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Today, I had my 21st birthday party. My friends told me to have the party even though it had been 5 months since my actual 21st birthday. They asked me why I didn't have one originally and I jokingly told them it was because I didn't think anyone would come. Turned out nobody came after all. FML

#5926430
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30579) - you deserved it (3000)

On 10/21/2009 at 8:15am - misc - by JimmySmoothBeans (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was teaching a ten year old how to play piano. Halfway through the lesson, she made a minor mistake, which, trying to be a good tutor, I corrected her. She smiled up at me, paused, then slammed the key cover down onto my fingers. FML

#6245178
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36123) - you deserved it (3000)

On 11/10/2009 at 4:41pm - misc - by PiaNO (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was working as a counsellor at a special needs camp when one of the parents came up to my friend and asked her what my disorder was. FML

#10699156
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26429) - you deserved it (3000)

On 05/22/2010 at 9:24pm - misc - by *sigh* - United States (Indiana)

Today, my dad awkwardly asked me how to selectively clear his browser history. Apparently, my mom discovered his browsing habits and tore him a new one for looking at "nothing but vile smut". FML

#16606089
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26650) - you deserved it (3000)

On 06/11/2011 at 2:37am - intimacy - by dadisgoatboy - Switzerland (Aargau)

Today, a five year old that I am babysitting picked up a knife and said he would chop my nuts off if I didn't give him his ice cream before dinner. Only 5 more hours to go. FML

#17672212
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29076) - you deserved it (3000)

On 09/05/2011 at 4:23pm - kids - by thatoneguy - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at my mom's funeral. My sisters and I were sitting in the front row. The funeral director, whom we had met with twice before, was going around greeting everyone. When she got to us, she asked where our mom was. Seriously? FML

#21189397
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56336) - you deserved it (3000)

On 06/26/2014 at 5:13pm - misc - by Alex - United States (Hawaii)

Today, some assface hacked my recently deceased friend's Facebook account. The person changed my friend's location to "Hell", then posted a status saying how hot the weather was, and replied "I wish :'(" to someone who'd said my friend was in a better place now. FML

#21257037
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44090) - you deserved it (3000)

On 09/12/2014 at 5:11pm - misc - by he's not the one going to hell (man) - Australia

Today, my wife screamed at me, calling me a "useless, ungrateful piece of crap", all because I wouldn't have sex with her, despite hours of her nagging. I said no because I've been laid-up in bed for the past week waiting on surgery for an excruciatingly painful hernia. FML

#18986736
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33523) - you deserved it (2999)

On 02/03/2012 at 8:17pm - intimacy - by B (man) - United States

Today, my wife, daughter, and I get to spend the next 4 hours in the ER. Why? Because we're all throwing up at the same time. At least it counts as a family activity. FML

#11911346
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26446) - you deserved it (2998)

On 07/16/2010 at 12:17am - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was eating a fancy dinner with my girlfriend at a restaurant. Suddenly, my ex-girlfriend, who was seemingly still angry after our breakup 2 years ago, saw me through the window. She walked in, took my spaghetti dinner, shoved it in my face, and stormed out. FML

#20148447
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25258) - you deserved it (2998)

On 11/05/2012 at 2:02am - love - by sad (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML

#21202372
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41505) - you deserved it (2998)

On 07/08/2014 at 12:26am - work - by MaddyN - United States (Oregon)

Today, the tree that my neighbors have neglected to cut down fell on my car. They claim that by law, they aren't responsible and don't have to pay for it. FML

#16003860
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33802) - you deserved it (2997)

On 05/01/2011 at 12:31pm - money - by me - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I'm getting kicked out of my flat because my drunk friends stole a pony and left it tied outside. FML

#17669700
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25956) - you deserved it (2997)

On 09/05/2011 at 11:03am - misc - by thefrightening1 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)



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