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Today, I met my sister's fiancé. I would have been happier for her if he hadn't been mine a month ago when I introduced them. FML

#21301904
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40744) - you deserved it (3052)

On 11/19/2014 at 3:27am - love - by MissAggravared - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was walking around the park with my wife. Out of nowhere, a little girl on a bicycle slammed in to me, knocking me to the ground. As I rolled over, sure that my ankle was broken, her father ran over to me. He screamed, "Watch where you're going, douchebag!" FML

#3107443
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62532) - you deserved it (3051)

On 06/22/2009 at 12:11am - kids - by Al (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I told her best friend the plan the day before. I got reservations to a restaurant on the beach, and we were going to arrive via boat. She never showed. Her parents called me asking why she left town to go to Paris. FML

#6926336
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34638) - you deserved it (3051)

On 12/24/2009 at 6:37pm - love - by hoplessG (man) - United States

Today, my friend told me I'm not welcome in her house anymore. I've spent the last two months painting and doing it up for her, because she's pregnant and couldn't herself. I just finished the job. FML

#11640890
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36851) - you deserved it (3051)

On 07/03/2010 at 7:25pm - misc - by Sapphirlinda (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I took a nap because I've been sick for the past week and I was exhausted. When I woke up, my hair, shirt, pillow, and bedsheets were soaked. I threw up all over myself in my sleep. FML

#14095720
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33021) - you deserved it (3051)

On 12/05/2010 at 1:25pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, while I was waitressing, two girls ran up a tab of $60 in drinks. They ended up not paying the bill and walking out. My boss told me it won't be the first time or last, as he made me pay their bill. FML

#17145541
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32157) - you deserved it (3051)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:00am - work - by sfabsits - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was chatting to a nice girl at the mall, and I said if she didn't get a raise, I would write to the management. She said they have no email address, and I replied that I meant an actual letter. "Like, on paper?" she said, "Damn, how old are ya, pops?" I want a ticket off this planet. FML

#19276990
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25189) - you deserved it (3051)

On 03/14/2012 at 11:17am - misc - by S. Michaels (man) - United States

Today, a guy said to me, "I'd really love to see that smile back at my place." Trying to be cute, I asked him if he was single. He replied with, "No, but I am a dentist. I could definitely fix that crossbite." FML

#20003299
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23154) - you deserved it (3051)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:23am - health - by wut (woman) - United States

Today, my son told me he needed a haircut. I was thrilled that he actually requested it, since he normally throws a fit over getting them. He described the cut he wants. It's a mullet. FML

#19523693
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25727) - you deserved it (3051)

On 04/24/2012 at 7:59pm - kids - by DaveAlmighty (man) - United States

Today, I was woken up by my teenage son pulling down my shirt and taking pictures of my breasts. FML

#20124963
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36720) - you deserved it (3051)

On 10/20/2012 at 4:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I helped my brother propose to his girlfriend of 5 years in the spot where they had first met. As he delivered his heartfelt speech, a sizable crowd appeared. When he got down on one knee, she punched him in the gut, yelled, "I never loved you", and ran away. Now he won't talk to me. FML

#20887080
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48505) - you deserved it (3051)

On 09/18/2013 at 9:45pm - love - by ElizaZee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I spent my day alone while my parents and siblings were at school and work. Trying to be helpful, I cleaned out the fridge, did 5 loads of laundry, worked outside, fed the pets and made dinner for the entire family. The evening was spent hearing complaints of how wrong I did everything. FML

#6878679
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38370) - you deserved it (3050)

On 12/22/2009 at 2:01am - misc - by sadcinderella (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I discovered that the rancid stench in my bathroom was a decaying carcass of a mouse in my toilet tank. FML

#7876927
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24431) - you deserved it (3050)

On 02/04/2010 at 1:53pm - misc - by Ewwwwww - United States



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