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Today, I was on a date with someone I've had a crush on for a long time. It was after midnight, we were chatting in the car and I was close to having my first kiss ever. That is, until a bunch of policemen popped up to arrest my date for being a suspected drug dealer. FML

#8651104
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33520) - you deserved it (3442)

On 02/25/2010 at 10:05pm - love - by ifaisal - Qatar (Ad Dawhah)

Today, after disappearing for an unusually long period of time, my boss called the store phone while sitting on the toilet. Turns out she'd started bleeding uncontrollably from the arse, and as the only other female staff member, she needed me to go help her. FML

#15151790
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35236) - you deserved it (3442)

On 02/28/2011 at 1:29pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, my father bought a riding lawn mower. We don't have a lawn. FML

#20835961
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42515) - you deserved it (3442)

On 08/13/2013 at 8:08pm - money - by What. - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. We are on a cruise together. She has already found another room to sleep in. FML

#20899028
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52027) - you deserved it (3442)

On 09/28/2013 at 11:21am - love - by Christian (man) - United States

Today, marks the fourth day in a row that I've worn the same outfit to prove to my parents that they pay me no attention. They still haven't noticed. FML

#21405167
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31290) - you deserved it (3442)

On 05/05/2015 at 3:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after finally giving up on the search for my lost dog, I realized that my neighbors had found her and are convinced that she was a stray. They won't give her up and are now mad at me for trying to take my own dog back. FML

#1078631
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73097) - you deserved it (3441)

On 04/18/2009 at 2:45am - animals - by englishtrio (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband and I are divorcing because HE had an affair. He now wants a paternity test. FML

#14024003
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35038) - you deserved it (3441)

On 11/29/2010 at 2:20pm - kids - by preggers - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom still hasn't gotten over the novelty of our brand new microwave. We've been eating hot pockets for nearly a week now. FML

#17281268
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28585) - you deserved it (3441)

On 07/27/2011 at 7:45pm - misc - by ladytyy - United States (Illinois)

Today, I learned that I'm allergic to hornets. I also learned that when your mom sprays a hornets' nest, and they come after you, that jumping in the pool doesn't help. They hover and wait for you to surface. FML

#17248199
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40169) - you deserved it (3441)

On 07/25/2011 at 12:14am - health - by sisi9999 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got a date for Valentine's Day. The date is with my orthodontist; he's going to tighten my braces. FML

#18984766
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24940) - you deserved it (3441)

On 02/03/2012 at 3:47pm - misc - by tooembarassed - United States

Today, I ripped my stitches while taking a shit. FML

#21389247
106 comments

Today, I sent my father a text asking when he was finally coming to meet his 4-month-old granddaughter. His response? "I forgot." He forgot he has a granddaughter. FML

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years asked my dad if he could marry me, and my dad agreed. He then tells me that he's not going to propose for maybe another year at least, he "just wanted to get that out of the way." FML

#18610596
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30352) - you deserved it (3440)

On 12/25/2011 at 8:28pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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