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Saturday 19 April 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went to a restaurant for a friend's birthday. There were two very attractive waiters. They waited until I went to the toilet to sit down, talk to my friends and hit on them. They promptly left upon my return. Men avoid me. FML

Today, my boyfriend turned down a job that would have more than doubled his income because he didn't want to upset his current boss by quitting. FML

Today, I realized that the only female who shows any sexual interest in me at all is my 70-year-old neighbor. FML

#21113897
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32887) - you deserved it (3258)

On 04/15/2014 at 5:55pm - love - by gerontofuck (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I took my kids to an Easter party hosted by a local church. The nice lady in charge told the kids, "Jesus died, but He rose to life again!" My 9 year old screamed, "LIKE A ZOMBIE!" FML

#21116666
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17853) - you deserved it (3194)

On 04/18/2014 at 8:14pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, one of my most problematic students remained after class, whence he strongly insinuated his interest in receiving oral sex; I tried to convey just how inappropriate that was, when he interrupted, "Look, will you at least touch it?" FML

#21114779
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37051) - you deserved it (3122)

On 04/16/2014 at 6:03pm - intimacy - by MILF (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, it's my birthday. The only people who wished me a happy birthday were the ones who saw the "birthday boy" poster my sister plastered around school, which included a photo of me as a kid dressed up as a girl. FML

#21114561
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33579) - you deserved it (3014)

On 04/16/2014 at 1:24pm - misc - by birthdaygirl - United States (California)

Today, my ex-husband came to pick up our two kids for his weekend with them. Seeing his new girlfriend was in the car, and desperate for conversation, I asked her name. My kids unhesitatingly blurted out, "Mom". FML

#21115862
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34558) - you deserved it (3025)

On 04/17/2014 at 10:31pm - kids - by mommy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got a Facebook message from a cute guy I used to work with. He admitted to liking me and when I asked why we never hung out he admitted that my dad, his boss at the time, threatened every guy I have ever worked with. FML

#21113585
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39638) - you deserved it (3000)

On 04/15/2014 at 10:01am - love - by cricha4208 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had my teacher look over my essay before turning it in. He said it was extremely well-written, so I handed it in. When I got it back, the feedback he left said it was one of the worst essays he'd ever read. FML

#21115571
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36158) - you deserved it (2993)

On 04/17/2014 at 3:59pm - work - by badessaymyass (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got a call from the police that my house had been burglarized, but an off-duty cop caught the criminal. I pull up to see my detained, psycho ex-boyfriend sheepishly grinning at me. He had three of my lace panties and two of my bras, claiming it was "all for memories sake". FML

#21115090
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36680) - you deserved it (2850)

On 04/16/2014 at 11:14pm - love - by exasperated (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to go to a therapy group to help with my anxiety and to meet people who felt similar. I joked with my friend that no one would turn up as people might feel anxious about going. I was right. I was the only one there. FML

#21113050
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32457) - you deserved it (2827)

On 04/14/2014 at 7:34pm - misc - by all by myself (woman) - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

#21116703
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16654) - you deserved it (2381)

On 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm - work - by Anonymous - Norway (Nordland)

Today, after ten years, our sewing machine broke. My mom tried to return it back to the store she bought it from. FML

#21115731
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26566) - you deserved it (2250)

On 04/17/2014 at 7:24pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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