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Today, at the café I work at, I was yelled at by a woman because the drinks and food she ordered were "taking too long". Before I had the chance to get a word in, she stormed out and said she would never come back. I didn't get the chance to inform her that she hadn't ordered yet. FML

#21106207
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46248) - you deserved it (3429)

On 04/06/2014 at 8:20pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, some girl's mom gave me a load of abuse for endangering her daughter's health. How? By deleting my Facebook account, which caused her to have a serious panic attack. Apparently she thought we were best friends, and that I was ditching her. I'm confused too. FML

#21149491
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46121) - you deserved it (3429)

On 05/23/2014 at 6:44pm - misc - by nikaea (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my friends and I went paintballing. The instructor showed us the sound of an unloaded gun by shooting at my face. It wasn't unloaded. FML

#21277056
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48028) - you deserved it (3429)

On 10/13/2014 at 5:33pm - health - by clumsylobster - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, the amount of spiders in my house has gotten so bad that it's become routine to shake out any blankets or towels before using them. FML

#21422575
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27410) - you deserved it (3429)

On 06/07/2015 at 11:13pm - animals - by terrified - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boyfriend, and best friend, had baked a cake, and wouldnt tell anyone who it was for. When I asked he said I'd know soon. He met me after class to break up with me and offered me the cake to make me feel better. FML

#915379
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68231) - you deserved it (3428)

On 04/11/2009 at 2:38pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, when I arrived at work, I was greeted by my gorgeous co-worker telling me my red shirt looked awesome on me. Before I could compliment her, she added the color was fitting perfectly with my acne... I heard a couple of giggles around me. FML

#4835743
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47377) - you deserved it (3428)

On 08/26/2009 at 1:07pm - misc - by 1nfected (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I caught my mother trying to text on her iPhone, with her nipple. FML

#18364433
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41518) - you deserved it (3428)

On 11/27/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he believes getting kicked in the balls is a scientifically-proven method of birth control. FML

#19428378
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26677) - you deserved it (3428)

On 04/08/2012 at 6:37am - intimacy - by Jordan - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I woke up from a much needed nap realizing I should take my pain medication. My mother then told me she had thrown them out so I wouldn't get addicted and become a drug dealer. FML

#20723014
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60330) - you deserved it (3428)

On 06/13/2013 at 3:05am - health - by _Tatyana_ - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I ordered a chicken sandwich. I was starving and it was the fastest thing to order. Half way through it, I found something which does not belong, and removed it. It was half a cockroach, and I don't know where the other half is. FML

#5643863
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47299) - you deserved it (3427)

On 10/04/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by Foufinator - Sent from mobile version

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making out, I slowly took my clothes off and revealed my body to her for the first time. She looked, smiled, and said reassuringly, "Aww, don't worry. I know how it's supposed to look." FML

#20095343
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31704) - you deserved it (3427)

On 09/30/2012 at 3:37pm - intimacy - by whatswrongwithit?:( (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit at me because I laughed at her idea of getting the Cullen family tree tattooed on her back. FML

#20079438
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33201) - you deserved it (3427)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:22pm - love - by Shame (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was stopped behind a pickup truck filled with junk. I told my friend that the person should have secured the junk better, since it looked like it would fall off any minute. My friend assured me it wouldn't. Right after she said that, a large piece of plywood fell off and hit my windshield. FML

#21300434
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30290) - you deserved it (3427)

On 11/16/2014 at 11:17pm - misc - by pickuptruckblues - Canada (Ontario)



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