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Today, I was getting my picture taken. The woman taking it told me to smile, so I did, showing my teeth. She said, "Please, be serious about this." Slightly offended, I smiled with my mouth closed. She then said, "If you can't be serious, we won't do this." FML

#17413633
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29848) - you deserved it (2707)

On 08/09/2011 at 12:01am - misc - by wow (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML

#19710494
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27960) - you deserved it (2707) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm - love - by Monsieur-Madame (man) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)

Today, at the hospital I work at, I had to deliver my best friend's baby. I later found out that my ex boyfriend was the father. Normally this wouldn't faze me, but it did because we broke up last month. FML

#20429423
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42594) - you deserved it (2707)

On 12/29/2012 at 3:25am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was out jogging, when I saw a girl fall off her bike and start crying. I ran over to see if she was hurt. Apparently her neighbour thought I was trying to kidnap her, because he ran out with a baseball bat and threatened to beat me to death if I didn't get lost. FML

#20647971
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45640) - you deserved it (2707)

On 05/07/2013 at 4:21pm - kids - by bet a woman would've been thanked (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I got a bad cut on my dominant hand while at work. My boss decided to order me to juice lemons... all 300 of them. FML

#13223944
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29345) - you deserved it (2706)

On 09/27/2010 at 5:06pm - work - by FoxyManicLiar - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been cheating on me by finding orange panties in my closet. His excuse was "they're a Christmas gift." Thanks honey, I get panties that won't fit, and have little brown streaks. FML

#14022422
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34620) - you deserved it (2706)

On 11/29/2010 at 10:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my boyfriend decided to start an argument and storm off the train we were on. Two stops later, ticket inspectors hopped on the train. He had our tickets. FML

#19874685
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20431) - you deserved it (2706)

On 07/01/2012 at 3:07am - misc - by rinala -

Today, my boyfriend's transition into an annoying hipster is complete. It started with the not-really-necessary nerd glasses and the Mötley Crüe t-shirt, the final straw being the affected British accent. I'm considering where to dump the body. FML

#20086118
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23823) - you deserved it (2706)

On 09/24/2012 at 1:07am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, it transpired that my mom has been spending her stint in prison trying to play matchmaker for me, going so far as to call one of her finds, "good breeding stock". Apparently, I don't already have enough criminals in my life; last September I was the only member of my family of 5 not locked up. FML

Today, I have to get an ultrasound at the hospital. In order to get a clear picture, I need to have a full bladder. I've been waiting my turn for 2 hours now, desperately needing to pee. There are still multiple patients ahead of me. FML

#20851161
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41504) - you deserved it (2706)

On 08/23/2013 at 5:58pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Mexico

Today, I found out that my best friend pays my boyfriend to this day to take me out. FML

#8299484
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32699) - you deserved it (2705)

On 02/15/2010 at 1:08pm - love - by thirdwheel (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was grounded for not agreeing with an article on dating my mom found in a very strict magazine. The article told parents to monitor phone calls, make rumors about their children cheating on people and not allow their children anywhere but home. FML

#14694705
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39134) - you deserved it (2705)

On 01/24/2011 at 2:29am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, my grandparents thought it would be acceptable to give me and my wife Christmas presents to take to my ex-wife, along with a card saying how much they missed her and to get in touch with them next time she is in town. FML

#6843918
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23480) - you deserved it (2704)

On 12/20/2009 at 8:40am - misc - by B-Rizzle (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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