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Today, I was given the ultimate ultimatum: either I suffer excruciating stomach pains and remain a hostage to the porcelain whirlpool goddess, or I stop taking pain medication and face the wrath of a raging infection in my jaw. FML

#14743566
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26336) - you deserved it (2699)

On 01/28/2011 at 2:26pm - health - by Damn.... (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I finally made the last payment on the beautiful engagement ring I bought and proposed with - two years ago. To my ex-girlfriend, who said no and promptly started sleeping with one of my friends. FML

#18940800
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32660) - you deserved it (2699)

On 01/29/2012 at 4:55am - love - by brokeandsingle - United Kingdom (York)

Today, my mother-in-law said I wasn't the type she expected her son to marry, as he's always dated cheerleaders and model types. I must have looked offended, so she added, "I mean they weren't smart like you." So, I might be smart but I'm the ugliest girl my husband has ever been with. FML

#19879190
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23455) - you deserved it (2699)

On 07/02/2012 at 1:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, in math class, I got an answer "wrong." The teacher yelled at me, then he realized that my answer was correct. Then he yelled at me for not correcting him. FML

#13375159
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30034) - you deserved it (2698)

On 10/09/2010 at 4:22am - misc - by jessii - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years called my house even though I was with him at the time. He needed to talk to my mom. He asked her to break up with me for him. FML

#12655431
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28316) - you deserved it (2697)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:05am - love - by justmylife (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I realized that the bird I supposedly heard during the night throughout my childhood is actually the sound my mom makes when she comes. FML

#20160628
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38796) - you deserved it (2697)

On 11/12/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by Heather - United States (Maryland)

Today, I woke up to find my face all red and swollen. Turns out it is caused by the medication I’ve been taking for over a week now. Only in very rare cases it will cause redness on your skin. I’m glad to know I’m special. FML

#5974097
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25784) - you deserved it (2696)

On 10/24/2009 at 1:14pm - misc - by sexyswollen (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I was sitting on the toilet with a really bad and noisy stomach upset. Then I hear a knock on the bathroom door. My boyfriend had decided to make a surprise visit. FML

#14821107
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26316) - you deserved it (2696)

On 02/03/2011 at 12:33am - health - by Kay -

Today, I was choosing my soft drink at a restaurant. The kid in front of me was too short to reach the lids so I handed him one. His mom rushed over, pried it out of his hands, threw it away, and yelled, "She's filthy, don't use that." FML

Today, I had been trying to text my girlfriend all day, but no reply. After a while, I became worried so I called. She picked up and said, "Can't talk, busy." Not even a minute later, my best friend says to me, "Dude, tell your girlfriend to leave me alone. She's been texting me all day." FML

#20407951
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41298) - you deserved it (2696)

On 12/19/2012 at 6:31pm - misc - by SugarMyBalls (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, it was my 17th birthday. My mom forgot and my best friend is out of town. The highlight of my day? The guy at McDonalds slipped an extra apple pie in my bag. FML

#4719032
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35628) - you deserved it (2695)

On 08/21/2009 at 9:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was working at a restaurant when my manager approached me and informed me that there was people having sex in the women's washroom, and he needed me to go in and ask them to cut it out. So I did. Five minutes later, a woman walks out with her disabled son and asks to talk to my manager. FML

#6526778
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34009) - you deserved it (2695)

On 11/30/2009 at 12:51am - intimacy - by Janer88 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I realized for the last year that my husband has been home from Iraq, I haven't gotten more than a few hours of sleep at night. Not because he gets nightmares, but because he now snores so loud that the pets sleep at the other end of the house to get rest. FML

#8190091
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18247) - you deserved it (2696)

On 02/13/2010 at 12:23am - misc - by xetsa - Sent from mobile version



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