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Today, I took my kids to the doctor. In the waiting room, a six year old boy walked up to me, punched me in the crotch, and ran away with my glasses. When the kid's parents made him give me my glasses back, he spat on them. FML

#14354901
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30158) - you deserved it (2787)

On 12/27/2010 at 6:29am - kids - by DeadDude -

Today, I was video chatting with my boyfriend of two years. He asked me to turn off my webcam. I asked why, and he said to just trust him. Turns out it was because he didn't want to see my face as he broke up with me. FML

#17125458
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40872) - you deserved it (2787)

On 07/15/2011 at 6:21pm - love - by emily - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was called by a restricted number. The man on the phone then explained to me in detail what I was doing at every second that I was on the phone with him. I'm scared to leave my house. FML

#18304644
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45338) - you deserved it (2787)

On 11/21/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by bizzyizzy0121 - United States

Today, while my mom was driving me to work, we drove past a lake with an old wooden dock. She stopped the car, pointed and said, "Some guy fucked me right there. I got a splinter in my butt, though, so we finished in his car." FML

#19443097
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36128) - you deserved it (2787)

On 04/10/2012 at 1:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I learned that my anxious and obsessive mother is going to drive three hours every weekend to attend a Johns Hopkins medical course on stress reduction. Why is this bad? I just left home for college and have enjoyed my last two weeks of freedom without her around. I attend Johns Hopkins. FML

#5274396
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33628) - you deserved it (2787)

On 09/15/2009 at 3:45pm - misc - by notcool - United States (Maryland)

Today, I spent the entire day at the hospital and was sent home attached to an obnoxious and somewhat painful heart monitor. I felt fine and decided to go to a bonfire with a few friends. I thought everyone was being nice until I overheard the guys referring to me as an unattractive xbox. FML

#6468992
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25664) - you deserved it (2786)

On 11/26/2009 at 9:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years had proposed to his ex a few days behind and she had declined. FML

Today, my parents got a call from my English teacher. She told them that I have 14 days of detention because I've been cutting class. I've been there every day, but apparently she never noticed me. FML

#18048344
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34796) - you deserved it (2786)

On 10/22/2011 at 7:16pm - misc - by Bree - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend of two months broke up with me because she said I remind her too much of her first boyfriend and it creeps her out. I've checked with all of her friends and family. I am her first boyfriend. FML

#6616832
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32944) - you deserved it (2785)

On 12/05/2009 at 2:14pm - love - by HellaBomber91 (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I wanted to do something special for my upcoming second anniversary with my girlfriend, so I decided to make a short animation of our lives together since we were preschoolers. In the middle of working on the storyboard, she called and broke up with me. FML

#14649899
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31909) - you deserved it (2785)

On 01/20/2011 at 12:18pm - love - by Anonymous - Philippines (Pampanga)

Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML

#17853519
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34877) - you deserved it (2785)

On 09/28/2011 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Sabraynay -

Today, I was denounced for being a terrible person, because my family raises chickens, some of which we eat. I was then told how cruel I am for "killing innocent birds" and that "good" people buy their meat from the supermarket. FML

#20623167
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46318) - you deserved it (2785)

On 04/26/2013 at 2:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico (Baja California)

Today, my father informed me that I was born only because my mom lied about being on birth control. FML

#20755318
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44887) - you deserved it (2785)

On 06/30/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by unfortunate (man) - United States



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