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Today, my sister teased me about being a mistake baby. When I told my mom what my sister said, her response was "I still love you anyway". FML

by melissa / 02/10/2009 at 6:41pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought my mom a gift certificate for a spa treatment for two so we could spend some quality time together. She took my sister. FML

by Anonymous / 05/10/2009 at 2:37pm / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was meeting my husband's old friends at his 20 year high school reunion. He introduced me as his 'friend from work' to his ex girlfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2010 at 11:03am / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up, and he came by to get his things while I was at work. When I got home I saw that the only thing he had taken was my cat. I only dated him for 5 months, I've had that cat for 14 years. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2010 at 12:20am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, I woke up to the news that my mom's in jail. FML

by mymomsstupid / 06/29/2011 at 10:51am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at my aunt's wedding, the time for the tossing of the bouquet came and the announcer asked for all the single ladies to gather behind the bride. I was the only one. FML

by single lady / 08/15/2011 at 10:45am / United States (California) / Love

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

by unknown52 / 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm / Netherlands (Overijssel) / Health

Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom, only to find my dad sitting on the toilet, blind drunk. He screamed "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" at me. I just wanted to shave. FML

by :/ / 11/05/2013 at 4:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was looking through my computer's history to find a website I had visited. I found an online forum where my son was discussing how to inject Oxycontin. FML

by Rehab / 02/11/2010 at 2:58pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, my boss asked for recommendations on how to improve the office. I sent her an e-mail full of my ideas. Later, my boss sent me a reply, saying, "Here's what head office thinks of your ideas." It contained a list of insults upper management made about me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2011 at 8:23am / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I was upset because my brother, who I'm very close to, didn't call me for my birthday yesterday. I told my mom about it, and we both immediately went silent on the phone, as we both realized she forgot to call me yesterday as well. FML

by birthday_loser / 01/23/2013 at 2:33pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking home from a horrible day at work, when some idiot emptied a trashcan on my head from his apartment balcony. He cried "Oh shit!" and apologized because I wasn't his intended target. FML

by Anonymous / 01/12/2014 at 12:28pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had an important oral report to deliver with a partner. Not only did he come in late and high, he pronounced Virginia as "Vagina" the whole way through. FML

by Jamestown of Vagina / 09/13/2014 at 10:36am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous