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Today, I invited a girl I really like to spend the afternoon at my place. Everything went great... with my sister. They became really good friends, and me, well, I tried to alleviate my boredom in front of my computer. FML

#717
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18279) - you deserved it (2185)

On 01/06/2009 at 4:51am - love - by [SiMON] - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up to find my garage broken into and my car covered in paint and with the words "F*** you". Why? I broke up with my ex because she cheated on me and stole money off me and my mom. Apparently this wasn't a good enough excuse to break her up with her. FML

#6229163
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34277) - you deserved it (2185)

On 11/09/2009 at 3:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

Today, I got food poisoning and have had the worst diarrhea ever. I laid down in bed, hoping to get some rest when my dad thought it'd be a good idea to sneak into my room and scare the shit out of me. Literally. FML

#8910408
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31594) - you deserved it (2185)

On 03/08/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by itsEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my best friend came over for dinner and a movie. Moments after arriving, she spent an hour on the phone, and ended up accepting another invitation before leaving. I guess it's dinner for one tonight. FML

#14686261
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23911) - you deserved it (2185)

On 01/23/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Username - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was dumped by my boyfriend. He claimed that it's because he's an agent fighting the Mafia, and he doesn't want to put my life at risk through reprisal attacks. FML

#20045057
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20661) - you deserved it (2185) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/27/2012 at 6:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend decided it would be cute to leave a love letter in my car while I was at work. She left my lights on. I got a dead battery. FML

#20179747
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21687) - you deserved it (2185)

On 11/26/2012 at 1:59pm - love - by Blake Lawrence - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out that my neighbor gets more pleasure out of me and my husband having it off then I do. FML

#8382778
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15534) - you deserved it (2184)

On 02/17/2010 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by noosher0990 -

Today, I had to clean up the urine puddle left by one of the regulars who plays the poker slot machines at the bar where I work. Rather than reserve the machine to go to the bathroom, she literally sits in her own piss to mark her territory. This happens about every second day. FML

Today, minutes before I walked down the aisle at my wedding, my drunk mother stumbled up to me and told me she was depressed and wanted to leave. FML

#20897339
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37116) - you deserved it (2184)

On 09/26/2013 at 9:32pm - misc - by notnow - United States

Today, I found out that I have been declared dead by my credit card company in England because I haven't used it since I moved to Thailand last year. I will need three witnesses to convince them that I am actually alive. FML

#7167765
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26865) - you deserved it (2183)

On 01/05/2010 at 7:02pm - money - by Arsinoe (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, my drunk mother got into a fight with the lady at Krystal burger. Why? "Because the bitch said they aren't making special orders." FML

#8085656
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19752) - you deserved it (2183)

On 02/10/2010 at 10:10am - misc - by Krit - United States

Today, my husband and I moved to get closer to his job. Today he got transferred 150 miles away from where we moved to. FML

#13297410
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25005) - you deserved it (2183)

On 10/03/2010 at 12:00am - love - by liz - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I went to Walmart to pick up some groceries. When I came out, the front end of my car was crushed in. On the window was a note only saying "Sorry I bumped into your car." FML

#17839244
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28411) - you deserved it (2183)

On 09/26/2011 at 1:18pm - money - by This Guy - United States



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