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Today, my boss found out that my girlfriend dumped me. He asked if that meant she would no longer bring her delicious homemade cookies to the office. When I said yes, he fired me on the spot. FML

#20990683
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48039) - you deserved it (3056)

On 12/12/2013 at 10:08pm - work - by justin (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, despite all of the empty seats on the bus, a man sat next to me. So close to me that our legs touched. After a few moments of silence, he got closer and whispered in my ear, "You're so quiet." FML

Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him. When I happily told my dad, he kept asking if I'd consider taking back my ex. FML

#21266215
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36509) - you deserved it (3056)

On 09/27/2014 at 4:16am - love - by nyx (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was sick and had soccer trials on the same day. At the soccer trials, the coach called me over and told me I was doing really good and to keep it up. I said thanks and vomited on him. FML

#21293843
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33431) - you deserved it (3056)

On 11/07/2014 at 12:47am - health - by jj - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after going to college for 5 years to become an architect I discover my plumber makes more than I do. FML

#761
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20530) - you deserved it (3055)

On 12/30/2008 at 6:16am - work - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML

#7564644
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29490) - you deserved it (3055)

On 01/25/2010 at 5:18am - kids - by shitface (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend and I spent 30 minutes listening to my grandmother telling us that my cat is a medium. My boyfriend is totally convinced. FML

#14583588
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21730) - you deserved it (3055)

On 01/14/2011 at 11:24pm - animals - by inchetogb - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I confronted my girlfriend after catching her cheating on me. After she finished crying, she had the brass balls to say she'd understand if I needed a couple of weeks to forgive her, and asked me for bus fare so she could go tell the other guy they could only be friends now. FML

#21280490
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37707) - you deserved it (3055)

On 10/18/2014 at 2:44pm - love - by yee-whore (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was in class just taking notes and minding my own business. The teacher has already called my parents twice complaining about me. As we are taking 3 pages of notes she grabs mine and rips them up, saying that she is sick and tired of me drawing. I was drawing the graphs on the board. FML

#5408383
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46531) - you deserved it (3054)

On 09/22/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by wait..what (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was having a nice moment with my granddaughter as she was being affectionate by stroking my face. We were both quite content, until she said, "Aw, Grandma, your skin feels just like a crocodile." FML

#5977481
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30244) - you deserved it (3054)

On 10/24/2009 at 5:14pm - kids - by Granny (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I found out my boyfriend is only with me because he's in love with my sister, who turned him down repeatedly, and I'm the closest he can now get. FML

#14542249
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31347) - you deserved it (3054)

On 01/11/2011 at 4:45am - love - by Username -

Today, I made a new friend: the cricket the doctor pulled out of my ear canal. FML

#20479072
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31791) - you deserved it (3054)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:53am - animals - by Ear Invasion - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I pulled up next to a lady who was trying to text, smoke, and drive. My brother said that she was probably going to cause an accident. He was right. At the next light she hit us. She then yelled that I purposely caused the accident because, "that's how teenagers are". FML

#21129304
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47039) - you deserved it (3054)

On 05/03/2014 at 1:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)



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