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Today, I have a cold, and was stuck sleeping in bed. My roommate decided to wake me up by sticking headphones in my ears and playing heavy metal on full volume. This is the third time this week. FML

#20049664
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18298) - you deserved it (2109)

On 08/30/2012 at 4:34pm - health - by shadowsorel - United States (Illinois)

Today, my long term boyfriend took me to my favorite restaurant. After the main course he knelt down and finally proposed to me. I was so happy I almost cried. Until an old woman came over and said I was way to old for him. I'm 3 years younger than my fiancé. FML

#7481282
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31730) - you deserved it (2108)

On 01/21/2010 at 7:14pm - love - by walkingonsunshine - Sent from mobile version

Today, my doctor told me that the reason I'm losing my eyesight is because I'm straining my eyes, and that the best thing for me to do is to limit my time in front of computers. I spent years in college to get my current job which involves sitting in front of computers. FML

#18111169
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22686) - you deserved it (2108)

On 10/30/2011 at 12:31pm - health - by comedybreak - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm. FML

#19594950
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25066) - you deserved it (2108)

On 05/08/2012 at 10:05pm - intimacy - by laury - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend and I had the weekend all to ourselves. On the second day, we finally got intimate, with me doing all she asked of her. In return for hard-work, she took my meat in her hand and started making lightsaber noises, before pronouncing "I don't see why people like it so much." FML

#5876001
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12776) - you deserved it (2107)

On 10/18/2009 at 7:29am - intimacy - by Ignitingmylightsaber (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML

#7212033
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27685) - you deserved it (2106)

On 01/08/2010 at 2:23am - kids - by PeanutlyDisabled - France

Today, MS Word kept crashing with a memory error, so I called tech support. Instead of actually fixing the problem, their tech wasted over an hour of my time defragmenting the hard drive, disabling the anti-virus, and downloading new video card drivers from some shady site, before giving up. FML

#18283702
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17698) - you deserved it (2106)

On 11/18/2011 at 7:48pm - work - by I quit (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my brother and I were shoveling mulch. He pushed me in and then ran away, laughing hysterically. I was stuck in the mulch, and no one would help. I was literally in deep shit. FML

#19528720
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18234) - you deserved it (2106)

On 04/25/2012 at 7:08pm - misc - by horselover7766 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it hit me that my dad didn't cry when I moved out, he did so only when I came back later to pick up my cat. FML

#6761317
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19591) - you deserved it (2105)

On 12/15/2009 at 3:50am - animals - by number2 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my apartment got robbed. My 'book-in-progress' should keep them company. FML

#14703374
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18477) - you deserved it (2105)

On 01/24/2011 at 10:18pm - misc - by brokenhome - United States (Texas)

Today, I drove 45 min from my college to surprise my girlfriend with roses after she got off work. She responded by taking the roses, dumping them in her back seat, and speeding off because she couldn't miss Survivor. FML

#18550642
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22788) - you deserved it (2105)

On 12/19/2011 at 1:44am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really like. He brought up that there was a person staring at us from a nearby table. That person was my mom. FML

#18692571
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31010) - you deserved it (2105)

On 01/03/2012 at 12:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I applied for a job as a dishwasher. I was denied because I don't have enough experience. FML

#17903490
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23754) - you deserved it (2105)

On 10/04/2011 at 12:18pm - work - by SimpleSwimmer - United States (California)



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