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Today, I am sitting next to a guy who very clearly has lice crawling on his head. It's a six hour flight. FML

#21006067
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41722) - you deserved it (2250)

On 12/26/2013 at 11:16am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years role-plays on the internet, pretending to have sex with men. His response when I confronted him about it? "Which specific incidents are you referring to?" FML

#7412437
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16350) - you deserved it (2249)

On 01/18/2010 at 1:03am - intimacy - by heterolifepartner (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I will be sleeping in my aunt and uncle's living room. It is 90 degrees. There is an air conditioner but if you turn it on, the raccoons living in the wall will get pissed off and try to claw through the wall. Only five more nights sweating my balls off or imagining racoons having angry sex. FML

Today, when I woke up I checked my phone for messages, only to hear a woman screaming that I have been sleeping with her husband and that she is sending her 'people' after me. I have never met said husband. I panicked for hours only to receive a call telling me she had dialed the wrong number. FML

#18705736
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25301) - you deserved it (2249)

On 01/04/2012 at 12:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad insisted on having a family movie night. He chose the movies Jaws and Mayday. I'm going on a diving expedition tomorrow. FML

#19271191
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18613) - you deserved it (2249)

On 03/13/2012 at 1:59pm - misc - by Samantha - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out that the vacation my mom has been planning to "repair our relationship" was just an opportunity to change her Facebook profile picture. FML

#20895309
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31802) - you deserved it (2249)

On 09/25/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by clarakipper (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a text from my boyfriend that said, "Last week was the most embarassing time of my life, we're over." He was of course referring to the seizure that I had due to my epilepsy at Olive Garden. FML

#6060291
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39252) - you deserved it (2248)

On 10/29/2009 at 7:44pm - love - by Allie (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I counted the amount of stuff that my dad had bought within a week: a brand new boat, car, and truck. He also has countless gadgets at his office, including a 60" television. Our house is literally falling apart but Mr. Midlife-crisis won't do anything to help. FML

#17498014
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26464) - you deserved it (2248)

On 08/17/2011 at 5:50am - money - by phonemenace (man) - United States (California)

Today, my asshole of a roommate finally decided to move out. Not only did he take his belongings with him, he took some of mine as well. Including my dog. FML

#17493328
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32656) - you deserved it (2248)

On 08/16/2011 at 8:31pm - animals - by busybuzzybee - United States (California)

Today, while using a public restroom to change my tampon, I made eye contact with someone looking at me through the little space in the door. FML

#20496769
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37242) - you deserved it (2248)

On 02/07/2013 at 4:51am - misc - by fviz (woman) - United States

Today, my colleagues and I found out that our boss has been taking business advice from an astrologer as well as a soothsayer. FML

#20886196
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30421) - you deserved it (2248)

On 09/18/2013 at 2:34am - work - by CrystalsDontWork - United States (Texas)

Today, a woman started giving me grief because we didn't have any Boxing Day sales. As I explained to her that dollar stores don't usually have sales, she tried to lamp me. It ended by her getting dragged out of the store. FML

#21006865
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31371) - you deserved it (2248)

On 12/27/2013 at 1:06am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my loser roommate got wasted. He comes to me before going to bed, tells me he loves me, tries to hug me, then explosively vomits all over my face, my hair, my clothes. Then spends the rest of the night retching. FML

#6114528
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27557) - you deserved it (2247)

On 11/02/2009 at 1:47am - health - by theRoomie (man) - United States (California)



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