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Today, one of my boyfriend's friends ranted on about how I am such a crappy girlfriend and how all of his friends don't like me. I just spent over $200 on a surprise party that I invited them all to last weekend. FML

#14597219
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24870) - you deserved it (3070)

On 01/16/2011 at 1:50am - misc - by me - United States (Georgia)

Today, I celebrated my birthday with a few friends at home. As I bent down over my cake, my friend pushed my face into it. The baker should have told me she put in a stick to support the cake. FML

#15914816
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36121) - you deserved it (3070)

On 04/25/2011 at 1:01am - misc - by Mr. Headshot -

Today, my boyfriend texted me and said I had forgotten my blue bra. I don't have any blue bras. FML

#18534349
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40427) - you deserved it (3070)

On 12/17/2011 at 8:17am - love - by fmll - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, when I excitedly announced to my mother-in-law that I was pregnant, she looked at me with a blank expression and asked me who the father was. She's 45. She's not senile or suffering from dementia, but apparently just suffering from being a chronic bitch. FML

#18834443
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35316) - you deserved it (3070)

On 01/17/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by littlelottie - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to my high school reunion. Someone walked up to me and said, "Wow, you look so different!" She then followed it up with, "You used to be so pretty, what happened?" FML

#20849795
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39104) - you deserved it (3070)

On 08/22/2013 at 7:40pm - misc - by Ugly (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I turned 17. My parents completely forgot it was my birthday, and when I reminded them, my dad thought it was my 18th. He was ecstatic and mentioned that I can "finally get the hell out." FML

#20816873
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48178) - you deserved it (3070)

On 08/02/2013 at 11:29am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mum dismissed my diagnosed schizophrenia as "too much time with those earphones in". FML

#20897726
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38944) - you deserved it (3070)

On 09/27/2013 at 3:56am - health - by awkwardology - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I came home on leave from a 7 month deployment to Iraq. I wanted to see my girlfriend today, but she needed to spend time with her sick grandmother. As it turns out, her sick grandmother and my cousin are the same person. FML

#4467234
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55665) - you deserved it (3069)

On 08/12/2009 at 2:01am - love - by FUSMC (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend decided it would be a funny idea to spray me with a hose while I was holding a kitten, showing her how cute we were. Needless to say, now I'm covered head to toe in cat scratches. FML

#7870417
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22195) - you deserved it (3069)

On 02/04/2010 at 3:40am - health - by littlespoon (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I walked into the kitchen at 5 am, to have my 7 and 9 year olds throw a bucket of water on me. To their surprise and horror, I didn't melt. FML

#20116347
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22762) - you deserved it (3069)

On 10/14/2012 at 10:57am - kids - by Nickki - United States

Today, I opened the door to go out for groceries. Lying on my doorstep was a pile of poop. A piece of paper was taped to the ground beside it that read, "Do it again and you'll get more than dog shit." I don't have the slightest clue who I pissed off, or how. FML

#20455625
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31348) - you deserved it (3069)

On 01/12/2013 at 5:02pm - misc - by fucking mafia or what?? (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, someone broke into my car by smashing the driver's side window. I'd be less irritated if they had just used the door handle; the lock has been broken for years. FML

#20467580
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28593) - you deserved it (3069)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:14am - money - by Perplexed - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I had to break up a fist fight between two female residents. I work in a retirement home. FML

#20791178
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41381) - you deserved it (3069)

On 07/18/2013 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)



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