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Today, was the first day all week I got to sleep in. I woke up this beautiful morning to the sun shining in my window and hundreds of carpenter ants crawling over my sheets and me. FML

#4677872
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41768) - you deserved it (2640)

On 08/20/2009 at 8:45am - misc - by tommy3824 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me so she could "let her life flow in the direction she wants." Apparently that includes smoking, stealing and making out with other girls at parties. The best part? She wants to get back together "after she matures and gets it out of her system." FML

#6377568
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26595) - you deserved it (2640)

On 11/20/2009 at 4:30am - love - by ApparentlyIFail (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my parents held an intervention for me. Apparently they think I'm turning into a goth. All because they saw me re-lacing my shoes with black shoelaces instead of white ones. FML

#14204770
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28283) - you deserved it (2640)

On 12/14/2010 at 6:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was coaching at a swim meet. I heard a few of my swimmers screaming about a huge wasp on my head, so I told everyone to stay calm because we didn't want to upset the wasp. Unfortunately, I was interrupted by another coach from our team hitting me repeatedly on the head with a clipboard. FML

#12251275
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27682) - you deserved it (2640)

On 08/01/2010 at 8:20pm - health - by Doodle (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend and I had breakfast with his grandmother. She told him how I'm prettier than "that Mexican" he'd brought home for dinner last week. We had dinner with her last week, and I'm that same Mexican. She then went on to how Mexicans are what's wrong with the economy. FML

#20071462
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25771) - you deserved it (2640)

On 09/14/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by MexicanMe (woman) - United States

Today, my boss' son is training to take over my job as head translator, after having convinced his dad that he's fluent in Spanish, and that my skills suck. I soon walked in on him using Google Translate on a legal document. My boss refuses to believe me. FML

#20898132
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44212) - you deserved it (2640)

On 09/27/2013 at 3:41pm - work - by anahira6 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was late for work and took a taxi. The driver tells me he tried to commit suicide recently. I listen to him for 20mins, sat outside my workplace with the meter off. He charges me £5.80 and my boss gives me a warning for being late. FML

#1315
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16876) - you deserved it (2639)

On 01/16/2009 at 2:27am - work - by hapless - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I went out to dinner with my family. I was given a kids menu when the hostess sat us down. I'm 24. FML

#62239
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39439) - you deserved it (2639)

On 02/17/2009 at 6:23pm - misc - by morg2000 - Mexico

Today, I realized that the only boy who ever called me pretty was my 5-year-old brother. My sister then scolded him for lying. FML

#13825613
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28405) - you deserved it (2639)

On 11/13/2010 at 9:25am - kids - by blueheron93 (woman) - Germany (Hessen)

Today, after a week of not seeing each other, my boyfriend has a three day break from work. This would be great if he hadn't just told me he's having a Guild Wars 2 marathon. Now all I have to look forward to is slow wifi and anguished screams every time his character dies. FML

#20084035
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16975) - you deserved it (2639)

On 09/22/2012 at 7:49pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boyfriend and I went mini golfing with his family. We had a competition going on, and when I managed to get two consecutive holes in one, he started seething and muttered that I'm dangerously close to becoming single. FML

#19652024
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22628) - you deserved it (2639)

On 05/20/2012 at 2:20pm - misc - by Jacquelinez (woman) - United States

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Dinner was going well until her dad secretly fed the asparagus to the dog under the table, and then "discovered" what a childish thing I had done. My girlfriend believed him. FML

#20997471
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38156) - you deserved it (2639)

On 12/18/2013 at 9:59pm - misc - by bf - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to see my guidance counselor. I was supposed to hear from my college about a scholarship by October 3rd. I was worried since it was already the 2nd so I went to talk to her. She never turned in my nomination. Goodbye $80,000 scholarship. FML

#5615281
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47115) - you deserved it (2638)

On 10/03/2009 at 12:37am - misc - by Screwed (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



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