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Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML

#6512953
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37164) - you deserved it (3213)

On 11/29/2009 at 1:10pm - misc - by Yoooooo0 (woman) - United States

Today, I was crying because my cat died. My boyfriend cupped my face in his hands, looked me straight into the eyes and said, "I love seeing you cry." FML

#8969513
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33859) - you deserved it (3213)

On 03/10/2010 at 11:08am - love - by sliceddice (woman) - Denmark (Staden Kobenhavn)

Today, I'm so insecure that I was still slightly flattered when the demented old man at the nursing home where I work hit on me, because at least somebody finds me attractive. FML

#18712372
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23582) - you deserved it (3213)

On 01/05/2012 at 12:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my husband went nuts. He's quit his job and set out building an amateur bomb shelter in our backyard. According to him, there's "substantial evidence" that cannibalism is on the rise across the country, and that "it's gonna be like Resident Evil out there, babe." FML

#19738484
343 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29140) - you deserved it (3213)

On 06/05/2012 at 1:21pm - love - by why... (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend promised me he wouldn't leave me alone in Niagara. I'm currently sitting alone in the hotel room drinking a bottle of wine while he gambles away money he doesn't have. FML

#20116235
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21325) - you deserved it (3213)

On 10/14/2012 at 8:43am - love - by lonelygirl - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit at me because I laughed at her idea of getting the Cullen family tree tattooed on her back. FML

#20079438
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31093) - you deserved it (3213)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:22pm - love - by Shame (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I showed up at my brother's house for a visit. Little did I know, there was a family gathering. My bestfriend was invited and I wasn't. She's "more fun and less awkward" than I am. FML

#20864835
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38691) - you deserved it (3213)

On 09/02/2013 at 5:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend takes videos of me sleeping and watches them with her friends. FML

#21250632
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35868) - you deserved it (3213)

On 09/02/2014 at 5:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my youngest daughter finally started using the toilet on her own. That is, until her older sister showed her the South Park episode where someone gets their intestines sucked out by flushing the toilet. Now she won't go anywhere near the bathroom. FML

#21355782
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31783) - you deserved it (3213)

On 02/14/2015 at 4:46am - kids - by Investing in Toilet Seatbelts - United States (Nevada)

Today, my ex called me up to suggest that we become friends, only so that she could introduce me to her new boyfriend. FML

#21375599
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (132) - you deserved it (3213)

On 03/16/2015 at 10:36am - love - by xswitch74 (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I went to my boyfriend's mom's house for the first time. They had a cook-out so I got to meet his whole entire family. I went into the kitchen to find a huge picture of his ex-girlfriend on his mom's fridge. FML

#11163519
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35822) - you deserved it (3212)

On 06/13/2010 at 3:48am - love - by Yup (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my parents told me that I had been accepted into my top two colleges, but they didn't show me the letters because they were worried that if they spent money on tuition, they wouldn't be able to keep BOTH of their brand new Mercedes. FML

Today, I tried to put the little girl I babysit in timeout for lying to me. I was about to sit her down when she made a mad dash for the basement stairs, slipped on the wood floor, and fell down them. She told her parents and everyone at the ER that I had thrown her down the stairs. FML

#20956092
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54474) - you deserved it (3213)

On 11/13/2013 at 6:08am - kids - by little_star78 - United States (Michigan)



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