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Today, my new colleagues took me up on my idea of a group night out. Perhaps they'll actually invite me along next time. FML

#20911387
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34359) - you deserved it (2352)

On 10/07/2013 at 6:51pm - work - by Loner_Lou (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I woke up to two text messages from my mother. The first said, "You could've had this for breakfast. How do you like your eggs?" The next text was a picture message of her naked. I think it was meant to be sent to her boyfriend. FML

#13715674
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33218) - you deserved it (2351)

On 11/04/2010 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by traumatized4life (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was hit by a car in a parking lot. The person sped off; I broke three ribs. My parents screamed at me for not getting the driver's info. FML

#20565033
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35711) - you deserved it (2351)

On 03/29/2013 at 4:33am - misc - by TheRuleEnforcer (man) - United States

Today, I was going to end a thing I had with this guy. It turned out that he got back together with his ex-girlfriend and was just using me as a back up. FML

#2522
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12410) - you deserved it (2350)

On 01/25/2009 at 11:47am - love - by thesporkhop - United States (Nevada)

Today, my boss was skeptical when I told her I had a terrible migraine and needed to go home for the day early. I removed all her doubts by puking over her. FML

#13885565
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26083) - you deserved it (2350)

On 11/18/2010 at 7:12am - work - by pukishgirl (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I was taking the bus back to my university campus, having left work early feeling sick. While on the bus I started retching. I managed to hold it in for a while, but as I stood up to get off the bus, I started puking through my mouth and nose. This was in front of twenty other passengers. FML

#14153644
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22956) - you deserved it (2350)

On 12/10/2010 at 12:21pm - health - by pukathlon - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my teacher, who's Irish, called me insensitive and stupid for imitating her accent. I'm Filipino and my parents immigrated to Ireland where I was born, and then we moved to Canada when I was 14. Her response to my explanation? "Bullshit." FML

#18841081
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32213) - you deserved it (2350)

On 01/18/2012 at 12:21am - misc - by meh - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I received a phone call that started with, "Now stay calm... Your house is on fire." FML

#20834558
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44497) - you deserved it (2350)

On 08/12/2013 at 10:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I came into the kitchen to see how dinner was coming along. My mother was milling the meat around the skillet with the cat's poop scooper as a spatula. FML

#20856980
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38372) - you deserved it (2350)

On 08/27/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I had to explain to my grandfather that Canadians aren't evil by reminding him that he's Canadian. FML

#20885056
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35296) - you deserved it (2350)

On 09/17/2013 at 10:21am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to give a speech in front of my class and during my speech I had to say the words "But six"; however, because of my accent it sounded like "Butt sex". For the remainder of the day I was frequently asked about "Butt sex". FML

#1040
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20206) - you deserved it (2349)

On 01/13/2009 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by Explicit - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend told me he watched True Life I'm Pregnant. Now I know why we haven't been having sex. FML

#3148
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18647) - you deserved it (2349)

On 01/28/2009 at 4:58pm - intimacy - by hgirl - United States (Maryland)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after a year of living together. She told me that she met someone else and wanted to move out. She moved out... but moved her things into my roommate's bedroom. FML

#79769
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51085) - you deserved it (2349)

On 02/19/2009 at 4:52pm - love - by killmenow (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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