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Today, I had to clean up the urine puddle left by one of the regulars who plays the poker slot machines at the bar where I work. Rather than reserve the machine to go to the bathroom, she literally sits in her own piss to mark her territory. This happens about every second day. FML

Today, after my shower, I went to clear off my fogged-up mirror. Doing so, I noticed a handprint on it. I compared it to my hand, but it was much too small. I live alone. FML

#21292770
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35671) - you deserved it (2186)

On 11/05/2014 at 3:44pm - misc - by spooked - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my mother found a hickey on my neck. Not believing that it was from the hungry 2-month-old child I was holding, she confronted my boyfriend about it. He promptly accused me of cheating. FML

#20086696
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24097) - you deserved it (2185)

On 09/24/2012 at 3:09pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my two best friends decided to boycott Valentine's Day, ditching their boyfriends to hang out together. Not only am I single, but I wasn't invited. FML

#43145
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35340) - you deserved it (2183)

On 02/14/2009 at 6:14pm - misc - by Noname - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my husband and I moved to get closer to his job. Today he got transferred 150 miles away from where we moved to. FML

#13297410
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25070) - you deserved it (2183)

On 10/03/2010 at 12:00am - love - by liz - United States (West Virginia)

Today, after months of telling my parents I was going to live on my own, I finally moved out. Not even 24 hours being out of their house, some reject burned down the apartment complex I live in. Guess who's moving back home. FML

#17853037
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30251) - you deserved it (2183)

On 09/28/2011 at 1:17am - misc - by Foreverathome - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother, her fiancé, and I were having dinner together. My mother was joking that she wasn't sure she could hold him down, as he used to "get around." She turned to talk to the waiter and my future step-father looked me up and down and winked. FML

#18279508
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32403) - you deserved it (2183)

On 11/18/2011 at 6:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was worried about my brother because he said that his new medication was making him hallucinate. I told him he should see a doctor right away. He said it was fine and that he had already seen a doctor. I later found out the doctor he was talking about was a hallucination. FML

#19536164
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23428) - you deserved it (2183)

On 04/27/2012 at 4:22am - health - by PickedOff (woman) - United States

Today, I got home from work, and saw a note on the counter my roomate left saying "Sorry about the basement." I then went into the basement, and found that it was flooded. My TV, Xbox360, mini-fridge, and couch were all destroyed. Good thing he tried to stop the leak with scotch tape. FML

#4856467
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42873) - you deserved it (2182)

On 08/27/2009 at 7:51am - misc - by buzzzzkill (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up with a cordless drill on my bed. The one I lent my neighbour last week. FML

#7606861
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26354) - you deserved it (2182)

On 01/27/2010 at 2:41am - misc - by Brummsta (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I called my wife to tell her I finally found a job after 6 months. A man answered the phone claiming to be the cable guy. We cut our cable off when I was laid off 6 months ago. FML

#6584948
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35205) - you deserved it (2182)

On 12/03/2009 at 3:13pm - love - by SatelliteUser (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, a woman stopped me and started chewing me out for wearing a pentagram necklace. I explained to her that is wasn't a pentagram, it was a Star of David. She continued chewing me out because apparently that still means I hate Jesus. FML

#20097322
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21952) - you deserved it (2182)

On 10/01/2012 at 8:11pm - misc - by raz (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, after three and a half years of working dead-end jobs with a bachelor's degree, I got a call from a potential employer in my degree field, who wanted to set up an interview. The problem: the interview is across the country, and I'm too broke to pay the travel expenses. FML

#20498605
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28523) - you deserved it (2182)

On 02/08/2013 at 7:19pm - work - by goingnowherefast (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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