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Today, my sister drove past me while i was walking home in the rain, she honked to let me know she was there, and kept on driving. FML

#16480060
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37739) - you deserved it (3288)

On 06/03/2011 at 4:55am - misc - by myhairgetsfrizzywhenwet (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while getting ready to go to bed, I told my boyfriend that I feel depressed due to the lack of intimacy in our relationship. His response was to roll over, fall asleep, and send a deadly fart my way. FML

#19990004
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22020) - you deserved it (3288)

On 07/29/2012 at 12:25am - love - by Anonymous - Denmark (Sjelland)

Today, I woke up with the worst vaginal itching and swelling. I then find out it was brought on by my boyfriend's cheap brand of toilet paper. FML

#19173596
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23152) - you deserved it (3288)

On 02/27/2012 at 7:29am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after much reluctance due to fear of causing a huge debate, I finally posted something on Facebook about the presidential debates. However, the post sparked an argument with my mom's childhood best friend, that ended with her telling me that my dad isn't actually my dad. FML

#20120633
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28075) - you deserved it (3288)

On 10/17/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by bastardchild_01 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I had to go to the hospital for an allergic reaction. Turns out, I'm highly allergic to cherry blossoms. My wife and I just bought a house and moved into a new neighborhood. Almost every block in this neighborhood, including my own, has rows and rows of cherry blossom trees. FML

#20628272
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44261) - you deserved it (3288)

On 04/28/2013 at 6:10pm - health - by verycherryfucked (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML

#21092834
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41069) - you deserved it (3288)

On 03/21/2014 at 5:44pm - health - by iusedprotectionanyway (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I moved into my new house. The previous occupants failed to tell me that they'd recently kicked out their crazy crackhead son, who seems to think they've paid me to pretend that they've moved out and that I'm the new owner. He wants back in. FML

#21136773
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42780) - you deserved it (3288)

On 05/11/2014 at 3:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, some well-meaning soul told me to just pray my depression away, which would be about as effective as praying away a knife in my shin. FML

#21382206
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23708) - you deserved it (3288)

On 03/27/2015 at 1:31am - misc - by an anon - United States (California)

Today, my best friend had set me up on a blind date. The guy demonstrated at length that he could do different cartoon voices such as Donald Duck, Droopy and many others the entire time. Oh, and he also kept wanting to talk about his farts. FML

#8529668
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26603) - you deserved it (3287)

On 02/21/2010 at 9:12pm - love - by Court - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was meeting my husband's old friends at his 20 year high school reunion. He introduced me as his 'friend from work' to his ex girlfriend. FML

#12224799
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38743) - you deserved it (3287)

On 07/31/2010 at 11:03am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, Amazon didn't deliver the present I bought my mother for Mothering Sunday, so she called me an 'Ungrateful bastard.' And about half an hour ago, I cut my thumb whilst making her lunch. She said, 'You're doing this on purpose so I feel sorry for you. Well I don't.' FML

#15618704
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35234) - you deserved it (3287)

On 04/03/2011 at 9:32am - misc - by Trainspotting - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Today, I broke my collarbone in a rugby tournament. I was forced to sit through five more hours of games because the coach wouldn't take me to the hospital until the tournament was over. FML

#16929999
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32850) - you deserved it (3287)

On 07/01/2011 at 12:15am - health - by nico (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was accused of masturbating during work. I was actually just getting something out of my pocket. FML

#17962463
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31119) - you deserved it (3287)

On 10/11/2011 at 8:19pm - intimacy - by dinosaucer - United States (Delaware)



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