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Today, I received a marriage proposal at work from a 70 year old man covered in dirt from head to toe, who offered to be my "sugar daddy." I guess I have options after all. FML

#13742971
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25936) - you deserved it (2814)

On 11/06/2010 at 8:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, the heat rash that has been devouring my side for the last week was revealed to be something much worse: shingles. FML

#17300096
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31573) - you deserved it (2814)

On 07/29/2011 at 5:40pm - health - by ivannooze - United States

Today, my mother won't give me any painkillers for my migraine. She believes that "When medicine goes into your stomach, the acids stop the medicine from working" and that "It's all in people's heads when medicine works". FML

#16847494
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32218) - you deserved it (2814)

On 06/25/2011 at 8:58am - health - by Live02Dance - United States (Virginia)

Today, it started pouring while I was in the middle of a pizza delivery. I had to stand out in the rain for ten minutes while an old redneck dude wearing nothing but camo boxers fumbled around for the exact change to pay the bill. I think seeing his junk was supposed to count as my tip. FML

#17310535
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32040) - you deserved it (2814)

On 07/30/2011 at 4:02pm - intimacy - by womboman - United States

Today, I learnt there's a woman who comes into my store only to hear my Barry White-like voice. My boss knows who it is, yet refuses to tell me because it's "hilarious." I'm now cautious of every customer. FML

#18950332
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20526) - you deserved it (2814)

On 01/30/2012 at 4:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I finally reached the point where it became necessary to give my boyfriend an ultimatum: either clip your toenails, or we aren't having sex. FML

#21405555
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28913) - you deserved it (2814)

On 05/06/2015 at 8:50am - love - by anon - United States (Kansas)

Today, I met a new guy at work who would not stop hitting on me. We ended up on a six hour shift together watching a pool, so we were wearing nothing but bathing suits when he began grabbing me inappropriately. When I confided in my female coworker about it, she told me he was her husband. FML

Today, my fiancé called me 'thick' for not realising he'd been sleeping with his ex earlier. FML

Today, my soon to be mother-in-law sent me a birthday present. It was a necklace for me to wear at my wedding. The pendant is a well known lesbian symbol. I'm a woman and I'm marrying her son. FML

#5392687
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37878) - you deserved it (2812)

On 09/21/2009 at 12:32pm - love - by whasian (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, on my last break, a lady comes up to me and asks if she could have a hug because I reminded her of her daughter that died in a car accident 3 years before. Touched, I called my mom to let her know that I loved her. Before I could tell her, she said it was probably a scam and hung up on me. FML

Today, I was at the store when I saw that a cart in the checkout line next to me was starting to roll away and the owner hadn't noticed. I tried to help by reaching out to stop the cart from moving, but when the owner saw me with the cart, she began to hit me for trying to steal her purse. FML

#4481809
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37725) - you deserved it (2812)

On 08/12/2009 at 6:43pm - misc - by NoticeTheLackOfNumbers (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was eating breakfast at an IHOP. As I was eating, the old man sitting directly behind me started discussing every aspect of his spastic colon, in vivid detail. FML

#14809738
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22549) - you deserved it (2812)

On 02/02/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a guy who I have known for a long time confessed his love to me. It would have been sweet except that he will become my stepbrother in 3 days. FML

#15124689
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34448) - you deserved it (2812)

On 02/26/2011 at 9:03am - love - by welcometothefamily - United States (Georgia)



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