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Today, my old neighbor pelted me with apples when I walked out the door. I ducked for cover and asked what her problem was. She yelled, "You took fresh peas from my garden!" I looked at her garden, only to see my dad tiptoeing back to our lawn, laughing and holding a bag full of peas. FML

#17344218
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31971) - you deserved it (2898)

On 08/02/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by scully11 (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my parents took me on a plane ride for a vacation in Hong Kong. What they didn't tell me was that the "vacation" is extended for three years. FML

#17297166
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42848) - you deserved it (2898)

On 07/29/2011 at 11:37am - misc - by xxxkkxxx - Hong Kong

Today, the girl I've had a crush on decided she wanted to see a movie with me. I tried to hold her hand during the movie and it was great for about 4 minutes. Then she said "Can I have my hand back?" FML

#1552
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19975) - you deserved it (2898)

On 01/18/2009 at 7:12am - love - by vargasm - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to a strange sound that sounded like a lot of water being poured into a sink. It was actually my father in law using the bathtub as a toilet. He's staying with us, and is showing no signs of leaving any time soon. He thinks this is acceptable behavior. FML

#15840429
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26946) - you deserved it (2897)

On 04/18/2011 at 10:33pm - misc - by MyS3lf - United States

Today, my girlfriend woefully admitted that she thinks of me more as a brother than as a boyfriend, all while I was still inside her. FML

#18927018
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36647) - you deserved it (2897)

On 01/27/2012 at 5:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, my brother's girlfriend broke up with him. He has been playing Whitney Houston's "I will always love you" all day. FML

#19045802
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29083) - you deserved it (2897)

On 02/11/2012 at 1:23am - love - by annon - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, someone actually thought it was appropriate to compare my mother's death to the death of their cat. FML

#19125744
203 comments

Today, my school's ski trip got canceled, because "All the snow makes the roads unsafe." We can't go skiing because it's snowing. FML

#20478441
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35028) - you deserved it (2897)

On 01/25/2013 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I drove by a restaurant I ate at yesterday. I write a food review column for my college paper, and I've tried everything on their menu. They were being closed down today because a large amount of rat droppings was found in their food supplies. FML

Today, I discovered that instead of being a harmless way to relax after a rough day, parking in an empty lot apparently means you are either dealing drugs or want to commit suicide. I was detained, my car was searched and I was grilled about my happiness. Great stress relief, eh? FML

Today, I paid £140 for a train ticket. All the seats were full. When I sat in the corridor the guard yelled at me. I paid £140 to stand outside a stinking train toilet for 7 hours. FML

#15858799
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27570) - you deserved it (2896)

On 04/20/2011 at 12:13pm - misc - by Sivvus (woman) - Reserved

Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son what he wanted for Christmas, a stranger came up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parents are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fuckers says." FML

#20200046
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30005) - you deserved it (2896)

On 12/11/2012 at 2:15am - kids - by n1a1t1h1a1n1 (man) - United States (California)

Today, a woman approached me in the street and slapped me, ranting about how I stole her man. I don't even know her man, or her, and I live over a thousand miles away in Scotland. I'm back in town for the first time since my childhood to attend a wedding. FML

#20661106
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46456) - you deserved it (2896)

On 05/13/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by culodegrillo (woman) - Spain



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