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Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. I said yes. This caused him to panic, excuse himself, then take it back via text message a half hour later, claiming he'd been drunk. We live together. When he comes back home, it's going to be very awkward indeed. FML

#20541052
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37766) - you deserved it (2746)

On 03/12/2013 at 6:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw a customer wandering around, looking confused. I went over and kindly asked if I could help him find anything. He said no, but that he'd help me find the teeth he'd knock out of my mouth if I didn't get lost. FML

#21248418
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34394) - you deserved it (2746)

On 08/30/2014 at 11:14am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend of a year because I discovered she had been cheating on me. Her defense was, "It wouldn't be a problem if you were just OK with this." FML

#13946366
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32604) - you deserved it (2745)

On 11/23/2010 at 4:32am - intimacy - by anonymous -

Today, things started to heat up in the bedroom. Not in a sexual way, though; the lamp caught fire. FML

#19349740
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26739) - you deserved it (2745)

On 03/26/2012 at 5:11am - intimacy - by pmek - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend's transition into an annoying hipster is complete. It started with the not-really-necessary nerd glasses and the Mötley Crüe t-shirt, the final straw being the affected British accent. I'm considering where to dump the body. FML

#20086118
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24238) - you deserved it (2745)

On 09/24/2012 at 1:07am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, the two and a half hours it took our poorly air conditioned taxi to go 20 miles in stop-and-go traffic was highlighted by our son projectile vomiting all over my wife, a suitcase, and the car. It ended with me having to pay both for the ride, as well as for cleaning the inside of the taxi. FML

#3834940
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36426) - you deserved it (2744)

On 07/17/2009 at 4:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, I finished a fence around my house that I have been working on all week. About an hour after I finished, a water company truck pulled into my driveway. They told me they would have to take down my fence to make repairs on a water pipe. FML

#3854269
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43829) - you deserved it (2744)

On 07/18/2009 at 10:23am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, my co-workers agreed that I was the one causing the elevator to be over its weight limit. When I protested, saying that I only weigh around 150 pounds, one asked me if that included the weight of my wheelchair. They made me get out. FML

#17861695
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39456) - you deserved it (2744)

On 09/29/2011 at 3:34am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to blow-dry the sweat off her armpits instead of showering. FML

#19454762
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23633) - you deserved it (2744)

On 04/12/2012 at 8:51am - misc - by crazydaughter - Egypt

Today, my brother had a party with over 60 people in my basement. It turns out that five different couples had sex under the same comforter. The comforter was mine. FML

#19923012
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31446) - you deserved it (2744)

On 07/11/2012 at 9:29am - intimacy - by Sherry - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my nitwit son infected our family computer with some sort of mad bastard virus after getting fooled by the promise of some non-existent Hannah Montana nudes. FML

#20076697
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23242) - you deserved it (2744)

On 09/17/2012 at 7:25pm - kids - by StupidBerk (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my mother thought it would be a good idea to tell me that I was conceived on an airplane toilet. FML

#18728247
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31420) - you deserved it (2743)

On 01/06/2012 at 6:16pm - intimacy - by Gemma - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, the battery cables on my car came loose, thus resetting my car's electronics to factory settings. The anti-theft system is now turned on, and I can't start my car with it on. Luckily, it turns off with a remote. The remote broke about six months ago. FML



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