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Today, after weeks, I've finally reached my goal and lost 10 lbs. My sister got jealous about me losing weight, and told my parents and coworkers that I'm anorexic. Hello, intervention. FML

#16931515
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33392) - you deserved it (2679)

On 07/01/2011 at 1:56am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had to spend the morning and afternoon waiting for my uncle to take a crap after his hernia surgery. It never happened, and in the end I drove home, only to find the highway just as backed up as my uncle's colon. FML

#17697581
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19520) - you deserved it (2679)

On 09/08/2011 at 4:47pm - health - by wilmerjean - United States

Today, my mom took me to an AA meeting because she said I needed help. I have never tried alcohol in my life, and told them this. I was then harangued by the "instructor" because apparently one of the signs of alcoholism is denial. FML

#17202338
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32425) - you deserved it (2679)

On 07/21/2011 at 10:10am - health - by blah (man) - United States

Today, I woke up to people in the parking lot screaming "everybody wake up". They've been doing this at 7 every morning since I moved in 3 months ago. FML

#18014606
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26005) - you deserved it (2679)

On 10/18/2011 at 11:10am - misc - by Tony - United States

Today, my brother offered my boyfriend $50 to dump me. Guess who's single. FML

#19997949
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26667) - you deserved it (2679)

On 08/02/2012 at 4:11am - love - by Kelly - United States (California)

Today, I'm participating in a 30 hour awareness-raising event on famine in Africa. I'm supposed to hand out leaflets to people from my booth. My school decided to hand out a literal crate-load of free cupcakes right in front of us. FML

#19239512
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18521) - you deserved it (2679)

On 03/08/2012 at 2:15pm - misc - by hungry - Canada

Today, while at work, a man grabbed my beard, said it was impressive, and then uttered the words, "I love you." FML

#19526031
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21741) - you deserved it (2679)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:46am - work - by foshizzle (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend and I are on our way back from vacation. It will be an eight hour drive. It just so happens I got food poisoning the night before we left, and there's roadwork everywhere. We're at a dead halt with no signs of moving. FML

#20851738
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41398) - you deserved it (2679)

On 08/24/2013 at 1:21am - misc - by Holding - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was planning on asking out a girl I've been really close to for a few months now. I was with her when I got a forward text from my friend. It was from the girl and it said "noooo tell him not to ask me out I don't like him." I got rejected via forward text before I told her how I felt. FML

#4562834
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35687) - you deserved it (2678)

On 08/16/2009 at 12:33am - love - by Tgreject (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was rudely stopped in the park by a woman screaming at me for being a slut for having a baby so young. She got so worked up that she started swearing. Not only was I just babysitting for a friend, I am unable to get the toddler to stop swearing. FML

#14772330
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40556) - you deserved it (2678)

On 01/30/2011 at 9:46am - kids - by QuicksilverMaximoff (woman) - United Kingdom (St. Helens)

Today, my girlfriend of two years confessed that she'd gotten married. But not to worry: she only did it for "tax reasons." FML

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend about extinct peoples, and I said how close the Jewish people came to becoming one. She condescendingly told me they don't exist anymore. When I asked what she was talking about, I realized she was confusing them with the Vikings. What the hell? FML

#20126556
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20921) - you deserved it (2678)

On 10/21/2012 at 12:00pm - misc - by tempted to become single (man) - United States (California)

Today, a girl came into my salon to permanently straighten her really long and curly hair. After several long hours, I went to the counter to charge her. She ran out faster than an Olympic runner. FML

#17473722
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36253) - you deserved it (2677)

On 08/14/2011 at 8:47pm - work - by theultimatesalonfail - United States



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