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Today, I was in the bank with my seven year old daughter, when I saw an old high school friend of mine with his wife. I said hello, and he commented on how beautiful my little girl was. I thanked him, and as I turned away, I heard his wife say "I guess the father must be the good looking one." FML

#187755
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53085) - you deserved it (2330)

On 03/02/2009 at 7:36pm - misc - by lexibabe (woman) - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 4 years. Her response? First, she threw up all over me and then she started crying hysterically. I'll take that as a no. FML

#6267863
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32903) - you deserved it (2330)

On 11/12/2009 at 12:36am - love - by youmakemesick - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was walking with a friend after buying two cups of steaming hot coffee. While crossing the busiest street in town I tripped and fell, spilling the coffee all over me. My friend didn't notice I fell right in front of her and tripped over me spilling her coffee on me as well. FML

#8528184
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20228) - you deserved it (2330)

On 02/21/2010 at 8:31pm - misc - by burnnnnn (woman) - Ecuador (Azuay)

Today, my family and I are sitting in our house while Hurricane Sandy is going on. My grandma is freaking out because she believes it's our recently deceased dog Sandy getting revenge for putting her to sleep and getting a new dog. FML

#20138973
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26073) - you deserved it (2330)

On 10/29/2012 at 5:45pm - animals - by With_Love929 - United States (New York)

Today, I helped my friend, who is a slob, move out of my house. I found the source of the funky smell she's been complaining about, under her bed. It was her vibrator. I found it with my bare hands. I had to bleach my hands twice and I still don't feel clean. FML

#20081199
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32071) - you deserved it (2330)

On 09/20/2012 at 8:05pm - intimacy - by MistressSuzuka (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was running to the bus stop to catch the bus. The bus driver smiled, waved, and drove away without letting me get on. FML

#7793
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31665) - you deserved it (2329)

On 02/04/2009 at 11:06am - misc - by seriously?? - United States (Florida)

Today, it's "family fun night." We're pulling weeds. FML

#18894486
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23043) - you deserved it (2329)

On 01/23/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by Suzie Leone (woman) - United States

Today, I found out why it might be awkward to have your plumber and your least well-behaved dog share a name. Bad plumber. FML

#20100991
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18128) - you deserved it (2329)

On 10/04/2012 at 2:20am - animals - by acme - Israel

Today, it's my 30th birthday. I was having a great night until I overheard my mother say, "I can't believe that thing made it to 30." FML

Today, I found out the person who's been stalking and harassing me online was actually my now ex-boyfriend. He only confessed as I finally picked up the phone to report it to the police. He basically said he wanted me to turn to him for comfort and protection, so he could "feel like a man". FML

#21323138
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30637) - you deserved it (2327)

On 12/24/2014 at 7:03am - misc - by jflac (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was at home and my boyfriend called me and said that I'd left my G-string at his house. I only have one G-string and I was wearing it. FML

#5825697
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28928) - you deserved it (2326)

On 10/14/2009 at 5:20am - misc - by flipraff101 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out my bank account was in the negative because my work gave me a check that didn't clear. I went to my bank to get a statement of charges so my job could reimburse me. They told me requesting a statement costs 8 dollars, which I don't have because my account is in the negative. FML

#7591885
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25594) - you deserved it (2326)

On 01/26/2010 at 4:33pm - money - by tinaburrito - Sent from mobile version

Today, some of my classmates brought cupcakes to celebrate my birthday. I took the leftovers with me after class, and when my mom picked me up from school, she asked, "What are the cupcakes for?" FML

#14542119
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29574) - you deserved it (2326)

On 01/11/2011 at 4:17am - misc - by bdayboy (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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