Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Sunday 22 December 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while at the gym, I noticed a creepy-looking guy watching me. When I got up from the equipment, I noticed that he sniffed the seat. I didn't say anything the first time. After he did it the second time, I asked him to stop. He bent down and sniffed it without breaking eye contact. FML

#20996147
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47433) - you deserved it (3501)

On 12/17/2013 at 6:48pm - misc - by gymgirl - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss decided that a mug and a public 'thank you' were a sufficient substitute for a Christmas bonus. FML

#20998949
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35980) - you deserved it (3497)

On 12/20/2013 at 9:27am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, my class was interrupted by flowers, balloons and chocolates. Then he sang to me a song he wrote himself. This was all for our one-year anniversary. It probably would have been the best day of my life... if I knew who he was. FML

#20997138
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45010) - you deserved it (3483)

On 12/18/2013 at 4:20pm - love - by romance sucks. (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my brother got a new saxophone. He thought a good way to break it in was to play it in my ear. Loudly. While I was sleeping. FML

#21001557
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35985) - you deserved it (3444)

On 12/22/2013 at 4:56pm - misc - by blackcarnation - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML

#21002970
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40064) - you deserved it (3363)

On 12/23/2013 at 9:48pm - love - by .... (man) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered my mom has been using my credit card to buy everyone's Christmas presents. FML

#20995385
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44676) - you deserved it (3361)

On 12/17/2013 at 12:02am - money - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went to a local bar for a speed dating event. The first person I hooked up with took one look at my face, burst into laughter, and walked out of the bar practically doubling over. FML

#21000904
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38300) - you deserved it (3361)

On 12/22/2013 at 12:37am - misc - by Isitreallythatbad, (woman) - United States

Today, my mum and I were referred to as "ladies". I'm happy for her, since she always complains about looking masculine. However, I would still like to be called a gentleman, seeing as how I am one. FML

#21000124
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41598) - you deserved it (3357)

On 12/21/2013 at 11:58am - misc - by FML (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I came home after working on a difficult case. My husband wasn't home so I hopped into bed. My feet felt something and I reached down and picked it up out of the sheets. It was lacy black thongs. I don't own black thongs. FML

#20999870
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51203) - you deserved it (3344)

On 12/21/2013 at 2:08am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after finals, my English professor left me less than one percent from an A. Why? All semester long, he took away points because my opinions did not match his. FML

Today, my boyfriend told me that we need to talk. I think he dumped me, but I'm not sure, because he muttered it in Russian and quickly left. FML

#21009542
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41248) - you deserved it (3331)

On 12/29/2013 at 5:58pm - love - by RustyRuski (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, while staying at my brother's place for the Christmas holidays, I had to leave because he threatened to "take me outside". Apparently he doesn't like being corrected on whether a certain car has a long wheel base version, so I guess the family Christmas is over. FML

#21005745
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28404) - you deserved it (3297)

On 12/26/2013 at 12:30am - misc - by detour165 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, me and some friends had home-made burgers for lunch. The guy who did the cooking later insisted that spitting in a frying pan is a perfectly acceptable way of guessing the right time to add the oil. FML

#21009569
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37545) - you deserved it (3278)

On 12/29/2013 at 6:28pm - health - by HungerStrike (man) - Czech Republic (Stredocesky kraj)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: