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Today, an old lady fell in the street, and I rushed to help her. As I tried to help her to her feet, she started screaming, "She pushed me! She pushed me!" I froze up in shock, and ended up being chased by some guy who thought I'd attacked her. FML

#21149185
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38184) - you deserved it (2758)

On 05/23/2014 at 12:00pm - misc - by notgoodwitholdpeople - Singapore

Today, after a day, I finally noticed that the toilet paper I'd been using to wipe my butt is actually a roll of paper towel cut in half. My dad thinks that it's a waste of money to buy proper paper. Guess who had to unclog the toilet twice. FML

#21350771
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28625) - you deserved it (2758)

On 02/06/2015 at 3:26am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up and realized I have experienced my first "nocturnal emission". I am a 24 year old male who has been married for 3 months. Guess who isn't getting any. FML

#7025515
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17029) - you deserved it (2757)

On 12/29/2009 at 11:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I took my girlfriend of 3 years out to where we had our first date. I proposed to her. She breaks down in tears as she tells me she's been sleeping with her co-worker for the past year. FML

#13052175
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50781) - you deserved it (2757)

On 09/14/2010 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by ohno - United States

Today, I went to a blood drive. The nurse taking my blood mentioned that she'd been called in on her day off, and she swore she wasn't drunk. I didn't know what to do, so I just smiled and blinked back tears as she savaged the vein in my arm. FML

#19466370
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21665) - you deserved it (2757)

On 04/14/2012 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I made the mistake of telling my dentist that my dog died. She spent the next half-hour talking about her pets and how they died. I ended up crying in her dentist's chair. FML

#20045592
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20239) - you deserved it (2757)

On 08/28/2012 at 12:43am - animals - by anonya - United States (California)

Today, I found out the can of spray paint I got at Walmart yesterday has no spray nozzle, rendering it useless. I'm working on a project that needs to be done by the weekend, so I get to go wait in a huge line and risk being trampled to death tonight just to exchange one damn spray paint can. FML

#20174445
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19644) - you deserved it (2757)

On 11/22/2012 at 9:56pm - misc - by Unfortunate Painter - United States (California)

Today, I casually mentioned to my mom that my boyfriend of two years and I were thinking about moving in together. She looked me dead in the eye and said if I ever moved out, she'd throw me out of the house. I'm confused. FML

Today, I picked up an extra shift at the store. It was also the day the store's ventilation system shut down, resulting in carbon monoxide poisoning for me and two co-workers. FML

#21230314
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39233) - you deserved it (2757)

On 08/05/2014 at 6:44pm - work - by cutthroatkait (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML

#6131025
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39607) - you deserved it (2756)

On 11/03/2009 at 2:24am - love - by whysheheartless (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, while in heavy traffic on the highway, a motorcyclist managed to t-bone my car. He picked himself up, glanced at the side of my car, and quickly drove off, all in the space of a few seconds. I just got an expensive paint job on this thing. FML

#17778728
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23444) - you deserved it (2756)

On 09/19/2011 at 4:35am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, my dad has been hitting the bottle, and will only respond to anything I say in a slurred rap. FML

#20539367
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28241) - you deserved it (2756)

On 03/11/2013 at 10:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, our band had a road trip. Two people chose to stack themselves on top of each other to share a seat rather than sit in the last seat next to me. FML

#21326846
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27435) - you deserved it (2756)

On 12/29/2014 at 11:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)



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