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Thursday 24 October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I decided to try LSD with a few friends in a safe environment. As an artist, I had planned to spend my trip doing psychedelic paintings and had all my supplies set up. Apparently I spent most of my time in fetal position muttering about the "evil easel" and never even touched my canvas. FML

#20930479
330 comments

Today, my girlfriend asked me if I could love anything more than her, and if so, what. I guess "bacon" was the wrong answer. FML

#20936378
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29507) - you deserved it (43686)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:58am - love - by BaconLover - Japan

Today, I finally got to surprise my boyfriend with a birthday cake. I spent four days planning the perfect one. First thing he says? "Erm, you know I'm 32, right?" I got his age wrong. FML

#20937690
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29921) - you deserved it (35070)

On 10/29/2013 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I saw a wasp on the ground, apparently injured and unable to fly. It was being mobbed by ants and looked certain to die, so I stamped on the ants to save its life. At this point it sprung up, stung me, then flew off. FML

#20932403
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39022) - you deserved it (27017)

On 10/24/2013 at 2:04pm - animals - by MBean (man) - Anguilla

Today, my ex boyfriend got into a physical fight with the guy I've been casually seeing for 9 months. Afterwards, they had a beer, a long chat, and decided this was my fault and I wasn't worth the drama. FML

#20933266
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46451) - you deserved it (20724)

On 10/25/2013 at 7:54am - love - by what did I do? - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to school without any makeup on. The guys who usually compliment me for being pretty are now calling me "The Greatest Illusion Ever". FML

#20936906
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46546) - you deserved it (20634)

On 10/28/2013 at 4:31pm - misc - by The greatest Illusion ever (woman) - United States

Today, I went to a haunted house with the girl I like, thinking that she would get scared and turn to me for comfort. I ended up running out, and was put on the Wall of Shame. FML

#20933080
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37392) - you deserved it (19999)

On 10/25/2013 at 12:35am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, a radio show asked the question, "Where does the dentist live in Finding Nemo?" I called in and got through. When he asked me the question, instead of the actual answer I quickly gave out my own address over live radio. FML

#20939023
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39562) - you deserved it (18750)

On 10/30/2013 at 11:58am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my 19-year-old, long-distance boyfriend told me he wouldn't be able to text me all day because it's too hard to type while in his Spider-Man suit. It's non-negotiable. FML

#20940116
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38744) - you deserved it (14831)

On 10/31/2013 at 10:30am - love - by AML (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend came onto me in a romantic gesture. We ended up having sex, forgetting that the window repair guy was supposed to come today and do some work on our third floor apartment windows. I still don't know how much he saw. FML

#20939175
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46974) - you deserved it (14652)

On 10/30/2013 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by English_Nut117 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

#20937985
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49077) - you deserved it (13361)

On 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous - Zimbabwe

Today, my best friend went in for her scheduled mammogram, and I sent her a text saying, "How're your boobies?" It was only after I sent it that I realized I'd sent it to my history professor. FML

#20930198
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41905) - you deserved it (12573)

On 10/22/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)



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