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Today, I had a band concert and my mum got kicked out. She screamed "BORING!" in the middle of it. FML

#18803837
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25860) - you deserved it (2978)

On 01/14/2012 at 8:34am - misc - by katie876 (woman) - United States

Today, at my first day on the job, a customer threatened my life because our vending machine had run out of Doritos. FML

#20880018
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39672) - you deserved it (2978)

On 09/13/2013 at 7:13pm - work - by Anonynommer (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I'm in the process of adopting a child. When I called my mom to tell her the news, she just said, "Oh honey, don't adopt, it's the worst decision you'll ever make." I'm adopted. FML

#21110479
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47363) - you deserved it (2978)

On 04/11/2014 at 5:58pm - kids - by babylove - South Africa

Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML

#19343644
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23406) - you deserved it (2977)

On 03/25/2012 at 7:59am - animals - by PicklesMcRaptor - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend gave me lingerie from Victoria's Secret. He then added that his mother picked it out. FML

#20459473
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28570) - you deserved it (2977)

On 01/14/2013 at 7:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, I came home from a long day from work, only to find a strange woman in my apartment. She explained that my roommate told her it was OK to spend a few days here. I guess he forgot that the room was mine. FML

#21083808
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36020) - you deserved it (2977)

On 03/11/2014 at 3:21am - misc - by why me? (man) - United States (California)

Today, I bought a Santa hat. After wearing the hat for a few hours, I noticed a strange lump near the tip of it. I stuck my hand inside to dig out the mysterious object. It was a dead cockroach. FML

#21308445
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30185) - you deserved it (2977)

On 11/29/2014 at 11:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, the cable repairman came to fix my cable which has never worked well. The entire time he was talking about how much extra money he got the "fat bitch who moved here 6 months ago" to pay for her cable. I moved in 6 months ago. I was pregnant. FML

#3319716
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51733) - you deserved it (2976)

On 06/28/2009 at 8:44pm - misc - by fmerunning (woman) - United States (California)

Today, when I went to pick up my daughter from preschool, I found out she'd "accidentally" tried to flush her clothes down the toilet while going to the bathroom. FML

#10713367
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23234) - you deserved it (2976)

On 05/23/2010 at 2:02pm - kids - by rkl2010 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I told my mom I was going to a New Year's party. She told me to be back by midnight. FML

#18671764
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35262) - you deserved it (2976)

On 01/01/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by tooearly (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my co-worker and I were having a conversation in Russian. Our boss overheard us talking, shouted, "I know you're talking about me! I speak Spanish too!" and threatened to fire us. FML

#20061927
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25318) - you deserved it (2976)

On 09/07/2012 at 12:23pm - work - by PuddlePirate (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I decided to spend a few days at my grandma's house, to help her clean the place up a bit. So far, she's given me a "no masturbating under my roof" talk, used multiple racist slurs, and yelled "QUIET DOWN!" when I so much as sneezed in the next room. FML

#21234785
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35411) - you deserved it (2976)

On 08/11/2014 at 11:02am - misc - by welptimetoburntheplacedown (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my friends and I went paintballing. The instructor showed us the sound of an unloaded gun by shooting at my face. It wasn't unloaded. FML

#21277056
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44649) - you deserved it (2976)

On 10/13/2014 at 5:33pm - health - by clumsylobster - Australia (Western Australia)



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  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

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