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Today, I went to get my friend a drink while she sat in the lounge watching TV with my dog. When I came back, I found her licking my dogs ears. She said he dared her to do it. FML

#7540376
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26350) - you deserved it (2981)

On 01/24/2010 at 7:28am - animals - by CheeseMonsters (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I helped a "blind" man across the street. He kindly said thank you and patted me on the back. Then, I went into a store and realized my wallet was missing. FML

#8840238
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25993) - you deserved it (2981)

On 03/05/2010 at 2:50am - misc - by whyymee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that my fiancé had responded to an online missed connection posting. He has been emailing, exchanging pictures and making plans to go out with this girl. We are supposed to be married in the fall and just put down the non-refundable deposit on our reception site. FML

#9183586
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31009) - you deserved it (2981)

On 03/18/2010 at 9:49am - love - by anon17 - United States

Today, I found out my daughter has a higher paid job in the same company I work in. I also found out she is dating my boss. FML

#14160788
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31252) - you deserved it (2981)

On 12/11/2010 at 12:10am - work - by Anonymous - Indonesia

Today, I had to bury my horse again because coyotes keep digging it up. FML

#19230527
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40186) - you deserved it (2981)

On 03/06/2012 at 11:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, while my mother-in-law visited, I asked if she wouldn't mind watching my son for 10 minutes as I had run out of baby shampoo. I came back home to see she had shaved his head completely bald. That was his very first haircut. FML

#20494705
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36027) - you deserved it (2981)

On 02/05/2013 at 5:48pm - kids - by missedout (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I'm in the process of adopting a child. When I called my mom to tell her the news, she just said, "Oh honey, don't adopt, it's the worst decision you'll ever make." I'm adopted. FML

#21110479
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47507) - you deserved it (2981)

On 04/11/2014 at 5:58pm - kids - by babylove - South Africa

Today, my mother told me that she and my father aren't coming to my wedding if my estranged brother who stopped talking to me two years ago isn't invited. She claims they don't want to choose sides. Brother: 1. Me: 0. FML

Today, I have dark hairs growing on my chest, nipples and stomach... I'm a 19 year old girl. FML

#841
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31945) - you deserved it (2980)

On 01/02/2009 at 1:06pm - health - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was working as a cashier at my job. A guy came up with a cart full of stuff and it took me 10 minutes to ring it all up. When I told him his total, he felt his pockets, said "Oh shit I forgot my wallet!" and walked away. He left about 15 bags worth of things for me to put back. FML

#4219084
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42683) - you deserved it (2980)

On 08/02/2009 at 12:04am - misc - by drano - United States (California)

Today, I went to the movies. Not only did the movie end up being awful, but I came to my car to find out someone drew Squidward from "SpongeBob" with large letters spelling "I LIKE POTATOES!" on my windshield. In permanent marker. FML

#6298224
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28850) - you deserved it (2980)

On 11/14/2009 at 6:08am - misc - by squidwardpotatoes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while shopping with my mother, she handed me a frozen turkey to put in the cart, but ended up swinging it into my nuts instead. I feel like a giant battered eggplant, and I think I'm now impotent. FML

#8774277
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19886) - you deserved it (2980)

On 03/02/2010 at 2:57pm - health - by beateneggs - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was going over to my friends house for dinner, (it was my birthday) when I walked in everyone yelled surprise and then turned on the lights. When my friend looked over at me she said "wrong person guys, turn off the lights". FML

#240271
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57641) - you deserved it (2979)

On 03/08/2009 at 3:16am - misc - by PmS (woman) - United States (Wyoming)



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