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Today, I worked overtime with three guys who never shut up about partying and getting laid. When I finally escaped the testosterone and got home, the first thing I heard was my grandpa telling my dad all about how he once fisted a girl to orgasm. FML

#20023096
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24845) - you deserved it (1805)

On 08/15/2012 at 6:52pm - intimacy - by what the FUCK (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was forced to listen and politely nod with a smile on my face, as my boss droned on and on, explaining that everything in the universe is slowly getting bigger, aside from him, because he's never felt so short before. FML

#19802218
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15452) - you deserved it (1805)

On 06/17/2012 at 3:38pm - work - by Megan (woman) - United Kingdom (Neath Port Talbot)

Today, a cyclone hit my city. Though everywhere else is flooding, my house is fine. Well, that was until the toilet decided to overflow and regurgitate the entire town's sewerage. So now my only bathroom is covered in sewage, and I can't go anywhere else because of the flooding. FML

#20481750
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26201) - you deserved it (1805)

On 01/27/2013 at 6:47pm - health - by shitday - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was given a $25 gift certificate for being Employee Of The Week. The gift certificate was 6 months past its expiration date. FML

#13326388
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22778) - you deserved it (1804)

On 10/05/2010 at 3:43am - work - by The Lone Ranger - United States

Today, I saw my mom changing the expiry date on milk. She genuinely thought this would make the milk sour later. FML

#19759587
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24116) - you deserved it (1804)

On 06/09/2012 at 9:54am - health - by WTF (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, the guy I have been seeing left town to visit his family for three weeks. A few hours later, he called me from the airport to say he is never coming back. FML

#20076048
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22410) - you deserved it (1804)

On 09/17/2012 at 10:15am - love - by jlee0000785 (woman) - Australia

Today, I received my best compliment of the year so far when an ER doctor commented positively on the clarity of my urine sample. FML

#19992508
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16441) - you deserved it (1804)

On 07/30/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the man I went on a date with a few weeks ago finally called me back. I was his "one phone call" from prison. FML

#19980162
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20055) - you deserved it (1803)

On 07/23/2012 at 7:06pm - love - by Rose (woman) - United States

Today, while eating lunch, one of my friends told a joke that made everyone at the table laugh. Apparently, the guy standing behind me overheard and was laughing too. So much in fact that he spewed the red Gatorade he was drinking all over the back of my white shirt and hair. FML

#12977321
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21073) - you deserved it (1802)

On 09/09/2010 at 2:05pm - misc - by gatorhead - United States (Georgia)

Today, I woke up early and went to the dermatologist's, only to have them tell me that the skin condition I have that causes big, white spots to appear is chronic and I can do nothing about it. But they did give me cream for a different skin condition they found. FML

#13953523
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18453) - you deserved it (1802)

On 11/23/2010 at 8:40pm - health - by Username - United States

Today, I found a wallet containing an ID card. I managed to track down the owner, who now is threatening to call the police if I don't return the 400 dollars that he insists were also in it. FML

#18577886
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27118) - you deserved it (1802)

On 12/22/2011 at 7:04am - misc - by JackSteely -

Today, I confronted my mom about her drinking problems. After I blurted everything out, she completely denied it. She did this as she was drinking a huge cup full of vodka. FML

#18627824
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22754) - you deserved it (1801)

On 12/27/2011 at 7:48pm - misc - by fgbh456 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I brought my best friend to my uncle's birthday party. We were having a great time until my grandmother walked up to us and said to me, "You sure have a nice looking boyfriend." My friend is a girl. She has cancer and lost all of her hair due to chemotherapy. FML

#8690586
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35059) - you deserved it (1801)

On 02/27/2010 at 2:03pm - health - by hairplease (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



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