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Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she could not stand the thought of being in a relationship with a man who wears orange. This is the first time I've worn an orange shirt in at least 6 months. FML

by vat / 02/25/2013 at 3:33am / Hong Kong / Love

Today, after months of saving, I went to buy the wedding ring I promised to buy my fiancée. Just seconds after I walked in, the owner asked me to leave, saying he doesn't serve "trash" like me, while pointing at the memorial tattoo on the back of my hand. FML

by Anonymous / 12/13/2014 at 3:21pm / United States / Money

Today, I sold my Christmas gift from my father on eBay as I'm so desperate for cash. It's also the day I got scammed by an eBay buyer. FML

by naive_girl / 07/03/2016 at 8:11pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Money

Today, my parents asked if they could borrow my car. Why? Because they were going to see someone about a Craig's List ad and wanted to look poor. FML

by poorcar / 10/05/2009 at 3:38am / United States (Minnesota) / Money

Today, I learned that the gap between the elevator and the 6th floor landing of my apartment building is approximately one key's width wide. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2009 at 11:01am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was fired on my second day of work after a year and a half of unemployment. Apparently, my "tendency to solve problems instead of just accepting them made the other workers uneasy". FML

by anonymous / 04/24/2013 at 12:55am / Germany / Work

Today, due to summer Ramadan, we have 16 hour long fasts. Normally this is okay, except today I managed to sleep through both suhoor and iftaar. I haven't eaten for 36 hours. FML

Today, my family had a secret meeting on my "puberty issues." I'm 21. FML

by vansboy / 11/14/2010 at 11:26pm / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend pulling off scabs and eating them. My scabs. FML

by Scabby / 04/11/2012 at 5:53am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Health

Today, my wife knows tattoos are a huge turnoff for me. She decided the best way to change my mind about them would be to get one. Across her neck. Of our dog's name. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2012 at 2:43am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally convinced my mum to take me to a psychologist. As soon as he sat me down and asked me how I was doing, my mum burst into tears and went on a rant about how her life is terrible and she regrets everything. I was asked to sit in the waiting room. She used up my whole hour. FML

by :-( / 07/17/2013 at 1:22am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I won a goldfish at the amusement park. My little brother took him out of the bowl because he thought he was drowning. FML

by That idiot / 08/27/2014 at 10:33pm / United States (Nevada) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend of five years proposed to me in front of my entire family. He later confessed that it was part of a dare with his friends because, "There was no way you'd say yes." Guess who has to explain this to all my relatives? FML

by mavstrr1764847 / 06/27/2011 at 2:38pm / United States (Colorado) / Love