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Today, I had to tell my best friend that I couldn't make it to the lake today or tomorrow because I'd been called in to work. She won't believe me and thinks I'm simply avoiding her. I got called in to bathe and clean dogs' anal glands. FML

#16937181
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25946) - you deserved it (2842)

On 07/01/2011 at 3:23pm - misc - by xXx3mi_MuffinxXx (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, while looking in the mirror at my full-blown grease-spewing acne-riddled face, my father came up behind me and said, "Don't worry son, I had acne like that when I was your age". I replied, "No you didn't", and his immediate response while laughing was, "No, I didn't." FML

#18843385
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27850) - you deserved it (2842)

On 01/18/2012 at 10:18am - health - by harshdoobie (man) - Canada

Today, I helped an elderly woman carry her suitcase down a flight of stairs. When I got to the bottom, a man tackled me to the ground thinking I was stealing the woman's luggage. As I lay in pain, he ran up the stairs to return the suitcase and the poor woman had to carry it down on her own. FML

#20686906
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53054) - you deserved it (2842)

On 05/26/2013 at 5:19am - misc - by gooddeedgonebad (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my car was found with a smashed window and a torn-apart steering column, in order to hot-wire it. The thief didn't get away with my car, though. The engine was in the garage, where I've been working on it for two days. FML

Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML

#7212033
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33640) - you deserved it (2841)

On 01/08/2010 at 2:23am - kids - by PeanutlyDisabled - France

Today, I found out that the cause of the recent pain in my chest was that I had a torn muscle. What caused this? I sneezed. FML

#13093344
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23848) - you deserved it (2841)

On 09/18/2010 at 12:21am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend announced he has stopped wearing deodorant because he thinks his BO smells "manly." FML

#13991584
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27560) - you deserved it (2841)

On 11/26/2010 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, on my metro ride home, I sat next to a woman who thought it was appropriate to continually scratch at her scalp and then eat her 'scalp pickings'. When I looked over at her hair, I could see scabs clumped together from her previous scratching sessions. FML

Today, while volunteering at a local museum, I politely told an elderly gentleman to have a nice day. He responded by yelling "NO" and storming off. Everyone looked at me like I was some sort of monster. FML

#20741264
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37895) - you deserved it (2841)

On 06/22/2013 at 5:16pm - misc - by me - United States (Ohio)

Today, I have to go on a 7-hour-bus ride sitting beside my ex-boyfriend's mother. We broke up because she told him to. FML

#20912397
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45176) - you deserved it (2841)

On 10/08/2013 at 12:04pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I missed my University entrance exam because of heavy traffic. I was stuck at one intersection for over an hour. The real kicker? It took me less than 10 minutes to drive home. FML

#5942414
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30873) - you deserved it (2840)

On 10/22/2009 at 9:11am - misc - by roadrage (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went on a blind double date with my friend. My date was actually blind. Not so bad, he seemed nice, until he told me I sound ugly and annoying. My friend laughed and agreed. FML

#6461991
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30530) - you deserved it (2840)

On 11/26/2009 at 12:44pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, I was house-sitting for some friends of my grandparents while they are out of town. While I was in the shower, the dog decided to take my dirty underwear and run. There is now a pair of lacy, black underwear hidden somewhere this giant house, and they return tomorrow. FML

#19421032
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22106) - you deserved it (2840)

On 04/07/2012 at 12:32am - animals - by day001313 (woman) - United States (Oregon)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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