17am - misc - by Stupendous_ - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out my happily married father has been hiring escorts on-line for 3 years. FML

#7517323
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17011) - you deserved it (2078)

On 01/23/2010 at 7:21am - intimacy - by T.C (woman) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, while at work, I was asked to see my boss. I was informed that the company would be laying off 20 people, and that I was one of them. I was told I could finish off the week, then was sent back to work. Twenty minutes later, my boss walked around and handed us all Christmas party invitations. FML

#13598783
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22375) - you deserved it (2078)

On 10/26/2010 at 2:35am - work - by robthebuilder (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out I have to give my father-in-law back the football tickets he gave me for my birthday. Why? His girlfriend decided she wanted to go. He didn't get me a different gift. FML

#18434015
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23912) - you deserved it (2078)

On 12/05/2011 at 1:57am - misc - by Sal (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that guys will only flirt with me when they're drunk, and even then only when they realize that my best friend is out of their league. FML

#20093311
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19545) - you deserved it (2078)

On 09/29/2012 at 7:16am - love - by kfenton - United States



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