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Today, my roommate informed me that one of her scorpions is loose in our apartment again. Great. FML

#17895796
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31131) - you deserved it (3017)

On 10/03/2011 at 1:58pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML

#20668592
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47237) - you deserved it (3017)

On 05/17/2013 at 5:25am - misc - by Jololol - United States

Today, I was refereeing a soccer match and I called a foul. An angry coach kept screaming at me, saying "You're crazy!" I asked him to leave the field. As he left, he lifted his middle finger and screamed, "FUCK YOU!" I ref 5-year-olds. FML

#20937864
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44046) - you deserved it (3017)

On 10/29/2013 at 12:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got a email from my boss. He said he was going to have to let me go for missing so much work over the last week. I was laid off two months ago. I don't know what is more depressing, getting fired from a job twice or the fact it took two months for them to notice I wasn't there anymore. FML

#1189537
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60988) - you deserved it (3016)

On 04/21/2009 at 11:11am - work - by laxguy23 (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was the only employee at a video store where I work when it got robbed. After crying, shaking and spending two hours and dealing with the police, my boss called and told me it was good experience and I would know what to do next time, then made me finish my shift, the night shift, alone. FML

#6550040
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41040) - you deserved it (3016)

On 12/01/2009 at 11:17am - work - by HP_22 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML

#20071956
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26188) - you deserved it (3016)

On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was at my in-laws' house, and as I was walking to the living room I had my hands on the back of my hips supporting my back. My mother-in-law told me to stop because it makes me look pregnant. I'm 9 months pregnant. FML

#20912417
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49712) - you deserved it (3016)

On 10/08/2013 at 12:30pm - misc - by she knows - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I got stung by a bee. On my eyelid. I'm allergic so it's swollen up so much, I can't even open my eye. Tomorrow is the first day of a new prestigious school. I either have to go to school wearing an eye-patch or walk around looking like a monster. FML

#4478482
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44828) - you deserved it (3015)

On 08/12/2009 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Kobenhavn)

Today, one of my friends pointed out I'm starting to get a mustache! - "You're finally a man!" To bad it's my 15th birthday, and I'm a girl. FML

#7897193
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27821) - you deserved it (3015)

On 02/05/2010 at 1:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boss scheduled a staff breakfast at a swanky new restaurant for all the hard work we've been doing. The dining area is on the roof, and the building has no elevator. I've been in a wheelchair for 11 years. When I brought this to my boss's attention, he said it wasn't his problem. FML

#16267088
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49089) - you deserved it (3015)

On 05/20/2011 at 1:59pm - work - by jayc80 (man) - Bermuda (Hamilton)

Today, my dad awkwardly asked me how to selectively clear his browser history. Apparently, my mom discovered his browsing habits and tore him a new one for looking at "nothing but vile smut". FML

#16606089
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26798) - you deserved it (3015)

On 06/11/2011 at 2:37am - intimacy - by dadisgoatboy - Switzerland (Aargau)

Today, I found that there is nothing worse than coming home to a snake slithering across your kitchen floor. Except when it disappears into your cabinets. FML

#17391644
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27453) - you deserved it (3015)

On 08/06/2011 at 10:49pm - misc - by Tim (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boss made me give a presentation to several senior company officials about the serious financial losses our division has made this year. Barely an hour later, my boss had palmed all the blame off onto me and gotten me fired. FML

#20605914
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38005) - you deserved it (3015)

On 04/19/2013 at 8:16pm - work - by unemployed (woman) - El Salvador (San Salvador)



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  • It's the weekend so let's plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time. Sorry, I was channelling Bill Hicks there. I'll start again. Hi everyone, how are you doing? This week…

Friday 29 May 2015

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