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Today, I was fired from the trucking company I work for, due to numerous complaints about my reckless driving. I don't even do driving work there, but my ex keeps calling in to report me, and my boss wanted the calls to stop. FML

#15285580
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36096) - you deserved it (2972)

On 03/12/2011 at 6:18pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mom confessed that she has to make up compliments to give to prove me wrong when I said she can never say positive things about me. FML

#16053231
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22442) - you deserved it (2972)

On 05/05/2011 at 2:13am - misc - by wow -

Today, when I went to pick up my daughter from preschool, I found out she'd "accidentally" tried to flush her clothes down the toilet while going to the bathroom. FML

#10713367
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23184) - you deserved it (2971)

On 05/23/2010 at 2:02pm - kids - by rkl2010 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, in front of my family, my brother's wife announced that she was pregnant with their first child. Everyone joked around and said I was next. Two weeks ago I found out that I'm sterile. FML

#15487602
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48516) - you deserved it (2971)

On 03/25/2011 at 8:07pm - health - by dazzla08 -

Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML

#17362826
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44115) - you deserved it (2971)

On 08/04/2011 at 1:44am - animals - by SydIsPrettyCool - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend informed me that our relationship is an open one. This was only after I was told that when she was "stuck in traffic" two days ago, she was actually playing the triple-X version of Twister in my "best friend's" bed. FML

#21008373
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39941) - you deserved it (2971)

On 12/28/2013 at 3:07pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, my dad and I got into an argument, and he ended up calling me a son of a bitch. My mom heard and started arguing with him over him calling her a bitch. Three hours later, I'm now staying at my gran's house with my mom and hoping her threats of a divorce weren't for real. FML

#21241796
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39559) - you deserved it (2971)

On 08/20/2014 at 4:08pm - misc - by sonofaneuroticwench (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I went to get my friend a drink while she sat in the lounge watching TV with my dog. When I came back, I found her licking my dogs ears. She said he dared her to do it. FML

#7540376
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26151) - you deserved it (2970)

On 01/24/2010 at 7:28am - animals - by CheeseMonsters (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, my entire family of five is sharing one roll of toilet paper. My parents refuse to buy any, because my father can get it free from his work. He's forgotten to bring any home every day without fail for the past seven days. FML

#14544910
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23400) - you deserved it (2970)

On 01/11/2011 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, it's my birthday. At my workplace, we always get a cake for whoever's birthday it is. They somehow forgot about me. I've been working there for a year, and my grandparents and my dad own the restaurant I work at. FML

#16324475
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36518) - you deserved it (2970)

On 05/24/2011 at 3:55am - work - by birthdayfail -

Today, while working at Subway, a man ordered a sub with avocado. When I told him it was no longer available, he screamed, spit in my face and ran out, pushing over an innocent bystander in the process. FML

#17142025
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31715) - you deserved it (2970)

On 07/16/2011 at 10:46pm - work - by sandwichmaker - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mother-in-law thought it would be appropriate to give my five-year-old daughter some bedclothes with the Playboy logo all over them. FML

#19152626
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25160) - you deserved it (2970)

On 02/24/2012 at 8:26am - kids - by Joanne (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I made my friends and family laugh by trying to put on costume glasses with a giant super-sized nose attached to them. They laughed hysterically. Not because of the gigantic nose, but because my real nose was radically bigger and the fake one wouldn't fit over it. FML

#19606582
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22184) - you deserved it (2970)

On 05/11/2012 at 9:24am - misc - by MobPerfect (man) - United States (Rhode Island)



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