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Today, I found out why my dad always treated me badly as a kid compared to my siblings. It's because I was conceived while my mom was cheating on him. On top of that, he made it clear that he still doesn't consider me a "real" part of the family. FML

#21091901
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52720) - you deserved it (3118)

On 03/20/2014 at 4:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I decided to go all-natural and go to work without any makeup on. My boss swore I was on drugs, which I guess had absolutely nothing to do with the completely "random" drug test I had to take later in the day. FML

#21361118
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32071) - you deserved it (3118)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:36pm - work - by vaylosa (woman) -

Today, after finally giving up on the search for my lost dog, I realized that my neighbors had found her and are convinced that she was a stray. They won't give her up and are now mad at me for trying to take my own dog back. FML

#1078631
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68363) - you deserved it (3117)

On 04/18/2009 at 2:45am - animals - by englishtrio (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I parked in front of a grocery store and took the portable GPS system off the mount on the dashboard and put it in my pocket so no one would break into my car and steal it. When I got back, the window was smashed and someone had stolen the plastic mount. FML

#5194159
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37861) - you deserved it (3117)

On 09/11/2009 at 8:40pm - misc - by sucksforme (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years saw baby wipes in my bathroom and assumed I had a kid. He broke up with me. I use baby wipes to take off my makeup. FML

#7972550
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31849) - you deserved it (3117)

On 02/07/2010 at 12:41pm - love - by notababymama (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I finally found the courage to tell my drug addict husband that I'm leaving him. He sat in his chair, denying using drugs, ever. Right after he said this, he passed out and spilled hot coffee on himself. He then denied spilling the coffee. As I was leaving, he took all of my shoes. FML

#17924214
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32423) - you deserved it (3117)

On 10/06/2011 at 10:53pm - love - by stacyyvonne - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad came home drunk off his ass. So drunk that he couldn't manage to open the refrigerator, and ended up punching it in a fit of rage. When I tried to calm him down and get him to bed, he told me to fuck off, and grounded me. FML

#20984974
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37213) - you deserved it (3117)

On 12/08/2013 at 1:00pm - misc - by FML (woman) - Puerto Rico

Today, I was awoken by the sound of my pet lizard eating my other pet lizard. FML

Today, I almost got married. After the elaborate and very expensive wedding, my "husband" decided he did not want to sign the marriage license because he wasn't sure if he really wanted to settle down after all. FML

#4775370
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45898) - you deserved it (3116)

On 08/24/2009 at 1:16am - love - by singleagain (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my left-handed boss needed PC help. I said "right-click for the menu." She said nothing happened. Three times we went through this. Eventually I went over, asking her to show me what she did. She was using her right hand on the left mouse button. She earns £10,000 more than me. FML

#2798980
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60006) - you deserved it (3116)

On 06/11/2009 at 11:21am - work - by girlfriday (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while at the restaurant I work at, a bunch of kids came in. They all gave incredibly complex orders, laughed at everything I did, and made a huge mess by "spilling" hot sauce and water all over the floor. After they left, I was tipped eleven cents. FML

#12209813
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40486) - you deserved it (3116)

On 07/30/2010 at 4:00pm - work - by MLZ (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was fired for using violence and intimidation in the work place. I was a bouncer at a strip club. FML

#19869373
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23369) - you deserved it (3116)

On 06/30/2012 at 1:08am - work - by John - United States (New York)

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

#20184714
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28931) - you deserved it (3116)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)



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