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Today, my 24-year-old brother again yelled at me for looking at him while he was on the toilet. It'd be easier not to if he didn't sit on the toilet with the door wide open, and if the bathroom wasn't directly opposite my bedroom. FML

#20438837
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34149) - you deserved it (3543)

On 01/02/2013 at 3:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, after being forced to take my little sister trick-or-treating, we had the cops called on us twice. She thought it would be funny to tell all the people giving out candy that I'd been following her around and that she had no idea who I was, and that she was scared of me. FML

Today, I heard a knock on my door and, thinking it was my student adviser, opened it. I was greeted by a drunk girl, who pushed her way into my dorm room, informed me that she lived here last year, and then told me that she lost her virginity in my bed. FML

#5180863
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37572) - you deserved it (3542)

On 09/11/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by CollegeFreshman (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I realized my family is the textbook definition of redneck after listening to my grandpa threaten to smash with an excavator the trailer that my uncle lives in behind our house if he didn't return the set of tires he had stolen and pawned from my grandpa's garage. FML

#20683275
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38214) - you deserved it (3542)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:06am - misc - by redneckfamily - United States (Washington)

Today, I wore myself out cooking, preparing tasty little dishes for my sweetheart. I heard him arrive and shout as he went up the stairs, "It stinks of shit in here! Have you been cooking?" I threw everything in the bin. We can eat sandwiches. FML

#577
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28648) - you deserved it (3541)

On 12/23/2008 at 1:47am - misc - by zazadudu - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mom went to a psychic. The reason? She has convinced herself that I'm gay, even though I've told her that I'm not and never have been. The psychic disagreed. Apparently, I'm bicurious with one of my guy friends. Guess who my mom believes? FML

#3137659
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56648) - you deserved it (3541)

On 06/23/2009 at 1:28am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I spoke to my dad for the first time in over a year. I've been volunteering in Mongolia, I have no running water, freeze my ass off everyday and communication with anyone who speaks English is scarce. One of the first things my father said to me was, "out of sight, out of mind." FML

#5183635
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34784) - you deserved it (3542)

On 09/11/2009 at 5:01am - misc - by Anonymous - Mongolia (Ulaanbaatar)

Today, I received a text from my girlfriend to break up with me. I was upset. One minute later another text from her said "sorry, wrong person." FML

#4618484
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65965) - you deserved it (3541)

On 08/18/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous - Kazakhstan (Almaty)

Today, I took a cough drop to soothe my sore throat, only to choke, gag, and spend the next ten minutes at the point of vomiting because the bitter lozenge got stuck in my windpipe. FML

#13251603
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23468) - you deserved it (3541)

On 09/29/2010 at 5:29pm - health - by bitter cherry - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I arrived at the beach for a week's vacation. I walk on the beach only to find they are "rebuilding" it. They have heavy machinery all over the place, they work 24/7, and this only happens every 15 years. Glad I picked this week. FML

#17394480
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28228) - you deserved it (3541)

On 08/07/2011 at 3:22am - misc - by me - United States

Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML

#17131745
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36568) - you deserved it (3541)

On 07/16/2011 at 2:23am - money - by Tanner - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my daughter told me that she wanted to convert to Christianity. Not because she has a strong relation with God, but because she wants to post Facebook statuses about Him and "get a lot of likes." FML

#20131695
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28392) - you deserved it (3541)

On 10/24/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

#21053382
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43618) - you deserved it (3541)

On 02/07/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Mayotte



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