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Today, I was training for my new job at a restaurant. As part of training, they give you free food so you know what to reccommend, and the dish I got was really good. Eight hours later I saw it again while I was puking; I got food poisoning from my own place of work. FML

#914179
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49535) - you deserved it (3073)

On 04/11/2009 at 12:12pm - work - by newhostess (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had to file for bankruptcy because my ex-wife didn't want to pay for the house she didn't want me to have in the divorce, and didn't bother to have my name removed from the loan before she filed bankruptcy herself. FML

#8604257
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23338) - you deserved it (3073)

On 02/23/2010 at 11:22pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had to babysit two kids. I told them to stop fighting, or to sit on separate couches. They stopped. I asked why nobody would sit on the other couch, where I'd been sitting. They told me it was the couch their autistic brother often pees on. FML

#14792187
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27265) - you deserved it (3073)

On 01/31/2011 at 10:11pm - misc - by joxerthemighty39 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out that my mother is extremely emotional when it comes to animal deaths when a bird flew into the window and died, and she insisted we have a funeral. FML

#19441830
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18733) - you deserved it (3073)

On 04/10/2012 at 7:13am - animals - by tay (man) - Australia

Today, I had to break up a fist fight between two female residents. I work in a retirement home. FML

#20791178
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41422) - you deserved it (3073)

On 07/18/2013 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mum dismissed my diagnosed schizophrenia as "too much time with those earphones in". FML

#20897726
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38982) - you deserved it (3073)

On 09/27/2013 at 3:56am - health - by awkwardology - Australia (Queensland)

Today, after months of job hunting, I finally got a phone interview with a company. Excited, I prepared for the interview and conducted extensive research on the company. The interview ended within a minute. They'd got the wrong person. FML

#21219731
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40395) - you deserved it (3073)

On 07/24/2014 at 10:04pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend decided it would be a funny idea to spray me with a hose while I was holding a kitten, showing her how cute we were. Needless to say, now I'm covered head to toe in cat scratches. FML

#7870417
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22239) - you deserved it (3072)

On 02/04/2010 at 3:40am - health - by littlespoon (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I proudly presented my research project in class that I've worked for day and night for 3 weeks straight. My teacher fell asleep. FML

#18067100
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23419) - you deserved it (3072)

On 10/24/2011 at 9:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a man with a clipboard came up to me in the street to ask me if I was happy with my life insurance. I couldn't bring myself to admit to him that I'm so clueless about my own life that I wasn't sure I was even happy with the Twix I was eating at the time. FML

#20095768
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15843) - you deserved it (3072)

On 09/30/2012 at 8:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my husband put some photos of our wedding on Facebook. He named the album "FML". FML

#19832174
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29259) - you deserved it (3072)

On 06/23/2012 at 1:17am - misc - by blah56 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I tried to cuddle Simon, my five year old son. He wriggled away and said: "If you need a teddy bear, go buy one! Or find another Simon!" FML

#697
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26898) - you deserved it (3072)

On 01/03/2009 at 10:55pm - kids - by sly - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend texted me and said I had forgotten my blue bra. I don't have any blue bras. FML

#18534349
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40477) - you deserved it (3071)

On 12/17/2011 at 8:17am - love - by fmll - Norway (Hordaland)



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