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Today, my boss delivered some flowers and a sympathy card signed by everyone in the office to my cubicle. The card said, "Sorry your mom died". My mom isn't dead. I don't know where they got the idea from and no one believes me. They said that denial is part of grieving. FML

#21204205
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47332) - you deserved it (3395)

On 07/09/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by ninnang - United States (Hawaii)

Today, at work, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head on my cash register. A second later, I heard roaring laughter from the security room, followed by someone saying to play it back. I'd almost convinced myself it wasn't about me, when one of the guys came out and gave me a thumb up. FML

#21349710
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35819) - you deserved it (3395)

On 02/04/2015 at 2:28pm - work - by fxck (woman) -

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by showing up at my work and proposing to me. It was sweet until an angry customer bitched us out for "wasting her time." FML

#20141262
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28334) - you deserved it (3394)

On 10/31/2012 at 2:18am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while driving my grandma home from a family dinner, I had to pull into a gas station, because my tank was almost empty. She became convinced that someone would kidnap her while I went to pay, and eventually threatened to blow us up by tossing her lighter at the gas pumps. FML

#20648219
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45544) - you deserved it (3394)

On 05/07/2013 at 6:13pm - misc - by fuckingjesusgran (man) - Bosnia and Herzegovina (Federation of Bosnia and Herzego)

Today, I had a family get-together for my birthday. I got to watch all my family members get piss-drunk and argue over who's having the worst time. FML

#20971273
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40425) - you deserved it (3394)

On 11/26/2013 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I began taking a French language class. After completing and submitting some homework, I got a response. A response that was completely in French. I can't understand shit. FML

#21471290
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20703) - you deserved it (3394)

On 09/22/2015 at 12:31am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I came home on leave from a 7 month deployment to Iraq. I wanted to see my girlfriend today, but she needed to spend time with her sick grandmother. As it turns out, her sick grandmother and my cousin are the same person. FML

#4467234
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60381) - you deserved it (3393)

On 08/12/2009 at 2:01am - love - by FUSMC (man) - United States (California)

Today, my sister and I got into an argument at a tennis court which ended up with her trying to run me over in the parking lot. I stepped to the side and hit her door, denting it. My parents expect me to pay for the damage caused by my sister trying to kill me. FML

#13357466
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31850) - you deserved it (3393)

On 10/07/2010 at 7:37pm - misc - by toyotasmash - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's mom's house for the first time. They had a cook-out so I got to meet his whole entire family. I went into the kitchen to find a huge picture of his ex-girlfriend on his mom's fridge. FML

#11163519
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38324) - you deserved it (3393)

On 06/13/2010 at 3:48am - love - by Yup (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my 70 year old grandma was yelling at me to take a pregnancy test, in the middle of Walmart. I'm 16, still a virgin and haven't had a boyfriend since I was 13. FML

#14693370
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36566) - you deserved it (3393)

On 01/24/2011 at 12:11am - intimacy - by andifalls -

Today, I made plans with an old friend that I haven't seen in years. We agreed to meet at a diner and I told him I'd be standing outside. I watched him pull up, look right at me, then do something with his phone. Seconds later, I got a text saying "Sorry, but I'm busy today and can't make it." FML

#15130627
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36443) - you deserved it (3393)

On 02/26/2011 at 8:56pm - misc - by Angela (woman) - United States

Today, a woman called my work and accused me of having an affair with her husband, my coworker, demanding that my boss discipline me. I don't know her, I barely know her husband, and I haven't had sex in months. FML

#15680012
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40767) - you deserved it (3393)

On 04/07/2011 at 1:30pm - intimacy - by kharrington - United States (Connecticut)

Today, a total stranger on the bus called me hideous and threw a soda in my face. I only asked him if the seat next to him was taken. FML

#17048924
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35454) - you deserved it (3393)

On 07/10/2011 at 2:03am - misc - by ugly (woman) - United States (New York)



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