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Today, my girlfriend broke up with me with a message that I had to pay $1 to see. FML

#18856263
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26914) - you deserved it (3054)

On 01/19/2012 at 8:46pm - love - by Alejandroc - Honduras (Cortes)

Today, I spontaneously got my ear pierced. By spontaneously, I mean my 12-year-old sister stabbed one of her earrings into my ear while I was sleeping. She claimed the freckle on my earlobe looks "exactly the same" as the hole from her ear piercing. FML

#20801253
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45758) - you deserved it (3054)

On 07/24/2013 at 2:03pm - kids - by ouch - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to go tree shopping with my dad and some of his work buddies. It hit its lowest point when one loudly told us about a crap handjob he got recently. "I mean yeah, choke the cock," he said, "but don't choke it to DEATH, nam'sayin'?" I'd never wanted to just drop dead more. FML

#20993322
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35227) - you deserved it (3054)

On 12/15/2013 at 12:18pm - misc - by ANONYMOUS -_- (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while my in-laws were visiting, my two-year old accidentally pushed the door wide open while I was sitting on the toilet. My mother-in-law laughed, took out her cell phone, snapped a picture of me and posted it on Facebook for everyone in our family to see. FML

#21379759
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30625) - you deserved it (3054)

On 03/22/2015 at 9:58pm - kids - by Mary C. (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out the reason my boyfriend asked me out was because the fortune ball app on his iPod told him to. FML

#8364969
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23182) - you deserved it (3053)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:38am - love - by amireallyloved - United States (California)

Today, I was playing my bass clarinet around the house. I asked my dad if he would be at my concert on December 16th. His response was, "No, I'm working that day." My dad is a plumber, and gets called to work completely at random; he has no schedule. FML

#13693546
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23083) - you deserved it (3053)

On 11/02/2010 at 9:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I noticed that the walls of my apartment are ridiculously thin, when I heard my neighbor slowly walk up the stairs, slam the bathroom door, lift the toilet cover, take a pee and end with a nice "AAHH." FML

#13030985
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27110) - you deserved it (3053)

On 09/13/2010 at 2:49am - misc - by edwinduarte1 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to the bank to get a temporary debit card since I lost my wallet a week ago. On my drive across the street from the bank to the DMV a car slammed into mine at the intersection, nearly totaling my car. The movie theater I went to last week just called and said they'd found my wallet. FML

#13957675
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21815) - you deserved it (3053)

On 11/24/2010 at 2:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend yet again unsuccessfully tried to hold in uncontrollable giggling every time I moaned or sighed during sex. He's 24. I'm terrified of his reaction should I ever reach an orgasm with him. FML

#19557308
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27617) - you deserved it (3053)

On 05/01/2012 at 7:02am - intimacy - by epicsquishii (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my tire blew while I was on the freeway. I had to change the tire in pouring rain while wearing short shorts and flip-flops. No one stopped to help, but several people politely honked as if to remind me of my misfortune. FML

#20062636
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19198) - you deserved it (3053)

On 09/08/2012 at 12:47am - misc - by wonder woman (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after almost nine months of doing anything and everything to show my love for my girlfriend and make her happy, she told me she would give "anything" to relive the one week of her and her ex's relationship where she was the happiest in her life. FML

#7831807
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27007) - you deserved it (3052)

On 02/02/2010 at 10:52pm - love - by redjesus69 (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking through an old photo album of mine. I turned to a page with a picture of me on my last day of college. I thought the picture was quite nice. He turned to me and said, "Don't worry, I take bad pictures too." FML

#12234488
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24465) - you deserved it (3052)

On 07/31/2010 at 10:28pm - love - by XxHinkaixX (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, in front of my family, my brother's wife announced that she was pregnant with their first child. Everyone joked around and said I was next. Two weeks ago I found out that I'm sterile. FML

#15487602
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49950) - you deserved it (3052)

On 03/25/2011 at 8:07pm - health - by dazzla08 -



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