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Today, I was meeting the mayor of a major city as part of an internship program. Seated directly in front of him during his presentation on the budget crisis, he unleashed an enormous, foul fart in front of the entire audience. And then blamed it on me, everyone believed him. FML

#3859879
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50204) - you deserved it (2643)

On 07/18/2009 at 4:10pm - work - by justdoingmyjob (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mother machine-washed a suit I rented for a friends wedding, despite me informing her that it was dry-clean only, and that the store would take care of it. I now owe $1600 to replace the suit, and my mum is refusing to help pay, as she was "only trying to help." FML

#7514878
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32460) - you deserved it (2643)

On 01/23/2010 at 1:40am - love - by Phoenix - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up to a broken window and 3 guys sitting in my living room watching TV. FML

#13413623
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34136) - you deserved it (2643)

On 10/11/2010 at 11:06pm - misc - by anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was at the DMV getting temporary tags for my new car. While waiting in line, a huge fat lady behind me felt the need to run her finger down the scar on the back of my neck. FML

#13033925
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32584) - you deserved it (2643)

On 09/13/2010 at 11:14am - misc - by dmvsucks (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, as I walked out the door to head to class, my neighbour's kid threw a balloon at me, filled with some kind of foul-smelling liquid that he calls "liquid ass". I had a presentation 20 minutes later and couldn't get the smell off myself in time. FML

#21100982
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36347) - you deserved it (2643)

On 03/31/2014 at 1:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Japan (Hyogo)

Today, after spending two days cleaning my car inside and out, I had to pick up my brother when his truck died in the mountains, on a dirt road. He was drunk. I now have a car covered in mud and filled with vomit. FML

#3483352
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34783) - you deserved it (2642)

On 07/04/2009 at 4:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I ordered a pizza online to be delivered to my apartment. After an hour of waiting, I called the pizza place to ask what the problem was. Apparently, the people at the apartment below me took my already paid for pizza and ate it. FML

#13829681
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27301) - you deserved it (2642)

On 11/13/2010 at 5:34pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I called a possible employer I had an interview with about a week ago to see if I had got the job that I have already been trained for. Her response? "Are you sure I interviewed you?" FML

#16139951
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25264) - you deserved it (2642)

On 05/12/2011 at 2:17am - work - by Username -

Today, at my dental practice, we received a shipment of the stupid flavoured gloves my boss ordered to make the place more "friendly to the kids". I started working in an adult patient's mouth, when he decided to start creepily making out with my fingers. FML

#17661211
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31880) - you deserved it (2642)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:42pm - work - by -- - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my mom said she wanted me to get laser eye surgery before she did, "Just in case it isn't safe." FML

#16158783
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33657) - you deserved it (2642)

On 05/13/2011 at 3:18pm - health - by samadams42 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was driving down a one-way street, when some raging dumbass came screaming the wrong way down the road at me. My instant reaction was to brake and give the guy a chance to do the same. His instant reaction was to keep going and wreck my car. FML

#20853636
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38605) - you deserved it (2642)

On 08/25/2013 at 12:23pm - misc - by hello higher premiums, fuckwad (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my soon to be mother-in-law sent me a birthday present. It was a necklace for me to wear at my wedding. The pendant is a well known lesbian symbol. I'm a woman and I'm marrying her son. FML

#5392687
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35945) - you deserved it (2641)

On 09/21/2009 at 12:32pm - love - by whasian (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out my class was attempting to raise money for me through a bake sale because some girl spread a false rumor that I was raped and that my father was going to disown me. The whole school believes it and my biology teacher took me aside and asked if I needed someone to confide in. FML

#3806644
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60002) - you deserved it (2641)

On 07/16/2009 at 4:32pm - misc - by dork (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)



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