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Today, I led a class of grade-two pupils on an excursion to the zoo. When we went to see the lions I was put in a position where I had to explain to seven and eight year olds why one lion was "bouncing" on top of the other one. FML

#20477486
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30418) - you deserved it (2714)

On 01/25/2013 at 12:25am - kids - by teacher - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I discovered that the "dish soap" my sister uses to clean our dishes when it's her turn, is actually a semi-toxic floor cleaner. FML

#20661400
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39126) - you deserved it (2714)

On 05/13/2013 at 7:05pm - misc - by emmingle - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was yelled at once again for being in the school gym without a coach present. I am the coach. FML

Today, I woke up, only to find my Xbox missing. Thankfully I have a security camera discreetly wired up in the tree on my lawn. Checking the tapes, I saw my brother park outside my house, let himself in with his spare key, then drive off with my missing equipment. FML

#21303975
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31519) - you deserved it (2714)

On 11/22/2014 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, the heat rash that has been devouring my side for the last week was revealed to be something much worse: shingles. FML

#17300096
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30396) - you deserved it (2713)

On 07/29/2011 at 5:40pm - health - by ivannooze - United States

Today, I met my new dentist. His teeth are worse than mine. FML

#17863482
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26429) - you deserved it (2713)

On 09/29/2011 at 1:20pm - health - by Vxale (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I watched from my office window as a couple maneuvered their car to squash a dead pigeon flat on the road. I then watched as they got out of the car, set up tripods and started taking photos of it. FML

Today, as I was walking home, a friend passed me by on his moped, and sprayed a bunch of silly string at me. Unfortunately, he hit me in the eye, temporarily blinding me. As I stumbled around blind, I accidentally knocked a bunch of 3 year olds off their bikes, causing them to cry. FML

#5812873
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28312) - you deserved it (2713)

On 10/13/2009 at 6:09am - misc - by sillystring (man) - China (Beijing)

Today, I walked out to my car to see a broken window, a bunch of stuff missing, egg shells, and a note that read "stop banging my boyfriend". I haven't had anyone in over a year. FML

#4325647
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55804) - you deserved it (2712)

On 08/06/2009 at 1:28am - love - by gkline09 - United States

Today, I called my mom for her birthday. She started talking about an infomercial she'd seen for a combo bidet-and-dryer, and how she would like to get one so she can feel "fresh down there" without worrying about getting bits of toilet paper on her nether regions. I can't un-hear this. FML

#13415843
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24780) - you deserved it (2712)

On 10/12/2010 at 1:46am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend whom I'm crazy about broke up with me out of the blue. After pleading with her unsuccessfully, I called my mom for comfort and advice. She informed me that my dog had died. FML

#14461663
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39479) - you deserved it (2712)

On 01/04/2011 at 9:49am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML

#19072659
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35807) - you deserved it (2712)

On 02/14/2012 at 9:29am - love - by Illinoisgirl - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, a client stared at me in disbelief after I mentioned that I had a boyfriend. FML

#19129542
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23719) - you deserved it (2712)

On 02/21/2012 at 4:53am - work - by kat (woman) - Reserved



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