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Today, a hornet thought it would be fun to fly into a candle that I had lit. As the hornet burned to death, it flung its charred body at my face, which is more painful than it sounds. FML

#20936891
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39744) - you deserved it (3102)

On 10/28/2013 at 4:18pm - misc - by Asshole hornet - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because he thought he heard another guy in the room when he called me, and that I'm cheating on him. The guy he heard was a character from a cartoon my sister was watching. FML

#20958917
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40363) - you deserved it (3102)

On 11/15/2013 at 5:35pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out my girlfriend is bulimic. Like that wasn't bad enough, I found out because she spent all of our rent money on food. FML

#21345004
112 comments

Today, at a red light, an old lady crossing the street fell right infront of my car. I got out of my car to help her. The light turned green and I was still helping the woman to her feet. An officer came by and ticketed me for "impeding the flow of traffic." FML

#205743
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72790) - you deserved it (3101)

On 03/04/2009 at 10:50am - misc - by VroomVroom (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, it was my co-worker's birthday but she told me not to mention it. Feeling bad for her, I went out to buy her a card, a present, and even a small cake. It turns out that there was actually a party during our lunch break, and I was the only one in our office not invited. FML

#10983443
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35113) - you deserved it (3101)

On 06/05/2010 at 6:36am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out my boyfriend thinks I'm too high maintenance because I have a chronic illness which requires frequent hospitalization. FML

#9059310
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30375) - you deserved it (3101)

On 03/13/2010 at 10:17pm - health - by bobby - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went bowling with my parents. This cute guy works there and he always flirts with me. My mom just so happened to see it today. As we left, she says to him "You know she's 13, right?" I'm 17. FML

#17351481
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41038) - you deserved it (3101)

On 08/03/2011 at 2:01am - love - by Michelle - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend kindly informed me that if I ever got bitten during a zombie apocalypse, he'd love me enough to beat me to death with a tire iron. He said this because he's been having vivid dreams about it happening. I honestly don't know whether he's joking or not. FML

#17775098
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22337) - you deserved it (3101)

On 09/18/2011 at 8:23pm - love - by DeadScared (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out via Facebook status that my boyfriend is going to Hawaii with a group of friends, including his ex-girlfriend for a few weeks. When I confronted him about it, he said he didn't think I needed to know, and to mind my own business. I think I'm about to be single. FML

#19661791
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29898) - you deserved it (3102)

On 05/22/2012 at 10:32am - love - by angry girlfriend - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I checked out a "confessions" page for my university. The first confession was from a guy who whacked off in a campus restroom then used a computer in a lab without washing his hands. I work in that lab. FML

#20501884
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36665) - you deserved it (3101)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to work at my job as a secretary. I had been given the task to file my boss's collection of Playboy magazines alphabetically by name of the centerfold. There was one for every month from the years of 1980 until now. FML

#20895973
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35708) - you deserved it (3101)

On 09/25/2013 at 7:22pm - work - by Abcporn (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that I am "un-promotable" to the job that I have been promised for the last two years because, I "don't suffer idiots well." Idiots. FML

Today, I told my mom I loved her and she asked if I was going to kill myself. FML

#18155
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39333) - you deserved it (3100)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:11pm - misc - by TGIkaty - United States (California)



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