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Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to pick me up, throw me over his shoulder and take me to the bedroom. Little did he know that he literally threw me over his shoulder, and I face-planted on the ground. FML

#14194626
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27517) - you deserved it (2761)

On 12/13/2010 at 8:04pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I made a fresh juice for a customer. He called the cops because the juice was too acidic for him. He sat in a corner and waited for two hours for them to arrive. Obviously, they didn't turn up. So he yelled at me and left. FML

#16367942
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33547) - you deserved it (2761)

On 05/27/2011 at 1:46am - work - by Alice - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a party. He got drunk and started talking about how his hot blonde girlfriend gives him great blowjobs. I'm a brunette. FML

#20004612
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33500) - you deserved it (2761)

On 08/05/2012 at 9:15pm - intimacy - by kklaucen14 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was notified that the company did not give me a raise two months ago like I thought. The increase was a typo. Two months ago I wrote a thank you for the raise email to my boss. Now I get to write a check to the company to pay back my "raise." FML

#20676088
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34670) - you deserved it (2761)

On 05/20/2013 at 7:07pm - work - by Check Writer - United States (California)

Today, I found out my fiancée's been cheating on me. Her excuse? Her ADHD made her do it. FML

#21257049
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37678) - you deserved it (2763)

On 09/12/2014 at 5:36pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boss expects me to conduct a meeting with a client, give him all the info he needs, and manage his campaign. This is because he fired the "expensive" marketing director and wants me, the intern, to continue his work. FML

#21237282
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34906) - you deserved it (2761)

On 08/14/2014 at 6:31am - work - by givemestrength - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, at work, I dropped a heavy block of lead on my hand. On my hunt for ice, I had to tell my manager - who told her manager, who told the chief - in the end, the whole department found out and they made me fill in two long arsed incident reports. I had to fill them in myself with my busted up hand. FML

#7192176
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19581) - you deserved it (2760)

On 01/07/2010 at 12:19am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to clean up after the kid that discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML

#17720492
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30896) - you deserved it (2760)

On 09/11/2011 at 3:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, I went on a blind date. All my date would talk about was how he was 'really his own best friend.' FML

#18614469
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22887) - you deserved it (2760)

On 12/26/2011 at 7:11am - love - by SoccerBabe42 (woman) - Canada

Today, I came to school late because I had to drop off my daughter at school. When I got on campus, the security told me I was late but I said, "Oh no, I work here." and he said, "Oh like I haven't heard that one before." And he took me to detention. My boss, the Principal, had to bail me out. FML

#94927
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43881) - you deserved it (2759)

On 02/21/2009 at 6:22am - work - by Lily (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the dentist to get a filling. Instead of giving me Novocaine, my dentist decided he was going to use a special new paste on me while he drilled. It didn't work. FML

#16764992
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32422) - you deserved it (2759)

On 06/20/2011 at 3:21pm - health - by StupidDentist (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband told me the only reason we're still together is because he can't afford to move out. FML

#17748874
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26864) - you deserved it (2759)

On 09/15/2011 at 12:42am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend, who lives 100 miles away and whom I haven't seen in 2 months, told me he was visiting my city with some friends. I assumed this was an opening to an invitation, but no, he just asked me about the best places to get drunk. FML

#20013231
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20522) - you deserved it (2759)

On 08/10/2012 at 8:57am - misc - by blink_kid - United Kingdom (West Lothian)



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