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Today, at the fast food joint I work at, I had to climb into the children's play area and chase out two horny teens who thought it was an appropriate place to stick their hands down each other's pants and fool around. I don't get paid enough for this shit. FML

Today, I got back to my apartment from being away for the past week on Spring break. I found the locks on my apartment changed and all my things on the curb, many of them broken or stolen. I ran to the leasing office to see what had happened. Turns out it was an accounting error on their part. FML

#250263
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (93250) - you deserved it (3315)

On 03/09/2009 at 8:12am - misc - by Homeless (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, at my new job, I took some food out to a customer. Walking away, I heard a lady mumble, "Oh my God, you could never pay me enough to wear that." FML

#14197069
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22980) - you deserved it (3315)

On 12/13/2010 at 11:13pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, the girl I really liked started talking to me, so I asked her out on a date. After waiting an hour at the theatre, I texted her asking where she was. She replied with, "Oh! You were serious about the date?!" FML

#14621087
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36856) - you deserved it (3315)

On 01/18/2011 at 12:05am - love - by MCKilllerrr - United States (Texas)

Today, I opened my Father's Day present from my mother-in-law. It was a glamor shot of her. FML

#16757277
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32882) - you deserved it (3315)

On 06/20/2011 at 1:57am - misc - by firethorn - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on a first date with the guy I really like. During our dinner, he said he needed to go to the bathroom. You guessed it: he didn't come back. FML

#20438667
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37037) - you deserved it (3315)

On 01/02/2013 at 1:59pm - love - by great. -

Today, my wife's boyfriend learned that you can't flush condoms. FML

#21348539
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47504) - you deserved it (3315)

On 02/02/2015 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by StantheMan93 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after I moved into my college dorm three days ago, my roommate is still convinced that she is a cat. FML

#16099079
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27539) - you deserved it (3314)

On 05/08/2011 at 11:22pm - animals - by SMCHR (woman) - Ireland

Today, my sister drove past me while i was walking home in the rain, she honked to let me know she was there, and kept on driving. FML

#16480060
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38160) - you deserved it (3314)

On 06/03/2011 at 4:55am - misc - by myhairgetsfrizzywhenwet (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

#20624598
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52571) - you deserved it (3314)

On 04/27/2013 at 4:28am - misc - by whathehell (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my best friend told me she was pregnant over the phone. While in the middle of telling her congrats, she told me it was with my boyfriend. FML

#4086782
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67041) - you deserved it (3313)

On 07/27/2009 at 7:10pm - misc - by thatonekid (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I came home on leave from a 7 month deployment to Iraq. I wanted to see my girlfriend today, but she needed to spend time with her sick grandmother. As it turns out, her sick grandmother and my cousin are the same person. FML

#4467234
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59344) - you deserved it (3313)

On 08/12/2009 at 2:01am - love - by FUSMC (man) - United States (California)

Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs. FML

#14963197
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27790) - you deserved it (3313)

On 02/13/2011 at 8:18pm - misc - by alice (woman) - United Kingdom



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