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Today, I was having a nice conversation with my fiancé when he said out of nowhere, "I sold some of your panties". I thought he was joking so I said I hoped they weren't any of my favorites. He wasn't joking, though, and now some stranger from Craigslist owns my panties. FML

#21317090
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30367) - you deserved it (2782)

On 12/14/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by konacoffee17 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got a call from my roommate's mother, asking me to hide her flip flops so she couldn't wear them out in sub-zero temperatures. FML

#21327005
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27901) - you deserved it (2782)

On 12/30/2014 at 4:57am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I was talking to my fellow coworker about how nervous I was about sleeping with this guy I really liked. She's been constantly giving me advice about him for months, but today she said "Oh don't worry, he isn't that good in bed anyway." FML

#6293770
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20255) - you deserved it (2781)

On 11/13/2009 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by taurus05 (woman) - United States

Today, I was on the bus, it hit a bump on the road and made me hit a elderly man. The bus driver thought I did it on purpose and made me get off. FML

#15147269
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27085) - you deserved it (2781)

On 02/28/2011 at 1:00am - misc - by Parade (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went on a blind date. All my date would talk about was how he was 'really his own best friend.' FML

#18614469
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23167) - you deserved it (2781)

On 12/26/2011 at 7:11am - love - by SoccerBabe42 (woman) - Canada

Today, I discovered my son, who has recently moved out of our home, eating his dog's food. His excuse? He wanted the new Pokemon game, and "compromises had to be made". FML

#20122132
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22052) - you deserved it (2781)

On 10/18/2012 at 4:33am - kids - by anon - Australia

Today, I walked in on my mom drenched in tears, barely able to speak. I ran to get her some tissues and a nice cup of tea to calm her down. After a few minutes of sitting in silence, I asked her if she wanted to talk about what happened. She watched an episode of Gossip Girl. FML

#20491267
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28517) - you deserved it (2781)

On 02/03/2013 at 4:58am - misc - by wetqueefa (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband decided it was time to tell me he had a 3 year old son. We have been married for 5 years. FML

#5389483
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51064) - you deserved it (2780)

On 09/21/2009 at 5:35am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my neighbor scolded me for "allowing" her son to be bitten by one of my dogs. This would be reasonable, except for the fact that her kid had jumped my fence and tried to steal a rattle out of my daughter's hands. FML

#21133303
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42741) - you deserved it (2780)

On 05/07/2014 at 3:16pm - kids - by Arthur - United States

Today, after Thanksgiving dinner, we all played Cards Against Humanity. On one round, I was the dealer, and I received "foreskin" as a card. When I said this, my grandmother told me that apparently, after my ritual circumcision, my grandfather buried my foreskin under our rosebushes. FML

#21307273
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28476) - you deserved it (2780)

On 11/28/2014 at 12:25am - misc - by mainlineloser (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I met a great girl at a party. We talked alone, and she made me promise I'd dance with her later. When I saw her later, she was unconscious, and in an ambulance. She'd collapsed, and the entire party assumed I'd spiked her drink. FML

#3502786
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50720) - you deserved it (2779)

On 07/05/2009 at 11:58am - love - by curiousorange (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was working at Tim Hortons. A lady was in line, and she couldnt make up her mind. 20 minutes later she finally decided to get something, and she reached in her pocket. I was hoping it was a tip, but she gave me a coupon for a haircut. FML

#6125529
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24864) - you deserved it (2779)

On 11/02/2009 at 8:15pm - misc - by justin_99 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, we had our first rainstorm in weeks. Thirty seconds before it started, my window broke in the "down" position from overuse, since last week the air conditioning in my car gave out. Now I have a hot, wet car. FML

#12431823
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21609) - you deserved it (2779)

On 08/10/2010 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)



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