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Friday 11 October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, in calculus, our substitute teacher told me I was smart. Everybody in the class, including my friends, burst out laughing. FML

#20923824
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44404) - you deserved it (4489)

On 10/17/2013 at 9:43am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was working a kid's birthday party dressed as a clown. The child's mother made me change because he was scared of clowns. The only thing I had in my car was a princess costume that was owned by a girl co-worker. So for 4 hours I had to entertain in a tight pink dress. I'm a guy. FML

#20913049
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41940) - you deserved it (4474)

On 10/08/2013 at 9:19pm - kids - by Allycat (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my parents dropped by my new house, and my mother offered to tidy up for me while I was out. After they left, I noticed that her "tidying up" included throwing out all the pictures of my girlfriend and replacing them with pictures of herself. FML

#20921711
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47313) - you deserved it (4466)

On 10/15/2013 at 4:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I created a poster trying to raise self-harm awareness in teens for my school. They sent me to the counselor, suspended me, and recommended I go to therapy. FML

Today, I found out that my phone fits perfectly through the slot between the elevator and the floor. FML

#20921212
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47572) - you deserved it (4419)

On 10/15/2013 at 2:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went on a first date. He left me standing at a bus stop while he took a dump in some bushes. FML

#20922179
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48262) - you deserved it (4381)

On 10/15/2013 at 11:10pm - love - by highlydisgusted - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came across some bubble wrap. Turned out it was a special type of bubble wrap that cannot be popped. FML

#20924315
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48171) - you deserved it (4363)

On 10/17/2013 at 6:57pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered my 10 month old is terrified of my laugh. Every time I start to laugh, she screams in terror. It's getting depressing. FML

#20917208
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47331) - you deserved it (4215)

On 10/12/2013 at 1:40am - kids - by easily amused (woman) - United States

Today, I figured out my 1-year-old daughter likes to dip her hand in our dogs' water bowl, and rub the water on her face. So I put the water bowl out of reach. She then figured out how to open the bathroom door and use the toilet instead. FML

#20918462
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40573) - you deserved it (4153)

On 10/13/2013 at 1:51am - misc - by Water Daughter - United States

Today, my friend texted me from a bar, saying they had just called my name in a raffle to win a trip to Aspen, CO. You had to be at the bar to claim the prize. I had left the bar half-an-hour earlier, not knowing they were even having a raffle. FML

#20920627
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42559) - you deserved it (4149)

On 10/14/2013 at 8:14pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I called my dad to let him know some details for my wedding had changed. It would have been really nice if he had paused the porno I could clearly hear in the background. FML

#20921288
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49660) - you deserved it (4145)

On 10/15/2013 at 6:10am - intimacy - by hes (woman) - United States

Today, I was at the dentist getting a cavity fixed for the first time. The dentist showed me the drill and other tools, and referred to them as things like "Mr. Bumpy Brush". I'm 15. She thought I was "special". FML

#20923550
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45026) - you deserved it (4048)

On 10/17/2013 at 1:06am - health - by maxkeyftw (man) - United States (California)

Today, some ass-bandit broke into my house by smashing a window, just so he could steal the ancient VHS cassette player that my wife wouldn't let me throw away. Thanks, scumbag, but the front door was unlocked. FML

#20919168
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45781) - you deserved it (4024)

On 10/13/2013 at 5:50pm - money - by and she blames me -_- (man) - Canada (Alberta)



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