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Today, my wife made up her own theme song for when she pees in the shower. FML

#20056463
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19237) - you deserved it (2608)

On 09/03/2012 at 10:08pm - misc - by weave9z (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was looking through pictures on Facebook. There was a picture of me and my friends with the caption "I love you guys!" below. I had been cropped out. FML

#7056009
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28002) - you deserved it (2607)

On 12/31/2009 at 11:52am - misc - by MorganRox26 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went shopping with my mother, when someone snuck a pack of condoms into our cart while our backs were turned. When we got to the register, my mom, whose wealth makes me ineligible for financial aid, noticed the condoms and she announced that she wasn't paying for the college I got accepted to next year because she doesn't want a promiscuous daughter. FML

#8557043
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28388) - you deserved it (2607)

On 02/22/2010 at 4:13pm - misc - by condiments - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend, the girl I completely love, is now dating my father. She tried giving me the "I know I'm not your mother..." speech. FML

#17823429
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51973) - you deserved it (2607)

On 09/24/2011 at 7:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had to sit in the hospital with my 88-year-old grandfather by myself. During the five hours I was there, he insisted on sharing the intimate details of his many sexcapades that he has had since World War II. FML

#19375039
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22104) - you deserved it (2607)

On 03/30/2012 at 7:32am - intimacy - by kawood (woman) - United States

Today, my mother decided to share with me that my father is impotent, and they hadn't had sex in a year and a half. Thanks, Mom. I can never unhear that. FML

#19864219
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23102) - you deserved it (2607)

On 06/29/2012 at 1:31am - intimacy - by Christina (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "our priorities aren't the same." Her priorities turned out to be getting into my coworker's pants. FML

#20969114
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40495) - you deserved it (2607)

On 11/24/2013 at 2:59pm - love - by bsulyingb (man) - United States

Today, while looking through a stack of possible pictures for Facebook, I found one I really liked, until I noticed that I have recently developed a bald patch. Problem? I am a 22 year old woman. FML

#6408288
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27505) - you deserved it (2606)

On 11/22/2009 at 5:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I was called gorgeous for the first time in 4 years. By a robot. A female robot. Who was trying to sell me cosmetics. FML

#9015781
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21927) - you deserved it (2607)

On 03/12/2010 at 1:36am - misc - by gorgeousgirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while at work, a woman left her credit card at my register. I tried to return it before she left. Seeing her getting into her car, I jogged after her and yelled, "Wait." She ran over my foot. FML

#10488066
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28092) - you deserved it (2606)

On 05/12/2010 at 4:07pm - work - by ab1e - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my boss told me I'm not working hard enough because I take French classes two mornings a week and therefore I won't be getting a promotion. If I want the promotion I have to stop taking my French classes. These are the same French classes I was told I originally needed for the promotion. FML

#16044188
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36035) - you deserved it (2606)

On 05/04/2011 at 1:29pm - money - by French - Switzerland (Vaud)

Today, my sister confessed to me that she sold some of my old shirts to the girl who's stalking me. This explains why I got a note that read, "I have your scent, now I can track you." FML

#16965226
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40992) - you deserved it (2607)

On 07/03/2011 at 8:27pm - misc - by beablue18 - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, I was at my grandparents' house, when the power went out. Even though we were supplied with candles and flashlights, we still had to stumble around in the darkness. They'd left both the candles and flashlights in the pitch black, unnavigable basement. FML

#17654474
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19509) - you deserved it (2606)

On 09/03/2011 at 4:52pm - misc - by itsgonnabealongnight... (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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