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Today, I found out that the reason my best friend is not allowed over anymore is because he hits on my mom and writes her love letters. FML

#13259037
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26000) - you deserved it (2080)

On 09/30/2010 at 1:11am - misc - by Bestfrienduncool - Sent from mobile version

Today, I met my girlfriend's family. Her mother wants us to stay in separate bedrooms, and I was happy to oblige since I'm staying at their house. But because there isn't an extra room, we have to stay together. Upon entering the house, her mom searched our bags for condoms and birth-control pills. FML

#18341424
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25330) - you deserved it (2080)

On 11/24/2011 at 9:09pm - intimacy - by vistingherfamily (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, a girl who's in charge of a group project that I get graded on, asked if Bill Gates was a Founding Father. She was totally serious. I'm screwed. FML

#20900504
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35749) - you deserved it (2080)

On 09/29/2013 at 1:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to see my grandmother. She has alzheimers and doesn't remember me sometimes, and today she thought I was her sister and that I was trying to steal my grandfather from her. She hit me with a cane and called me a slut. FML

#3603925
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48152) - you deserved it (2079)

On 07/09/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by lady_jeni - United States (California)

Today, my mother and aunt got into an argument about who had gotten groped more times in public. I don't know what's more disturbing, that my own mother would brag about getting groped, or that she won the argument, at 34 times. FML

#17374758
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25016) - you deserved it (2079)

On 08/05/2011 at 3:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my daughter told me that she wanted to convert to a Christian. Not because she has a strong relation with God, but because she wants to post Facebook statuses about Him and "get a lot of likes." FML

#20131695
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18489) - you deserved it (2079)

On 10/24/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, the police searched my house because my neighbors thought we were aiming a gun with laser sight at them. We were only getting our daft dog to chase a laser light around; we don't even own any guns. FML

#20117729
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17740) - you deserved it (2079)

On 10/15/2012 at 4:33am - misc - by triple l (woman) - United States

Today, while sitting in a waiting room, a man assured me "The safety's on" after he handed his kid his BB gun. A minute later, I practically had a hole in my foot. FML

#20160435
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16309) - you deserved it (2079)

On 11/12/2012 at 1:12pm - health - by Emily - United States (California)

Today, while on the train to university, I realized it was my stop and quickly stood up to get off. Or I would have, if my leg hadn't gone to sleep and caused me to fall, landing face first into the crotch of the old guy in front of me. FML

#19373619
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18627) - you deserved it (2078)

On 03/29/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by LassieToe (woman) - Australia

Today, during the countdown to midnight, I looked for my girlfriend so I could kiss her as 2013 began. I found her just in time to see her making out with some guy she swore was "only a friend." FML

#20435586
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38675) - you deserved it (2078)

On 01/01/2013 at 2:50am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend decided it would be fun to sit on my lap. In the process he landed on me so hard that he made me hit my head. Then when he turned around his elbow smacked into my nose causing it to break. FML

#14530558
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20734) - you deserved it (2077)

On 01/10/2011 at 5:35am - health - by dinosaur - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got hit in the face at a dodge-ball tournament. My entire mouth was bloody. The sad thing is, I wasn't even playing. FML

#18316587
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20446) - you deserved it (2077)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:53pm - health - by haileyjunkin -

Today, my brother decided to join me on my first date. Not only did he answer the door with a bat, he also got inside the car and sat next to my date, pushing me to the back. He stayed the entire time, and walked me back to the house. My mom laughed and gave him $20. It was a dare. FML



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