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Saturday 28 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

#20898181
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67211) - you deserved it (4080)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was working the night shift when a guy came in smelling like alcohol. He kept muttering his order, so I leaned over the register to hear him better. My ear now smells of vomit. FML

#20897734
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37915) - you deserved it (4073)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:18am - work - by ihatethisjob - United States (Michigan)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, but the ring turned out to be quite tight on her finger. She then chewed me out, saying that I can't do anything right, then changed her answer to no. FML

#20899091
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46927) - you deserved it (4061)

On 09/28/2013 at 12:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Serbia

Today, I came home to find my parents wearing Santa hats and blasting Christmas music at full volume. So begins three months of hell. FML

#20898104
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39028) - you deserved it (4037)

On 09/27/2013 at 3:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my husband and I switched phones by accident. I've already received several naked pictures from one of his co-workers. FML

#20898640
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59386) - you deserved it (3999)

On 09/28/2013 at 12:08am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

#20908389
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48477) - you deserved it (3992)

On 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm - misc - by british_babe (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I got married. The officiant of the ceremony referred to me as Amanda through my ceremony. My name is Anna. FML

#20904287
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45254) - you deserved it (3955)

On 10/02/2013 at 1:54am - love - by KamiyaHaine (woman) - Singapore

Today, the person I've been trying so hard to get with wrote me a beautiful poem that almost everyone at my school saw and liked. It was about how we'd never be together. FML

#20904440
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45270) - you deserved it (3927)

On 10/02/2013 at 8:17am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend's dad said he'd given my boyfriend £100 to take me out for a meal last night and he hoped I'd enjoyed it. Last night my boyfriend and I went to pizza hut, shared a pizza and split the bill. Turns out my boyfriend had simply pocketed the money without telling anyone. FML

#20903132
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47554) - you deserved it (3755)

On 10/01/2013 at 8:32am - love - by hmmm (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, at work, I was taking a woman's measurements while she held her screaming baby. To silence the infant, she whipped out her breast right there and started feeding him. Moments later, he puked breast milk all over my desk. FML

#20905964
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41672) - you deserved it (3688)

On 10/03/2013 at 1:39pm - work - by blargh - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, I was told there was a bench warrant out for my arrest because a notice to appear for jury duty was sent to my old address and I never responded. I haven't lived at my old address for 2 years. FML

#20903036
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39269) - you deserved it (3651)

On 10/01/2013 at 4:34am - misc - by novapine (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, we got my dad an iPad for his birthday. I had to repeatedly reassure him that he could in fact touch the screen without being shocked. FML

#20899491
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37732) - you deserved it (3626)

On 09/28/2013 at 5:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, I woke up to my cat slowly dragging her paw across my face. I opened my eyes to see a bloody mouse dangling an inch from my face. It was still twitching. FML

#20908715
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43032) - you deserved it (3605)

On 10/05/2013 at 6:34pm - animals - by animal lover... -



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