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Today, I e-mailed the on-line instructor for my job, telling her that I had fallen behind in my work due to my grandmother's passing and the subsequent funeral arrangements, but that I would catch up this week. Her reply? "OK. Hope your grandmother gets better soon." FML

#20679441
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42685) - you deserved it (2798)

On 05/22/2013 at 8:28am - misc - by projectfain - United States (Ohio)

Today, after working for my company for 10 years, my co-workers threw me a farewell party. The boss gave quite an eloquent speech, ending in "we're really gonna miss you Mark." My name is Evan. FML

#163929
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62256) - you deserved it (2797)

On 02/28/2009 at 7:50pm - work - by Grrrrr (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML

#17714662
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35104) - you deserved it (2797)

On 09/10/2011 at 9:54pm - health - by sadddddd (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today I had to listen to my father lecture me on all the potential dangers of Halloween. He has a speech for every holiday, every year. I'm 28 years old. FML

#18062518
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25793) - you deserved it (2797)

On 10/24/2011 at 10:54am - misc - by StromyG2 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got threatened with a gun through the drive thru speaker because I didn't offer some guy any pies to go with his meal. FML

#19291503
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23713) - you deserved it (2797)

On 03/17/2012 at 12:37am - work - by CDeVeney92 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend tried to convince me that she never takes dumps. I told her that as long as she eats, it's a biological impossibility, but she seems to have genuinely deluded herself into thinking it's true, purely because she is a girl. FML

#19997167
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20746) - you deserved it (2797)

On 08/01/2012 at 8:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I got shut in the walk-in freezer at work. I started banging on the door. My boss wouldn't come and open it because she didn't "play games". She thought I was kidding. FML

#20760145
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40400) - you deserved it (2797)

On 07/02/2013 at 5:08pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was working Customer Service at Wal Mart. An elderly lady came to my register to return a pair of white pants. I asked her what was wrong with them and she replied "even when I had underwear on you could still see my pubic hair." The pants had hair on them. FML

#3164567
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54000) - you deserved it (2796)

On 06/24/2009 at 1:41am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my friend told me she was going to start drinking gatorade, so she could get the body shape of the athletes on TV. When I tried to explain to her that she'd also need to work out to achieve this, she went nuts and hurled the bottle at my face. FML

#19818788
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24978) - you deserved it (2796)

On 06/20/2012 at 1:59pm - misc - by phonnah - United States (Maryland)

Today, my husband told me that occasionally I pick my nose while I sleep. I didn't believe him so he showed me the video he took of it. He wants to post it on Facebook. FML

#19995801
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20810) - you deserved it (2796)

On 08/01/2012 at 1:44am - misc - by Emily (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was taken to the principal's office and bitched out about the dangerous weapon I brought to school. The "weapon" was a pocket fan. FML

#20967061
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40029) - you deserved it (2796)

On 11/22/2013 at 4:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my roommate came back from camping. My toothbrush magically reappeared as well. FML

#21250056
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34719) - you deserved it (2796)

On 09/01/2014 at 9:53pm - health - by germophobe (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, it was my father's wedding. He never really cared for me, and his fiancée is my age, but I thought it would mean a lot to him if I went. I was supposed to wait for his call the day before, so he would give me directions and tell me when it starts. He never called. FML

#4899875
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46118) - you deserved it (2795)

On 08/29/2009 at 3:21am - misc - by kkiv (woman) - Poland (Warszawa)



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