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Today, I overheard my parents discussing whether or not they could trust me being alone in the house for 2 days. They then came to the decision that I'm too unpopular and unattractive to ever throw a wild party or get laid. FML

#7156329
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34922) - you deserved it (3004)

On 01/05/2010 at 12:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because apparently my mom hates him and doesn't want us to be together. My mom died six years ago. FML

#17019799
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47493) - you deserved it (3004)

On 07/07/2011 at 9:28pm - love - by anonbob (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my sister attacked me and stuffed a Tic Tac up my nose. I'm currently in the hospital waiting to have it removed. FML

#18738638
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31886) - you deserved it (3004)

On 01/07/2012 at 7:33pm - health - by tictacnose - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while waiting for a doctors appointment, my husband started playing angry birds. Continually losing the game ended up raising his blood pressure to the point where he now has to have his medication changed. The new medication is $100 copay. FML

#17588910
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27133) - you deserved it (3004)

On 08/26/2011 at 8:20pm - health - by Username - United States

Today, I was working at my day-camp, and one of my little boys told me he had to show me something important. He proudly showed me that he'd crapped his pants. I had to wipe his ass clean. FML

#19039920
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24119) - you deserved it (3004)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:51am - kids - by ilana (woman) - United States

Today, my friend and I told each other about our boyfriends. They're both nice, kind, beautiful, talented, funny, sweet and smart. They also both have the same name. And house. And job. And car. FML

#20196037
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45135) - you deserved it (3004)

On 12/08/2012 at 5:44am - love - by ouch. - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, my boss told me that my attitude to work is awesome and that he'd follow my example of coming in half-an-hour early every day from now on. I relish those 30 minutes as the only time I can get work done without him constantly interrupting me. So much for that. FML

#20919859
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44165) - you deserved it (3004)

On 10/14/2013 at 6:38am - work - by Karansuni (woman) - Germany

Today, my psychotic, very jealous ex-boyfriend appeared out of nowhere and punched a male store clerk who was helping me look for azaleas in a garden center. FML

#21264094
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36519) - you deserved it (3004)

On 09/23/2014 at 9:19pm - love - by Tag (woman) - Australia

Today, my allergies flared up and I started sneezing. I guess my girlfriend was having a bad day, because she lost her shit and started telling me how annoying I am and how I can never do anything right. I'm not sure if we're still a couple, because she stormed out and won't answer my calls. FML

#21270617
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36332) - you deserved it (3004)

On 10/04/2014 at 11:17am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark

Today, I tried to download some network-monitoring software for the office as I suspect that one of my staff has been constantly downloading torrents. It wouldn't download because someone was using all the bandwidth. FML

#21282944
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29727) - you deserved it (3004)

On 10/22/2014 at 4:09am - work - by Thewatcher (man) - Mauritius

Today, my father finally achieved his long-held goal. He has legally disowned me. FML

Today, I was leaning under a counter to get my girlfriend her favorite snack food out of a low cabinet when she decided it would be funny to poke me while I was in an awkward position. I jerked up, rammed my head on the bottom of the counter, and ended up at the ER with staples in my head. FML

#2907307
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45792) - you deserved it (3003)

On 06/15/2009 at 7:40am - misc - by bronzemedal97 (man) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, one of my best friends went into labor 14 days early. I'd told my boss previously about this and that I need to be there for my friend as she doesn't really have any family. My boss will not let me leave work to be there. Why? I didn't give enough notice. FML

#5660811
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36652) - you deserved it (3004)

On 10/05/2009 at 11:45am - kids - by musicalkitcat (woman) - United States (New York)



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