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Today, I was in a rush to get to the toilet, I went in and sat on the seat. Then I felt a stinging pain on my left bum cheek. I jumped up quickly to see a wasp splashing around in the bowl. It stung me, and now have a bum cheek twice its normal size, and pee all over my pants. FML

#7243511
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25823) - you deserved it (2892)

On 01/09/2010 at 8:23pm - animals - by targetlove (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I noticed that the walls of my apartment are ridiculously thin, when I heard my neighbor slowly walk up the stairs, slam the bathroom door, lift the toilet cover, take a pee and end with a nice "AAHH." FML

#13030985
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25280) - you deserved it (2892)

On 09/13/2010 at 2:49am - misc - by edwinduarte1 - Sent from mobile version

Today, it was my birthday. But instead of a decent surprise, my friends decided to smash a cake on my face and unhook my dress, while taking a video of it. In a public shopping mall. FML

#12959590
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29366) - you deserved it (2892)

On 09/08/2010 at 3:35am - misc - by Nothingonyou - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to lunch with my sister. As the waitress was bringing our food, she dropped it on the floor. She apologized and brought us new food. After we finished eating and I looked at the bill, I noticed she'd charged us twice. FML

#17757615
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31083) - you deserved it (2892)

On 09/16/2011 at 12:26pm - money - by Username - United States

Today, I left hospital after a three-night stay. Whilst waiting for my taxi to arrive, my mother called me in hysterics wanting to know where I was, because the police had called her and told her I had gone missing. Turns out my doctor "forgot" to tell anyone that I was discharged. FML

Today, my neighbors coated their house in flashing Christmas lights and blared out "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" all day long. Only 29 days left until Christmas. FML

#18358726
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23465) - you deserved it (2891)

On 11/26/2011 at 6:10pm - misc - by Me - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to bury my horse again because coyotes keep digging it up. FML

#19230527
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39192) - you deserved it (2891)

On 03/06/2012 at 11:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, after complaining to the administration about my roommate, I finally got switched. As I went into the room to meet my new roommate, I found out he was my old roommate's brother. They are exactly the same, and I'm not allowed to switch again. FML

#6649432
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30092) - you deserved it (2890)

On 12/07/2009 at 12:08pm - misc - by mylifesuckssomuch3214 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out my fiancé is in a long distance relationship with his ex. Not only do we live on the same island, he's also my neighbor and my co-worker. FML

#9134899
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24951) - you deserved it (2890)

On 03/16/2010 at 4:14pm - love - by KMAC (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, while on the bus, I watched a homeless man pop a pimple on his arm and eat it. FML

#19006098
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28599) - you deserved it (2890)

On 02/05/2012 at 11:09pm - misc - by dadadoo - United States (New York)

Today, it's my sister's birthday. My parents got her a cat. I have serious allergies when it comes to cats. When I brought this issue up with my parents, they replied, "This day is not about you, it's about your sister." I can feel my throat tightening already. FML

#18005415
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34574) - you deserved it (2890)

On 10/17/2011 at 7:46am - health - by Cats...FML (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got ancestry DNA tests for my parents and myself. The DNA testing company informed me that I'm a 50% match for my mother but I share no DNA with my father. Apparently, both my parents forgot that they used a sperm donor. This insignificant detail has slipped their minds for 35 years. FML

#20600180
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46249) - you deserved it (2890)

On 04/17/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Flora (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was talking to the girl I've liked for 2 years. We were assigned partners for a History project so we were going to work on it at my house. When she asked me for directions, I told her I lived on Woodcock Road. She yelled slapped me and stormed off. I was serious. FML

#3894865
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50967) - you deserved it (2889)

On 07/20/2009 at 12:04am - love - by thicklysettled (man) - United States (Massachusetts)



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