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Today, my boyfriend told me one of the main reasons he started dating me was because I have the same name as his ex, whose name he has tattooed on his back. FML

by tattooed / 11/30/2010 at 10:50am / Ireland (Dublin) / Love

Today, while going to work, I was mugged. On the way back, I was mugged. FML

by Anonymous / 01/11/2011 at 11:04pm / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, I was excited to have a window seat on my three hour flight to New York. When I got to my row, I noticed the screaming newborn occupying the seat in front of me, and a pair of toddlers behind me. I then looked to my seat to find I have no window. FML

by lalalalalala / 03/17/2011 at 12:56pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, I burned my hand while making breakfast. As I staggered around the kitchen in agony, looking for some burn cream, my cat figured he'd latch onto said hand and drag his claws through the burn. FML

Today, I was crying because my cat died. My boyfriend cupped my face in his hands, looked me straight into the eyes and said, "I love seeing you cry." FML

by sliceddice / 03/10/2010 at 11:08am / Denmark (Staden Kobenhavn) / Love

Today, my mother dragged me into Victoria's Secret to get my opinion on some lingerie. Lingerie she'll be using to get into my dad's pants this evening. FML

by Anonymous / 01/27/2011 at 12:02pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, my friend pushed me into the swimming pool. Unfortunately, we were eight feet away from the actual pool, so I face-planted and rolled in. FML

by kyle / 06/05/2011 at 3:00am / United States (Ohio) / Health

Today, I received 5 missed calls from a florist stating that they were having problems delivering a bouquet from my ex. I was thrilled at the idea of a reconciliation. Turns out however that he just got mine and his new girlfriend's phone numbers confused. FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 3:09am / Australia / Love

Today, a revolving door got the better of me. I made it into the crowded lobby, unlike my skirt. Bad day to wear a thong. FML

by Oopsie / 07/28/2015 at 1:18pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous

Today, I visited my boyfriend's uncle's house for a party. His 8 year old cousin started asking if I like penis, so my reaction was to laugh, spitting my drink on her and her new dress. She can't pronounce peanuts, and I can't visit anymore. FML

by me / 01/02/2016 at 3:25am / United States (Louisiana) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend took me out to meet his friends. It was going really well until I left to use the bathroom and two of the girls with us came in and started talking about how creepy Matt's new girlfriend is and that they're happy he's going to dump her. My boyfriend is Matt. FML

by fuuuudge / 08/19/2009 at 1:55am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2014 at 1:04pm / United States (Kentucky) / Animals

Today, I learnt that the girl with who I've being going out for 6 months, has been sleeping with every guy around except one. Guess who? FML

by lectro / 11/24/2008 at 1:08am / Love