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Today, my older brother burst into my bedroom at 4 am to show me photos of sushi. FML

Today, we had movers come in to take all of our stuff as the final step to our move to the States. We have our flight scheduled for tomorrow evening. Thing is, they accidentally took my carry-on bag without my knowledge. In that carry-on there was a little something called a passport. FML

#20093240
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22441) - you deserved it (2772)

On 09/29/2012 at 3:39am - misc - by bluefrisky - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got punched in the face after a stranger asked for a light, didn't realize it was a butane lighter and burnt the tip of his nose lighting his cigarette. Now my nose looks worse than his. FML

#20193519
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16810) - you deserved it (2772)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:30am - misc - by chinousmc - United States (Florida)

Today, I was told I would not be getting the job I was offered because I failed my drug test. They never gave me a drug test. FML

#20660591
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47994) - you deserved it (2772)

On 05/13/2013 at 10:39am - work - by Confused (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I had my wisdom teeth pulled. There was a cyst behind one of them, and the dentist decided to extract it - except the Novocaine didn't reach that far back. I raised my hand like they said to do, and the dentist looked at me writing in pain and said, "No, you're fine." FML

#255362
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68795) - you deserved it (2771)

On 03/09/2009 at 9:03pm - health - by toothache (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was introduced to my future stepmother, but it turns out that I already know her. Not only are we the same age and went to the same high school, when we were in the same math class together the teacher would often confuse our names because "we could pass as twins". FML

#4329050
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64837) - you deserved it (2771)

On 08/06/2009 at 4:45am - misc - by whatismydadthinking (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, after dealing with tons of drama and working a 14 hour shift, I took a shower. When I stepped out, a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid, which fell into the tank and broke it. Now my leg hurts and the bathroom's flooded. FML

#14969181
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28518) - you deserved it (2771)

On 02/14/2011 at 2:11am - misc - by TheKingDavis (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, as I turned the shower on, I got covered in gravy. Turns out, my friends had unscrewed the shower head, filled it with gravy granules, then screwed it back on. FML

#19319473
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24621) - you deserved it (2771)

On 03/21/2012 at 7:46am - health - by J Rush - United Kingdom (Powys)

Today, I was standing in a long line at the Post Office when my 3 year old son starts rubbing up and down my leg. I asked him what he was doing and he said loudly. "I'm humping you like Simon humps me!" Everyone looks at me in shocked horror. Simon is our dog. FML

#6620817
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30172) - you deserved it (2770)

On 12/05/2009 at 7:04pm - animals - by Sissy (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I took my girlfriend's 4-year-old son and four of his friends to the amusement park. While walking down a hill, I slipped on some water and slid down the hill, taking out multiple children. It wasn't rain. I'd slid on vomit. FML

#6532401
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35330) - you deserved it (2770)

On 11/30/2009 at 12:22pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I am lying next to my new husband. We went to Hawaii for our honeymoon and planned on spending the entire time in bed together. We succeeded in that goal, with both of us unable to leave each other's side for entire week. Sex? No. Food poisoning? Yes. FML

#6497491
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38068) - you deserved it (2770)

On 11/28/2009 at 5:03pm - health - by IndieRox (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house so that he could break up with me. I went out to my car to leave only to discover that all of the wheels had been stolen. Even the spare. I had to spend the rest of the day with my ex-boyfriend finding a way to get my car home. FML

#7174533
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24571) - you deserved it (2770)

On 01/06/2010 at 12:24am - love - by lug_nut (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I realized explosive diarrhea can happen, and at the most inopportune times, such as on the day of MY wedding. At the alter while my husband said his vows. FML

#8658648
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53435) - you deserved it (2770)

On 02/26/2010 at 5:23am - love - by pain (woman) - Japan



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